Past Meetup

The Public Affair: Are Special Interest Events a Necessary Evil? Just Evil?! :)

This Meetup is past

9 people went


Great and interesting discussions from the Private Affair so far. The concerns seem on

1) feeling rejected, left out, and hurt if events are allowed to be focusing on a specific interest (or “fetish”) which may be perceived as being narrow minded, self-serving, sexist, racist, or of prejudices, etc, and

2) how implementable can such events be if people who RSVP and even show up are not whom you are looking for.

My current thoughts/questions below. Please note my questions are empathic and probing as I am trying to understand better so that we hopefully can be on the same page. They are by no means threatening or even challenging. And please feel free to correct me if I am wrong.

1) Such special interest events are additions to the current all-welcome events. And such all-welcome events will still continue. They may compete against each other for some participants if both are on at the same time but other than that, they each offer creativity and variety to members.

2) Why should we feel rejected and hurt about these special interest events?

3) Why should we feel the group is not for me if both all-welcome and special interest events are allowed?

4) Why cannot Deb use EOO to host a Wednesday at Deb’s for left hanging non-Asian men between 25 and 35? Why should I feel rejected?

5) Is it okay if a couple posts at EOO looking for a single white female, or 2 black hung men? And what if 5 RSVP and 3 or 0 show up at the door?

6) In general, should we allow controversial events to be posted, knowing number of attendees is probably the best indicator to their popularity and anyone in their citizen’s consciousness can report to police for unlawful events?

7) Although we can suggest to people of special interests to set up their own meetup groups (as I almost said so to people with tattoos and piercings!), shouldn’t we allow them to post at EOO as our willingness and ability to be inclusive?