Yesterday, I was warm and comfortable in a quiet southern town. This morning, I awoke in a northern, frost-covered meadow with no idea where I was or how I had come to be there. Well, I did have one idea. I suppose I was foolish to hope that Nindais was finished with me and that I could just get on with my life. But desperation does that--makes one cling to their desires no matter how unlikely it is for them to come to be. But it had been months since the last such… incident.
Worse than not knowing where I was was not knowing what I did. Did I kill another of Chailya's followers and collect another soul fragment? For a moment, I actually hoped I had, just to move this ordeal to its end. But one look at the rust-brown stains on Elldraxis and I found myself frantically cleaning the blade and whispering, "Please be dirt." I truly do not wish to take lives. But I am so tired of being the pawn… pawn of the nixies' bloodlust and cruel games… pawn of the seelie queen Rozleen… now the pawn of Nindais.
Bitch. The least she could do was drop my body off where she left it or somewhere warm. But… she did leave me less than a few hours walk from Haradare, a port city that attracts both honest merchants and smugglers, where I at last found a clue to her whereabouts; or rather a clue to a clue. And that's curious in itself… No one, anywhere, has seemed to know a thing about Nindais. It's as if all record of her has been wiped away and anyone with a memory of her has been silenced. And now she just happens to leave me in the one place that someone knows something? And we just happen to end up in the same pub? Of course, she wants to be free at least as much as I do.
It's just… to get the information, I have to… I don't trust Trellin, and it's not just because he calls me "Lady Bug," though, I'm writing that down to make sure I remember how much… regret… to visit upon him once he has served his purpose. This is the second time I've met him, and he feels… wrong. He wears the trappings of a pirate and acts like a smuggler. But that's not all. There is magic about him. If it wasn't for his tan skin and green eyes, I would say he "feels" like a drow. I suppose he could be glamoured, but to saunter about in broad daylight?
In any case, he claims to know someone who knows about Nindais. I couldn't penetrate whatever wards surrounded him to extract what he knew, but I believe he does know something. All he wants me to do is muck around in the mind of a merchant he ran afoul of a few months ago and tinker with his hostility toward him. All he wants me to do… toying with someone's mind is a tricky business. A wrong move can leave someone in a state worse than death. But Trellin seems to truly value this merchant. He just wants a certain unpleasantness cleaned up neatly. I guess that's why he came to me.
So that's where I am. Do I do this thing? Do I once again do another's bidding to try and free myself from the coils of fate? No one else seems able to help; not even the clan. Their light is bright and beautiful, and it warms me, but it can't keep me from slipping ever deeper into the looming darkness. Not that they wouldn't try. And that's another thing… Who do they think I am to extend me their friendship? They cannot see what writhes in my heart. A right merry band of misfits they are and I the shadowy misfit among them. Fools they are, and a fool am I. They are a distraction. My concern for them will be my bane. I am a survivor. I am used to doing things on my own…
Edited by Galatyne on Jan 28, 2016 5:49 AM