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Ethics and Standards for Athens Polyamory
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Thank you for looking us up! Athens Polyamory is a social and networking club for poly people in the Classic City. We meet the first Saturday of each month.
If you are interested in a leadership position or have special talents you would like to contribute to the formation of this group please contact us through Facebook!
General polyamory resources
Athens Polyamory: Mission Statement
Athens Polyamory’s mission is to create a vibrant community for polyamorous (and poly-friendly) people in the Classic City. We are passionate about promoting public awareness to increase understanding about this style of relationship. We are dedicated to the values of equality and social justice, and above all, aim to cultivate safe spaces for members of the gender/romantic/sexual minority (GRSM) family.
In the winter of 2013, a small group of people, friends and strangers alike, came together, recognizing a great need in Athens for a poly community. Each one of us came to this group with different dating and life experiences, as well as our own strengths, weaknesses. We celebrate the fact that we live in a culture where forming a group like this is even possible; at the same time, we recognize that this is uncharted territory for most of us, and we will probably not get everything right on the first try. Below we have outlined some general thoughts on this group and later go into specifics of Ethics and Standards.
There are as many different ways to be poly as there are people who identify as poly. This can lead to comparing, judging, and gossiping about others. We challenge you to be mindful of these negative thoughts. Try to remember that for progress, we don’t want to just tolerate differences, but to celebrate them because that is the spice of life. When we think about the level of strife in humans ten thousand, a thousand, or even fifty years ago, we realize that we have come a long way, but we still have a long way to go. We will all make boneheaded mistakes, put our foot in our mouth, and frankly, have a bad day every now and then. We strive to remember that the content of our character is not measured by mistakes, but what we do afterwards.This principle is the ethical foundation of Athens Polyamory. We believe people are fundamentally good, but also imperfect, and we commit to accepting others and ourselves on this basis.
We recognize that in any relationship, there are highly emotional challenges. We are committed to navigating these challenges with patience and understanding. Many times, when there are heartfelt disagreements or when emotions are high, it may be helpful to ask ourselves, “How will these words of mine or these actions of mine advance or impede this mission of this group?” We will strive to focus on the “long view” when faced with difficulties in the present.
We believe two of the greatest challenges to poly relationships are the unvoiced assumptions and expectations (UAE). Everyone has them. Usually, the way these UAEs reach the light of day is when one partner says they are hurt, feel let down, or betrayed, and the other person feels cornered and angry because suddenly they are ‘in trouble’ and thinking, “I didn’t do anything wrong! I didn’t hurt you on purpose! How the hell was I supposed to know that?”When more than one person is involved, it makes things that much more challenging. Thus, we understand and expect that UAEs will also exist within the Athens Polyamory community. We recognize that there is no way around it; there will be misunderstandings and accidental hurt feelings. These things happen in any group, but we know they can be especially poignant for disenfranchised populations like GRSMs. This is because the experiences of past oppression may still be fresh and raw or even ongoing. With this in mind, we decided to form this group using clear communication, and outlining some of our assumptions and expectations. It is our sincere belief that by taking extra time at the beginning, we will lay a solid foundation for the future growth of Athens Polyamory.
A special thanks to Atlanta Polyamory for helping us organize this group.