Re: [movies-307] Movie Meet-up

From: Jennifer
Sent on: Sunday, November 30, 2008 9:36 AM
I don't know you and you don't know me, but I'm compelled to respond to this email.   I was organizer of this group last year and am now assistant organizer for many groups.   I get a chance to see what it's like for someone organizing a group activity.  
Like you said organizing is "truly hard work".   Trying to make a group of people happy and social is not an easy job.   Trying to please the masses is not an easy job.   AND the organizer not only doesn't get paid for this "job" - they actually have to pay to do this job.
When I read your email, I thought that the end of the email would end with "please make me an assistant organizer so that I can lead the kind of meetup I want!".   Nope.... it ended with you leaving because you felt that Willy didn't give you the service or experience you wanted.   So what does that accomplish?  You publicly bash someone and then say toodles?
Until you are willing to step into an organizer's role, you do not get the right to publicly bash anyone personally or how this group is run.
You said that you went to your first meetup and no one went to dinner....  did you make a suggestion?  Did you TELL people that you were interested in doing this?   Probably not...
You went to your second meetup and complained that you sat next to a dud.  Then move or tell him to shut up.   Seriously,  you must take action to correct things you don't like.  You then stated that you turned to pick up your purse and everyone was gone.
now, I know quite a few people in this group, but none of them have the magical power of super-speed.   You might have been there with the special ones... but usually I'm dragging people to get going.   Again, you must take action - keep up with the group, be organized so you're ready to walk out the door, etc.
I could go on with this, but I'm hoping that you get the point by now.
Everything you mentioned is meaningless until you are willing to be an assistant organizer.  If, at that point, you can gracefully deal with the no-shows, last minute cancellations, private emails that bash, public emails that bash, complainers, poorly socialized attendees, etc.  THEN  you can send emails like the one you've sent.
(btw, I've made being an organizer sound horrible.... it's not - I've also made wonderful friends, gotten to have great experiences, and talked to people who are amazing that I might not have met through any other means.  Plus, as an organizer, I'm assured of being able to do the activities I want to do. :) ).
Just my $.02.
Jennifer Godoi

--- On Sat, 11/29/08, Kath <[address removed]> wrote:
From: Kath <[address removed]>
Subject: [movies-307] Movie Meet-up
To: [address removed]
Date: Saturday, November 29, 2008, 9:17 PM

I first joined the Movie Meet-up group in August because I'd just moved to the area and I wanted to meet like-minded people. Wow, a movie group - how cool!
I went to the first meet-up and there were only three other people there, including Tim and Willie. We watched the movie and then, in the lobby, everyone walked away with "Bye, thanks for coming!" Huh? What was the point of that? I thought we were going to sit down and discuss the movie. Apparently not. Very disappointing.
But I decided to stick with it.
Went to my second meet-up. Lots more people showed but I ended up sitting next to a guy who would NOT shut up about himself. Sheesh! After the movie, some people talked about going out to dinner. I said, "Hey, I'd like to come too." Turned to pick up my purse and they were gone.
Figured I'd try one last time. Went to a meet-up, lot of people showed up and we all went to lunch afterwards. I had a blast. The people were fun. This was what I expected of the meet-up!
But apparently I said something wrong. Instead of dealing with it at the time, Willie sent me a long, angry e-mail the next day, chewing me out all because of a chance comment I made.
I decided to be nice about it and apologized for upsetting her. She replied with a very stiff acceptance. I chose to come to another meet-up.
Again, a good sized group of people and we went to dinner afterwards, but because of the previous incident, I wasn't as relaxed so I didn't truly enjoy myself. I decided to wait a month or two before going back to see if things calmed down.
Since then, we have had the group-wide e-mail from Willie regarding some people's complaints about a last-minute change of plans. Willie's solution was to tell people to check their e-mails more frequently and to stop being crybabies. I was glad that I was staying away for a while.
And now this. Willie, probably a lot of people signed up for Four Christmases because it looks like a good movie, but they didn't realize at the time of their RSVP that it was the holiday weekend. Many people probably cancelled due to choosing to spend time with their families. Your response was to once again yell at the group in bold font. Your approach to this group is militant and dictatorial and I find you a little too abrasive.
It's a MOVIE!!! Flickering lights on a screen that tell an entertaining story. Sheesh, get over yourself.
While I appreciate that being an organizer is truly hard work, I also realize that to be the leader of such a diverse group of people requires flexibility and a thick skin. Willie, you have neither.
I am dropping out of this meet-up group. Fun shouldn't be this tense.
-Kath Laffan

--- On Fri, 11/28/08, Awilda (aka Willy) <[address removed]> wrote:
From: Awilda (aka Willy) <[address removed]>
Subject: [movies-307] Meetup Cancelled: Four Christmases @ 7:15 p.m.
To: [address removed]
Date: Friday, November 28, 2008, 6:32 PM

Three days ago there were 17 "YES" RSVPs to the movie "Four Christmases." Unfortunately, the count decreased dramatically - mostly today - and it is now under five RSVPs. For this reason, I have decided to cancel it.

Effective immediately, please be aware that any movies I host will be cancelled if the RSVPs are five or less.

FYI - I arranged this event today at the request of two members that (1) picked the movie and (2) location, but unfortunately were unable to attend and let me know just an hour ago.

Four Christmases @ 7:15 p.m., scheduled to occur on November 28,[masked]:15 PM has been cancelled.
Please update your plans accordingly.

If you have further questions, you can email me through the "Contact Organizer" link on Meetup:

Please Note: If you hit "REPLY", your message will be sent to everyone on this mailing list ([address removed])
This message was sent by Awilda (aka Willy) ([address removed]) from Dallas Movie Fans.
To learn more about Awilda (aka Willy), visit his/her member profile
To unsubscribe or to update your mailing list settings, click here

Meetup Support: [address removed]
632 Broadway, New York, NY 10012 USA

Please Note: If you hit "REPLY", your message will be sent to everyone on this mailing list ([address removed])
This message was sent by Kath ([address removed]) from Dallas Movie Fans.
To learn more about Kath, visit his/her member profile
To unsubscribe or to update your mailing list settings, click here

Meetup Support: [address removed]
632 Broadway, New York, NY 10012 USA

People in this
Meetup are also in:

Sign up

Meetup members, Log in

By clicking "Sign up" or "Sign up using Facebook", you confirm that you accept our Terms of Service & Privacy Policy