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Guidelines for a Happy Poly Life

PERSONAL GOALS AND GUIDELINES FOR A HAPPY POLY LIFE
by Pete Mosq


1) Love, Lust, and Passion may be infinite, but time, energy and resources are not. Wasting the latter will greatly diminish pursuit of the former.

2) Be Honest with yourself. It’s the only way to be honest with others. Someone who does not appreciate honesty and candor is not someone you really want to be involved with anyway.

3) Set your boundaries and respect others’ also. A little self-awareness goes along way. By the time you get hit with the clue-by-four, the damage may be done.

4) Drama is a life and soul sucking vortex. Avoid it whenever possible. This is done in 2 ways.

  • Do your best to reduce the amount of drama causing people in your life. This can be difficult at first, but after a while you get the hang of it.
  • Do your best to reduce the amount of drama YOU CAUSE. This is much harder than the first part, but also achievable. See point’s 2 & 3 for reference.


    5) Be aware how you are expending your resources. Avoid wasting valuable time and energy in pursuit of those uninterested, unwilling, or unable to reciprocate no matter how desirable you find them to be. When in doubt, see point #1.

    6) Slow the heck down will yah?! You can’t stop and smell the flowers if you are too busy trampling over them. Fate has a way of working things out, and will do so in its own time no matter how much you run around chasing your tail (and expending energy needlessly). Fate, occasionally, could use a nudge, and sometimes even a big push. Use caution however, because Fate knows how to push back. Hard.

    7) When you fall and embarrass yourself (and you will sometimes), pick yourself up and move on. Everybody does, you are not alone. Use your experience to recognize your mistakes when you make them again and maybe even avoid them entirely!

    8) Regardless of the outcome of any situation, if you conduct yourself with honor and integrity no one can take that away from you.


    Copyright © 2008 Pete Mosq

    Standard Disclaimer: The Goals and Guidelines list and content included in this handout are MY OPINION based on my own experience and education on the subject. Please bear that in mind when utilizing this or any other tools, and always remember YMMV (Your Mileage May Vary). Use your judgement and common sense, and be careful out there!

    Questions, comments, ideas, and feedback are welcome.
    Email: TESMosq@aol.com
    Blog: http://petemosq.livej...
    I can be found on the web elsewhere under my name.


    How the list started:
    While pursuing the pleasures and pitfalls of polyamorous relationships, I wrote this guide up for myself. I posted it on my blog and to a few poly communities and was overwhelmed by the response. People were inspired to make their own lists and set expectations for their relationship goals. Some of these ideas were gathered from the various resources (books, websites, etc) with a good deal of personal experience thrown in. The goal of this is to share my experience with you and inspire you to make your own list for your Happy Poly Life. :-)

    Why make a list?
    Polyamorous relationships are by nature self-defining and different for everyone. Stating your goals, wants, needs and expectations will help you realize, prioritize, and maximize your relationships

    So What’s on Your List?


    Personal Goals and Guidelines for My Happy Poly Life.

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  • Table of Contents

    Page title Most recent update Last edited by
    Guidelines for a Happy Poly Life May 31, 2010 10:31 AM anonymous
    Unmasking the Green-Eyed Monster May 10, 2010 6:00 PM anonymous
    Never Do this: Poly Mistakes May 10, 2010 5:19 PM anonymous
    Transitioning from Cheating to Polyamory May 10, 2010 4:20 PM anonymous
    A Crazy Little Thing Called... May 10, 2010 4:10 PM anonymous
    What your poly-mono partner wants you to know May 10, 2010 4:02 PM anonymous
    Poly for the Mono: You've Fallen for a poly person May 10, 2010 3:52 PM anonymous
    Polyamory for the Monogamous: Making it work May 10, 2010 3:33 PM anonymous
    About Polyamory Ireland Discussion/Support Group May 10, 2010 2:54 PM anonymous

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