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Discussion and Social Night

I am setting up a series of bi-weekly (first and third Thursday of each month) discussion and social nights for the Ethical Open community. The venue is suggested and selected for its upscale decor and ambience conducive to discussions. Your suggestions for similar or better venues of quietness in a relatively central location are much appreciated. Did I say quiet? :)

I suggest that we have a discussion theme for each event but any topic of interest can still be raised and talked about. Here is my first attempt of some themes and the dates. Your suggestions are welcome.

September 8: What is polyamory?

September 22: What is jealousy? How to deal with it?

October 6: What is Non-Violent Communication?

October 20: Should marriage be registered by private entities instead of by the Government? Should marriage be upgraded, or cancelled?

November 3: Polyamory case studies

November 17: Relationship bills of rights

December 8: What is solo-poly, mono-poly?

To attract the great opposable minds for robust discussions, here are my opening gambits for the events:

Monogamy’s divorce rate in North America is about 50%, or higher if distressed couples are counted.

Break-up rate in non-monogamy is unknown but could be even higher.

The issue seems less about the forms of union but more about how we relate to one another or to ourselves (in the case of solo’s approaches). That’s also what this group is about:

- To explore relationship fundamentals, and provide a space for members to relate in a community. If we can dream about a world of harmonious and happy relationships, even better.

Along with such a goal, the following pre-requisites to relationships are suggested as guiding principles (and your inputs are welcome):

-  Be ethical, open, honest, respectful, and kind

-  Follow the “Platinum Rule”: treat others the way they would like to be treated;

-  Be empathic, and do no harm physically or mentally.

Although hookups, friends with benefits, or casual sex on consensual basis may have positive effects, the group is about overall considerations and not about a single aspect of needs. Hope this clarifies.

One more thing about a discussion approach: views are often based on assumptions. When you feel uncomfortable or disagree with someone's view, chances are that you have a different assumption/perspective. It may be more productive to voice your perceived assumption of that person and offer your own assumption and reasoning so that we can explore the deeper issues at stake. Respecting someone does not necessarily mean to be polite and silent since you consider everyone has the right/freedom to voice one's views. Respectfully voicing your own assumptions and views in a discourse with that person may likely lead to a more robust form of engagement, mutual respect, and civic life.

Enjoy your discussions and good life!

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  • Rocky S.

    Such wonderful people with intelligent minds and abundance of humor and wits. I am proud to be a part of you all and would continue to be forever.
    Mr Wei you have to start organising it on a weekly basis my friend !!!

    6m ago

  • Bill B.

    Thank you for organizing a wonderful meeting

    1 · 17m ago

  • Sheri

    Sorry. I had a late meeting and not able to attend.

    4h ago

  • Lisa

    I wanted to attend but life has just gotten crazy and I won't be able to. Have a great evening!

    2 days ago

  • Wei

    This Thursday's discussion topic is on mono/poly relationship. I will bring some slides based on the book More Than Two to look at the assumptions, the challenges, and strategies of each. Feel free to attend and discuss. We will leave time for socialize as well.

    I have booked the room on the second floor, which can seat about 8 people. If you cannot make it, please kindly update your attendance. Thanks.

    1 · 3 days ago

  • Wei

    When Mike Batt wrote this beautiful Katie Melua song, he might never have thought that I would like to think it is so poly if the you in it is plural!

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=G6S6-xHq5oc

    November 27

  • Wei

    I changed the date to Dec 8 as I will be away next week. Please note the meetup is on the second floor of the pastry shop.

    November 24

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