What we're about

My name is Phoenix Joe.

One of the biggest challenges I struggled in life was mastering and navigating issues around relationships and I am still on the journey of learning. I am talking about relationships of romantic kind, friendships, and parent-child; however, my main focus is on the romantic relationship as this is the one that gave me the most joy and heartache. Over two decades I sought answers from many sources, including psychology, neurobiology, evolutionary psychology, anthropology, faith traditions, and Korean folk wisdom. We are forming a discussion group to promote mutual learning, sharing and building a supportive community.

Will you join me in topical discussions covering questions and issues such as:

When is it time to let go, or double down?,

Three questions to ask before breaking up, and the tie-breaker question.

Three steps to moving on,

Biochemistry of love, and the bridge experiment,

Why you are much better off ending it with class and mindfulness,

Why every man is a multi-year DIY project; which ones are worth the investment?

What I learned about relationship success through flipping properties,

Lies men tell vs lies women tell,

Honesty is a cornerstone of a healthy relationship; lies are the lubricant moving it,

When honesty becomes selfish and burdening,

Is cheating ever ok or forgivable?,

Dating challenges for a smart sexy career woman who have it all,

Dating issues for a single mother who is a good catch,

No, you cannot have it all, but can you?,

Why online dating sucks, but can you still pick out gems from the crud?,

What women can learn from oyster hunters,

If he is on the fence about you today, wait till five years from now,

Why women can be converted over time, but why men cannot be,

Who pays, what is the split, take turns?,

Why you should give another chance to a date who did not offer to pay?

Can I date a man who makes less? Can I date a woman who I am having to pick up her tab often?

Masculine woman & feminine man relationship dynamics,

Divorce is ok, divorce saved my life,

Marriage sucks, get married anyways,

Alternative relationships,

The legacy of swinging and polyamory,

Do friends with benefits work?,

What sex means for man vs woman,

Am I with my soulmate?,

What are 2 things you can do for your man today that will have him speechless and almost tearful,

Why women get plenty of bad advice all the time and men get no advice,

Why men are hesitant to commit these days,

Why every woman needs 3 types of men in their life and what can you do to have them without cheating and hurting your partner,

How you are born to lose in relationships, but you are a winner,

In praise and criticism of Eat Pray Love,

Therapists vs coaches vs friends vs Cosmo magazine

Marriage in postmodernism age,

History of marriage, why this is the age with most challenges and yet it is also the age with the most potential for happy relationships,

Selling divorce to the West in the 60s, Now divorce is sold in the East, and Why?

History of romanticism and its legacy,

What I heard my Korean grandmother say to my sister, and why Oprah would not have invited her,

There are no simple answers, but I believe together we can shed some light on the issues and better equip ourselves for a relationship in the 21st century.

*Event fee of $5 cash will be collected at each discussion session.

*I have been writing about women's issues for about 10 years.


Membership Details:


A: In the topical discussions, I do my best to share authentically. I do my best to keep my egoic self in check and share thoughts that are authentic, and sometimes private in nature. I imagine some of you will share authentically as well, as authentic sharing in a mutually supportive and non-judgmental environment can be cathartic, healing, and empowering. For this reason, I think members prefer privacy.


A: The group discussion sessions are not meant as a replacement for qualified therapy sessions. You are strongly encouraged to seek services from a qualified mental health care professional if you are, or suspect you are suffering from mental health issues. Our discussions are NOT meant to solve mental health conditions.

This group is NOT a dating service. Please, no unsolicited email(s) to other members. If you feel uncomfortable with email(s) you received, PLEASE MESSAGE me so that I can address the problem properly.

Our meetings are meant to provide a safe space where participants can gain insights about relationships from their own sharing and sharing of others. We discuss psychology as it relates to relationship issues; hence there are no general discussions on mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety, etc.

We want to build a community where we feel supported amongst simpatico minds in life’s journey, as no matter who you are, relationships are challenging as heck from start to finish - finding, sorting through, starting, managing, repairing...


A: I went to UCLA for economics then USD law, then few others. I am retired from commercial real estate career. I am happily married to a professor who teaches Anthropology/Archaeology. I have a lovely four-legged daughter who reminds me every day how great life is. I failed many things in life, and relationships are the crown jewel of my anti-achievements in life. I am still learning and hopefully we can learn from each other.

Relationships hurt me badly at times but I am in a happy place now. I took several years to study, conducted interviews in various places in US, engaged in meaningful conversations, provided coaching services, wrote few books that are now looking like a stale pizza that needs to be reheated or be thrown away.


A: I worked as a relationship coach in the past. I wrote to help my clients. I write primarily for women’s issues because I had success in helping women but experienced little success in helping men. I am hoping to change that in future. I am currently working on two book projects. One of them is called – How to survive and thrive in a women’s world. I am hoping the project will culminate in a simple to read book that will be purchased by woman to be given as a present to her boyfriend or husband, and hopefully not both.


A: The default locations are in West GTA, namely Mississauga and Oakville. Right now I am considering meeting in North York and Etobicoke as well. Please email me if you are interested in having discussions in Etobicoke or North York.


A: Sometime things come up and we cannot make it to events we signed up. It happens to the best of us. However, we are adults and we are considerate of others. If you have 2 no shows without giving the event organizer notice before the event start time, and this happens within 6 months period, your membership will be revoked. If this happens, you are welcome to reapply.

Past events (2)

Many Faces of Infidelity (Part 1)

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Three questions to ask before breaking up

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