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Re: [aspergers-406] Deborah added a post

From: dan
Sent on: Thursday, March 25, 2010 12:47 PM
The social thing is difficult even with old friends when your an Aspie....Dan

On Thu, Mar 25, 2010 at 6:03 AM, Carolyne Garman <[address removed]> wrote:
Deborah,

??All I can say is, "Wow," and yes, ?your Diana is wise beyond her years! I think my (probably Aspie son is, too.( He lives in Chicago.) ?I've learned a lot from ?you, and for that I am grateful.

Carolyne






on 3/24/10 6:174 PM, Deborah at [address removed] wrote:

Greetings all - I have had no "Yes" responses to our game night. ?This is the 2nd attempt for "game night". ?I will hold the place until April 2nd. ?If there is not an interest, we will cancel.
Now to some serious business. ?I have asked Diana two questions: 1) why she thinks we have not had a better response to our "game night". and 2)Why do we draw more neurotypicals to our meetups than adults with Asperger's. ???Diana is an adult with Asperger's, so her response comes from a different perspective than I am capable of seeing. ?Diana's answer is as follows: 1. Too Social ???2. Too many parents and/or caregivers ?and not enough Aspies ?3.Game night a bad idea (?) ?4.Fear - distrust of NTs. ?Too many NTs. ?5. Scope of group's mission statement too broad. Can either educate NTs OR provide support for Aspies, but NOT do both well ?6. Keep one consistent night and time. If people want to come, they will find a way. ??7. Build a routine location. ?NTs need variety - Aspies crave consistency. ??8. Build a social structure (ie: a schedule of events). ?We (Aspies) can't intuit, but we do well if we know EXACTLY what is expected of us. ?9)Off-putting to Aspies to hear people (usually NTs) say what's different or "wrong" with us. ?We already know this. It's also somewhat insulting that NTs need help "dealing" with what makes us unique.
I think Diana is wise beyond her years and that she has some EXCELLENT points here. ?The group was ORIGINALLY designed for Aspies. ?But, with each meeting, less and less Aspies are showing up and more and more NTs are showing up. ?I would like to help Diana revamp this support group that is more geared towards the Aspie, as was the original intent. ?To do this we will need to find a CONSISTENT place where we can meet at a CONSISTENT day and time. ??I don't feel my running the meetings is what is needed either. ?Effective AFTER our game night, ??Diana and the other attendees can work together to "run" the meetings or outings. ?Since I do not have Aspergers, I will help Diana as she requests ?to set up the meeting places and will help arrange for outings. Since we will be changing the focus of this group to Aspies only, I will not be attending the meetings. ?Stay tuned for more information. ?Know that my heart is with each of you. ?I have enjoyed meeing you all, and will keep each of you in my thoughts and prayers. ?But, I really feel that if this group is to be successful, it needs to be lead by ?Aspie(s) and for Aspie(s). ?
God Bless each of you - Deborah ?:)




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