Initially, you may find the meetup process a bit intimidating. Afterall, it can seem a bit strange to meetup with people you've never met before and say "Hi, I'm Jane and I need some friends." At your first couple of events, it can seem overwhelming trying to catch a few basics about the women with whom you're chatting much less feel like you're forming any kind of real friendship.
Until we get more organizers for our group to help fill our calendar, you may find that our events are so far apart (or at least the ones that you're able to attend are far apart), you may wonder how you can possibly develop new, close friendships with other members of our group. Here are a few useful tips.
Be friendly to everyone, but don't feel you have to get to know everyone at an event
Although it might seem like you should try to chat up everyone at an event, you may find that the group is too large or the setting isn't conducive to chatting with everyone. Instead, you might want to be friendly with everyone, but focus on getting know a few members better by trying to quickly passing through the standards (name, occupation, relationship status, hometown) and start looking for areas of common interest such as hobbies & favorite leisure activities.
Make a plan to "meetup" outside formal group activities
Before you leave your first event, give your email address/cell phone number to someone you enjoyed talking to and make plans to grab lunch one day or take in a movie. This is a really good way to get to know our members better. Also remember, the point of the group is not to just do things as a group, but to develop a network of friends that you can hang out with outside of our scheduled events.
Keep coming to events
With other meetup groups, one of the comments often heard when people first attend an event is that "everyone seems to know each other" which can make a new member feel like a bit of an outsider. Although our group has been around for more than 18 months, we haven't yet developed a large core of regulars, and so you are unlikely to have this experience at a Girls Night Out event - yet - but I have great hopes that as our group develops and grows, we are going to start forming friendships between members. With a large and active group and it it will takes time to get to know everyone. The best way to do this is to keep coming.
A second reason to keep coming to events is that with our smaller event attendance, you may not initially find anyone with whom you feel that you truly hit it off. It may seem like everyone is too young, too old, too married, etc. but with a group our size, the demographics of the attendees can be VERY different from event to event. I've had women in their 40s and 50s tell me that the group is nice, but the members seem too young (because our 40+ members make up a smaller percentage of the total group) but then I've attended dinner events where ALL of the attendees were in their 40's and 50's and I was the only one in her 30's.
The only way you're going to meet other women who can relate to your current position on the social-lifespan timeline is by attending as many events as possible. Come with an open mind and enjoy meeting new people, regardless of age or other demographics factors. With a group as large as ours, a little effort and openness will lead to you meeting new local friends with whom you will develop close friendships over time.
Take advantage of all three communication options == there are three primary means of communication between members:
|Page title||Most recent update||Last edited by|
|Children and Y-chromosomes at events||August 25, 2009 6:12 PM||former member|
|GNO membership guidelines||June 13, 2010 6:39 AM||former member|
|Meetup to make new friends||May 31, 2008 8:52 PM||former member|
|Meet Our Organizers||February 21, 2010 8:53 AM||former member|
|About Girls Night Out||November 5, 2009 12:36 PM||former member|