Authentic Happiness - Part III

From: Janardhan
Sent on: Sunday, June 2, 2013 9:02 PM
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Greetings from Peace Village, NY!
Being in the presence of the spiritual grand master Dadi Janki is a powerful experience. At age 97, she continues to infuse thousands around the world the art of recreating the original purity of the soul and a tireless ethic of service.

The tip I got from her today, to be light and carefree one needs honesty and be loving.

Some interesting events later this month at the Anubhuti Retreat Center:
Circle of Wise Women with Arlene Samen from One Hearth World-wide on June 9th
Men's Wisdom Circle with Soren Gordhamer of Wisdom 2.0 on June 15th
A Future Without Fear with Janardhan on June 22nd

Below is the final part of the series on authentic happiness.

Peace & blessings,

The Natural State of Happiness

Last week, we looked at some of the toxins that pollute our state of 'natural happiness'.  These toxins are known as 'beliefs'.  It is a variety of 'toxic beliefs' that underlie the habit of creating 'false happiness'.  There are seven toxic beliefs that have established themselves within our consciousness, three of which were covered last week.  These are popular toxins that we all tend to have absorbed, mostly when we were young.  Here are the last four of those beliefs. See if you recognize them within your self.

Toxic Belief No 4 - Happiness is dependent on others

We all know the moment when we have said, "I was so happy when you said that!  You made me so happy."  But did they?  Does someone else make you happy?  It seems that way.  And that's what most of us have been taught.  We forget that we are ourselves responsible for our own state of being therefore our state of happiness.  When we make our feelings dependent on what other people say and their behavior towards us it's probably one of the hardest toxins to eliminate from our consciousness.  One question can start the process of self liberation: who exactly is responsible for my personal happiness?   Can you be contented no matter what anyone says or does?  If not, why not?  What is it within us that is so reliant on what others say and do?  Perhaps another useful question for reflection is what 'seems' to be missing within us?  What is clouding our awareness of our natural contentment?

The coaching questions for self reflection:  Who are you dependent upon in your life to make you happy?    Make a list.  Then ask your self do they really make me happy.  Are they really responsible for my happiness?

Toxic Belief No 5 -  Happiness is the result of attachment

"That's mine, they are mine, this is my house, my car, my money, my partner, my children".  These are usually moments when we are really saying we need to be attached to these things in order to be happy.  How do we know that all 'mineness', all attachment, will bring unhappiness?  Because there will be frequent moments of anxiety, tension, worry and even panic as we 'fear' losing what we are attached to.  Each of those moments are unhappy moments. It's just that we somehow learn to tolerate such feelings and even start to believe they are 'natural'.   We might even go to the horror movie, have feelings of fear invoked, and then call it happiness when we tell others about how great the movie was! 

The coaching questions for self reflection:  What am I attached to which I believe is giving me happiness?    Make a list.  Then ask your self are you sure they make me happy and could I be happy without them?  If not why not?

Toxic Belief No 6 - Happiness is relief from pain or suffering

Perhaps the most common confusion around happiness is when some pain or suffering ends and we say, "I am so happy the pain has gone".  However pain relief can never be authentic happiness, only a temporary relief from unhappiness.  Authentic happiness is only possible when we are able to accept the inevitability of physical pain and when we have realized and applied the wisdom to not create any more suffering.  Pain is physical, which is why it will inevitably happen at some stage.  But suffering is mental and emotional which is always entirely our own creation.  It's just that we find it hard to see through the mists of the primary illusion that other people are responsible for our feelings.  When we do it marks the beginning of the end of our 'suffering', which is in effect the ending of unhappiness.

The coaching questions for self reflection:  What forms of pain am I looking forward to ending so that I can be happy?  Is there a list?  Can you decide to accept the pain here in this moment now?  Can you discern how you make your self suffer?

Toxic Belief No 7 - Happiness is only possible when there is success

Brilliantly conditioned to believe that the world and life is innately competitive, many of us then form the belief that success equals winning.  That could, and usually does, include winning our survival!  So we live in fear of losing, fear of not surviving, which creates many unhappy moments.  Then we start to compare our successfulness against others successes, inducing more unhappy moments!

Trying to be more successful today than yesterday, more successful than others, is what turns life into an ultra serious journey, a joyless expedition, a discontented sojourn.  You only have to look at the faces of our so called sporting heroes as they participate in their games in the name of 'success' to see the total absence of a natural and authentic happiness.  Yet we believe that their success brings them so much happiness!  Then we start to believe that the pain of all the strain is the only way to success and therefore happiness.  So we start to make our selves extremely unhappy in order to be happy!

You can only laugh...when you see it in this light!

The coaching questions for self reflection:  What kind of successes am I striving towards in the belief they will bring me happiness?    Make a list.  Then ask your self are you sure they will bring you real, authentic, natural happiness? If not why not?

There are probably many more than seven toxic beliefs contaminating our consciousness and sabotaging our natural state of contentment, our pure joyfulness, our original bliss.  But recognizing them, and realizing how they are inducing feelings of discontent, joylessness and frequent moments of grumpiness is the first step in the purification of our consciousness.  Just as we value pure water over contaminated water so the spiritual process of the purification of our consciousness includes the elimination of the toxins that have been absorbed along the way. 

The questions provide reflective signposts that we can use to deepen our awareness.  However, equally necessary is time spent in a deeper state of consciousness.  It's in moments of meditation that it's possible to touch and taste our original and unpolluted state of being.  The more we do the easier it becomes to recognize, extract and eliminate anything that pollutes that state. 

©  Mike George 2013
Copyright © 2013 Brahma Kumaris, All rights reserved.
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