Nother critique group. All welcome, check the comments trail for how to bring work, and how to read other people's work.
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Fi, some trivia -- I have been member of the club since it opened and there were no crows then. Only about ten years ago they were introduced into the Dubai fauna either accidentally or maliciously. And as we wind up for the day after a round of golf the scene you describe is raucously incongruous. .......The piece can do with some tightening of the lines (e.g. crockery and cutlery are not needed; just the clatter of cutlery conveys poetic mood). The 'gravelly Hispanic' jangles - almost bigotry. It can only mean boors in this context since they also indulge in cruel sport of scaring the birds. Just use the names, maybe even typically British. That will do fine.
0 · November 29, 2012
Next one here: http://www.meetup.com/dubaiwriters/events/92687732/
0 · November 25, 2012
Just posted 'The Grapes of Math'; not much time to review it I know but as ever I've kept it pithy.
0 · November 20, 2012
Pithy, eh? Only the sugarcane chewer knows it. "not much to review" -- is that Klingon for don't review?
An etymology trivia -- pith generally means the fibrous tissue in plants that holds the essence (juice). After extraction (as in sugar cane) the pith is discarded. Growing up in India in days of 'yore' (- from 'Friends' the TV serial) we used to buy sugar cane to tear the skin with our front teeth and then bite chunks and chew out the juice until every drop was out and spat the pith. Explains strong teeth with all that calcium. Pith is a waste ( as in pith helmets). So how did it evolve to mean the "essence" or the core of the matter?
But the fibrous tissue that connects things and keeps it together _is_ its essence. It also used to mean the spinal chord in a human or animal for the same reason, it's the strong core that held it together.
0 · November 21, 2012
Pith is probably a derivation from pit and in most cases the pit holds the DNA of the fruit. Hence pithy meaning the "what is left after the chaff is blown away" usage. In most writing there is a lot of chaff to be blown away. In almost all cases pith is discarded and burned as in sugarcane pith which fires the boilers of sugar factories. There the "essence" is juice aka sugar. Anyone willing to dig deeper?
Hi Fiona, let us milk the cow and forget the fruit, to mix metaphors. There isn't time to do a line edit but briefly: whisky-soda/G&T/screw driver/rum and coke all yield a 4-6% net alcohol. So lets give the wine drinkers a heave-ho. Jokes aside, although the concept is a non-starter, why not a spritzer? (Blasphemy?) ...The piece meanders too much and could do with reducing bracketed asides and further, since the title promises humour take out the self-defence and add elements of an essay. More when we meet at the next conclave.
0 · November 22, 2012
Okay so for the 24th:
1. Two against Thebes pt12. The Raven3. Zitgeist4. The Grapes of Math
It's alright by me, but I can't speak for the other people who might need time to read. :)
Generally the more time I have to think about a piece, the better feedback I can give.
Heidi, uploaded some comments.
0 · November 15, 2012
have uploaded a poem The Raven
0 · November 11, 2012
Mithun, uploaded comments on the Raven. Just don't say Nevermore.
Uploaded my submission: http://files.meetup.com/192477/two%20against%20thebes%20p1.doc
Part 1 of a novella. It's far too long to bring the whole thing, so doing it piecemeal.
1 · November 11, 2012
File uploading: Go to http://www.meetup.com/dubaiwriters/files/edit/ , upload your file, MAKE SURE you set it for ONLY MEMBERS OF THIS MEETUP GROUP.
Then post a link or notice in this comments trail to say you've done it. You will be able to find other people's work listed here: http://www.meetup.com/dubaiwriters/files/
1) If you want to bring something for us to critique, please upload it about a week ahead of time. That gives us a chance to read it and form our thoughts.
2) We will try to get to everyone's, but if we have too many, some may get bumped to the next meeting. If you upload early you'll probably get priority.
3) Please read/DL stuff ahead of time! If you don't have time that's still alright, no reason you can't come, but please read the comments trail, as in about a week I'll post the list of what we'll be reading/critiquing, I'd like people to have mostly read everyone else's.
4) Please don't let this scare you out of posting something, or coming. ^^ These rules are just to help make sure everyone gets a fair shake.
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