Re: [ljc] Fwd: Part 2: Developer Stress

From: Ged B.
Sent on: Wednesday, February 15, 2012 9:52 AM
Slightly disappointed that you didn't do it in character as the Diabolical Developer.

Meeting deadlines.

Where's the stress?  There's never any risk of meeting deadlines.

To make sure I don't start until the day after it was due and then I take my time.  When everybody is waiting for you to deliver your code it reminds them of just how important you are.  

They'll say "do you need us to allocate some more resources to help you finish quicker."  

Then you get to throw a copy of Brook at them and shout "RTFM!  Do you know nothing about software development!  Only I am capable of writing this code - alone!"

Eventually they'll learn to manage their own expectations.

Application Performance

I write all my code in x86 assembler to it couldn't possibly be any faster.

Is my code good enough

Of course it is.  Since you can't read a thing I write you'll have to take my word for it.

What new stuff do you need to learn

Absolutely nothing.  I haven't learnt anything new since 1998 and I'm still being interviewed by idiots like you because I'm so damn clever.

Did I do X in the best way

That's an easy one.  Take a look at how I did it.  If you did it differently then you didn't do it the best way.

On 8 February[masked]:17, Martijn Verburg <[address removed]> wrote:
Hi all,

<part blatant plug>The folks at Zero Turnaround were expounding on their recent developer survey results on developer stress and were foolish enough to grab some of my opinions<\part blatant plug>

So this got me thinking, do you think there are London specific developer stresses?

Curious to hear any thoughts.


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