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Introduce Yourself, and tell us what you write!

A former member
Post #: 4
Thanks, Hilary!
Cjad E.
Cjad
Minneapolis, MN
Post #: 84
Andrew - I am also a programmer for a large corporation. ;) Welcome aboard!
Nancy - Welcome back to the world of the active! :)
Happy writing.
-Cjad
Eric
user 4719698
Inver Grove Heights, MN
Post #: 1
I just can't do any sort of generic first, intro post... so here goes (I hope there's no word limit)

1983: Michael Jackson's Thriller cemented its epic domination of the music charts, Bjorn Borg retires from tennis after 5 Wimbledon championships, M*A*S*H ends it's 11 year TV run, McDonald's introduces the McNugget, and Eric is born.

Eighth son of immigrant soy bean farmers from French Polynesia, Eric soon discovered he wasn't like the rest of his family. He was able to read, count, and fire lasers out of his finger tips that could burn through steel and smelled faintly of jasmine. With these abilities and his father's blessing following the ritualistic trail of manhood consisting of wrestling and pinning a 400 lbs boar, Eric left his family to search for his calling.

Shortly there after, at age 4 Eric happened upon what would be characterized as a "dive bar" in south east Kansas. He made a living there as a bus boy and by picking the pockets of discarded jeans while patrons enjoyed the company of the local prostitutes. Once, while doing so, the patron in question turned out to be reputed Kansas mobster William "Bruises" Catonee (nicknamed "bruises" because it was well known William got queasy at the site of blood and would insist on not breaking the skin of those he was extorting protection money from). William turned out to be well versed in mobster scenario cliché and felt that Eric was a "kid" who had "moxie" and "spunk" and so proceeded to have him run small errands for the mob.

This position lasted well into Eric's teenage years with brief periods where he was lent to mob chains in other states in part due to the whole lasers thing. Shortly after turning 18, a local physician and stunt pilot named Cassandra fell for Eric after a 1 week courtship. She insisted they run away together to New York. They attempted to do this but ran into trouble because of a lost map, excessive drinking, and a geographically unique, almost continuous slight downward slope towards Wisconsin.

Three months later Cassandra left Eric for a chance to be a cheerleader for the Toronto Raptors. Eric went on to graduate from UW-Madison, move to the Twin Cities area, join the work-force and live a somewhat eccentric lifestyle as a "young professional."

--
That being said, my goals in writing are two fold. I'm an amatuer stand-up comedian and am trying to work with satire, wit, and humor to build a rediculously awesome 60 minute routine. I also enjoy sci-fi/fantasy and would like to experiement with a story line I came up with and try to turn it into a book within a year or two. I found this group as I searched of people of similar interest both to befriend and to use so as to not repeat common mistakes of naive, novice writers. I hope that's cool.
Hilary Moon M.
Hilary
Group Organizer
Minneapolis, MN
Post #: 8,725
Eric --

He was able to read, count, and fire lasers out of his finger tips that could burn through steel and smelled faintly of jasmine.

Excellent! You'll have to show us your laser shooting trick at our next Meetup. The Lunds meeting room could use a little jasmine scent to freshen it up. Welcome to our group. Your introduction will be hard to follow, but I am sure that a number of our members will try, anyway.

Hmm
A former member
Post #: 1
I know I should come up with some impressive means of introduction but in all things I am a rather simple guy.

My name's Mike and I like to tell stories.

I guess it was about two years ago that I actually started writing stories. I was sitting at the Oakland airport waiting for my flight while I chatted on the phone with my buddy Eric:

Me: "I hate my job."

Eric: "Everyone hates their job."

Me: "But I REALLY hate my job. I dream about work now. Honest to god, I close my eyes to go to sleep and I'm at work again. Last night I dreamt about doing my expense report."

Eric: "So find a new job."

Me: "I don't see how that would help. Wherever I go, there's going to be expense reports to do. They've become the modern day equivalent of the Spanish Inquisition. Either I do the paperwork or I'm excommunicated from the business world."

Eric: "You're being stupid."

Me: "I just wanna be a writer."

Eric: "So write something."

And like that I knew he was right. All the great writers I had ever read had one thing in common; they wrote stuff. If I ever wanted to join their ranks I was going to have to bite the bullet and start doing the same.

My first story, started that night at the Oakland International Airport, turned out to be a tale about a guy who hated his job so much he realized it would be all together better for him to quit working so he had time to focus on going insane.

By the time I was done with the story everything had worked out so well for my main character (he died in a tragic car wreck, several times actually) I decided I might as well give unemployment and insanity a go for a while. I quit my job, sold my house, packed everything up in the car, and became a traveling minstrel.

It might suprise you to know that I've been referred to as somewhat of an extremist in the past.

I followed up my first story with a sequel (actually it was a prequel but since it was written to be read after the original the naming is somewhat ambiguous) that is finished save a few loose ends.

My next tale was supposed to be a cynical but non-fictional account of my life in Corporate America but in writing it I realized I was forced to think about WORK all the time and to be honest, the was really the last thing I felt like doing right at that moment so I scrapped the project all together and moved on to Mutant Bunnies From Outer Space.

The whole thing came about as a joke when my girlfriend (at the time, before I realized she wanted to steal my soul by way of marriage and children) asked me what I was going to work on next.

"A story about impotent bunnies from outer space that are invading Earth to steal our Viagra." I replied casually. "I'm gonna call it Hare Raiser."

It was a joke - 700 pages - Half a million words - Three separate books - but a joke none the less.

By the time I finally finished that, I was ready for something different, something fresh, so I moved onto Atlantis, my current project.

I know, Atlantis is grossly overdone by author's across the world but I am just an aspiring writer so I don't have any qualms seeking refuge in the fertile fields of an already established genre. My spin on the subject is being built around the work of Edgar Cayce's visions of Atlantis that he conjured as a psychic during the early part of the 20th century.

Cayce's past life readings painted a vivid picture of an Atlantean civilization that has such depth and detail it's hard to imagine it not serving as the backdrop to my fictional tale. Unfortunately, unlike my previous stories, the words for this one have been incredibly hard to find. Every now and then I sputter out a few paragraphs but the story thus far has steadfastly refused to write itself.

Since the most common question writer get asked is "Have you had anything published yet?" I guess I should just address that here and now.

No.

First and foremost, I'm a great story teller but a horrible writer. I dropped out of school in ninth grade and never really got the hang of this whole grammar thing. I make up my own rules of diction and really have to think to avoid using 'THAN' as something other than just a fancy way of spelling 'THEN'.

When I quit my job I set aside enough money to take five years off of work so I could eventually learn how to write, not necessarily to write anything so deeply profound that it would ever gain a broad audience. So while I hope to get published at some point, I still have a couple of years left to hone my art before subjecting myself to the potentially depressing prospect of having a publisher tell me I never should have quit my day job.

Anyway, I know this is a long post but I do like to type...

Mike
Nolan P.
Nolan_Peterson
Duluth, MN
Post #: 1
I suppose I should use my inaugural post to introduce myself. I know I am not the first person to say this, but at this particular juncture, I always feel like I am at an alcoholics anonymous meeting.

I am 25 years old, and I don't live in the cities, I live in Duluth, so it will be difficult to get to meetups, but I promise, I will when I can.

I spent four years in the Marine Corps. Two and a half of those years were spent in different countries.

Upon exiting the Marine Corps I decided I needed a career that would allow me to write. I started college last year working towards a major in print journalism. I am happy to say (warning: Own Horn Tooting Ahead) that I made it onto the Deans List both semesters. ( a smart Marine, Oh my...)

It is in my heart to write and so in my free time I do just that. Write.

It would be nice to get some honest criticism. What I don't want is for people to read my stuff and say, "oh it was wonderful I really enjoyed it" Don't get me wrong, I love it when people like what I write, but what I need is for someone who knows what they are talking about to say: "you could make it" or else: " are you sure you want to write books?"

I'm sure if my writing sucks, someone will have the heart to put me out of my misery. In the mean time, lets have fun!
Hilary Moon M.
Hilary
Group Organizer
Minneapolis, MN
Post #: 8,790
Welcome Michael and Nolan!

It is a pleasure to have you both join. I hope that you enjoy the group a lot.

Hmm
Jaye L.
JayeLawrence
Saint Paul, MN
Post #: 412
Welcome to our newest members! I hope we'll have a chance to meet in person at one of the upcoming events. In the meantime, it's great to make your virtual acquaintance. smile
Cjad E.
Cjad
Minneapolis, MN
Post #: 100
Welcome to the group, Michael and Nolan!
Happy writing!
-Cjad
Nolan P.
Nolan_Peterson
Duluth, MN
Post #: 17
Thank you Jaye and Cjad. Everyone here is very nice, and welcoming, I cant wait to make it to a meetup so I can meet you all in person!
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