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The Southern California Polyamory Meetup Group Message Board The Southern California Polyamory Meetup Group Discussion Forum › Polyamory Reality Show - Discussion

Polyamory Reality Show - Discussion

Deborah
Angel_B
Group Organizer
Burbank, CA
Post #: 66
Please feel free to post your thoughts and concerns here. Remember to click the box below to "Track" the discussion if you want to keep updated with it.
Jim
PolyLover
Pasadena, CA
Post #: 3
I think that 'occupant' who sent the really negative response sounds super paranoid, and is reading a lot more into Nathalia's message than is actually there. My interpretation of what Nathalia wrote is that she is not really certain of the type(s) of relationships she is looking for, but is just laying out her thoughts, which are subject to change as she becomes more familiar with the subject. I do not think she is anti-men, as it seems that Occupant does, but is rather just against a mandatory patriarchal relationship. Her statement that "THERE IS AN HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE TO MONOGAMY!!" indicates to me that she is not stuck on a female dominant relationship, but only wants to portray a much more positive image for women in a Poly relationship. I think she might be very happy finding people whose relationships are more equality based, rather than having one dominant leader, either male or female. That is just my take on what she said. I certainly do not believe that any person should be condemned out of hand for stating what they are tentatively looking for, as Occupant did.

As for Nathalia joining the group, I have no problem with her being a member to help her clarify what she is after, as long as she agrees to not use anythins said, without first getting permission from whoever said it.

A former member
Post #: 3
I have no problem with her joining the group.

I do however have an issue with her only wanting to do a show where the Woman is 100% in charge in a Poly relationship. I think what makes a great relationship is equality between all those involved. In my relationship we are 100% equals. So I believe she should concentrate on positive Polyamorous relationship where all involved are equals.

If she wants to interview members about this I have no problem with it as long as the members agree to it. No photos or videos please as children and jobs may be at steak.

Thank you,

David
Midgey
user 9380902
Burbank, CA
Post #: 1
You know, I can see both sides of this issue (Occupant's and Jim's). The original message from Nathalia does sound very one-sided and I can certainly relate to the dominant male point she's trying to get away from. However, I do agree with Dave that Nathalia should be looking for a balanced relationship where neither male nor female is dominant overall.

Women are empowered when we're not made to submit (unwillingly) and when we hold our own by not being subservient in any relationship. We don't HAVE to be in charge to be empowered. We CAN be empowered when we are equals. If we have nothing to prove, we're that much more empowered because we don't have bones to pick with our partners.

Anyway, I don't mind her joining the group... so long as interviews with me are annonymous. ^_^
Deborah
Angel_B
Group Organizer
Burbank, CA
Post #: 67
She will know that no interviews are to take place without permission, nor will she be allowed to quote anything from the site without prior approval. I am still going to wait a few more days to let more people vote in the poll.

Also, There is a possibility she might want to attend the next meetup for a Q&A session. There is a possibility that the sex therapist they are working with, a woman named Janice who is in a tantric relationship might also be able to join her. Would this be ok with everyone?
Midgey
user 9380902
Burbank, CA
Post #: 2
I'll be unable to attend, as it's my weekend with the kids. But, it sounds like a great opportunity to have questions answered on both sides.
Deborah
Angel_B
Group Organizer
Burbank, CA
Post #: 68
Nathalia wanted to respond to everyone as she has been following the conversation, but because I have not yet added her as a member - pending the group conscience in the poll (click here) I put up, I am relaying her message for her :-)

I am not anti-men at all and I understand that there are many different dynamics in the Poly lifestyle. The reason I wish to have a female perspective on this lifestyle is a way to simply show society that women are just as strong and confident in multiple relationships as men are. We are always shown to be the weaker sex but in this case, it's not so. And that is one of the main reasons why. I am trying to make this sex positive while making it female positive - there is nothing derogatory about the woman's choice in choosing to have multiple partners. I would love the opportunity to speak to the group in an off-the-record type of capacity with no cameras or anything. Almost like a q&a session. And it would be a good opportunity to have everyone meet me and Janice at the same time.

Nathalia
Jim
PolyLover
Pasadena, CA
Post #: 4
I have been Poly for over 36 years, having much experience of my own, as well as from others, so I thought Natila might be interested in using me as a resource for her project. She was indeed interested and set up a meeting for today. I just got back from talking with Natilia, Janice and her husband, Danie'l, for a couple of hours. I think I may have just made three new friends, they are great people. I think it was a very interesting and productive meeting, which clarified exactly what they are wanting to do. We all seem to be on the same page with wanting to feature an equality based relationship, but from the female point of view, and empowering women. That is not to say that any men in the relationship are not also empowered, but that is not what needs to be focused on.

Natalia is not a newcomer to making reality shows as many are, but is rather well known in the business. She has a solid plan for creating the show, and I have no doubt that she will make it happen.

I highly recomend that all three of them be allowed to join the group. I am extremely confident that they are very respectful of everyone's privacy, and will not use anything without first getting specific permission. They would very much like to get together with a lot of us poly folks to discuss the project, answer questions, and handle any concerns, etc. To facilitate this, I will probably be setting up a Poly In The Park meeting at Farnsworth Park in Altadena sometime within the next couple of weeks.


A former member
Post #: 1

Also, There is a possibility she might want to attend the next meetup for a Q&A session. There is a possibility that the sex therapist they are working with, a woman named Janice who is in a tantric relationship might also be able to join her. Would this be ok with everyone?

I think that's a brilliant idea. It sounds like, based on Jim's post, that she comes across better in person than in text.
Deborah
Angel_B
Group Organizer
Burbank, CA
Post #: 69
OK, I will approve her membership today. As it stands, the poll is in her favor by a large margin.

12 OK to approve her
2 No
1 doesn't matter

Nathalia also knows that there is to be no unsolicited emailing of the members. I am going to make her an "event" organizer so she can plan a meetup revolving around the TV show. Her profile will also show that she is a TV Producer and any meetups she plans will be clearly marked as pertaining to the show so the members who DO want to participate can do so, and those that do not can opt out.

She might have some great contacts in the community for professionals, so keep a look out :-)

Deborah
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