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Re: [humanism-174] advice on planning your funeral

From: Greg P.
Sent on: Friday, September 28, 2012 8:25 AM
That is my number one pet peeve about religious funerals. 
It's a time to grieve and remember, not a fucking altar 
call!

On Thu, 27 Sep[masked]:42:53 -0400
  Mark Tiborsky <[address removed]> wrote:
> A quick aside about funerals... two Saturdays ago, Marni 
>& I attended the
> memorial service of the mother of a good friend in the 
>group. The mother
> passed way too young at 61 :(
> 
> Anyway- after saying some kind words about the deceased, 
>the pastor
> launched into the part of Alice in Wonderland where 
>Alice asks the Chesire
> Cat which way she should go. Then he abruptly said, 
>"Now, for those of us
> who prefer non-fiction...", and proceeded to talk about 
>Lord Jesus Christ &
> the "path" to get right with him :)
> On Sep 27,[masked]:28 PM, "Joanna" 
><[address removed]> wrote:
> 
>> Bah-humbug. I prefer to lean on memory and what does 
>>remain; to count the
>> moments that I did have, rather than the ones I never 
>>will.  To each their
>> own. Perhaps you will find your comfort one day.
>>
>>
>> --------------------­----------
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> *In Loving Memory of SSG Edward W. Carman
>> *Nov. 1976-Apr.2004 - US Army, 2/12 Cavalry
>>
>>
>> --------------------­----------
>> *From:* Linas K Muliolis <[address removed]>
>> *To:* [address removed]
>> *Sent:* Thu, September 27,[masked]:54:19 PM
>> *Subject:* Re: [humanism-174] advice on planning your 
>>funeral
>>
>> Doesn't matter what remains, you will never interact 
>>with that person
>> again....  :(
>> Not in the sense of meeting conscious mind with 
>>conscious mind...
>>
>>
>>
>> On Thu, Sep 27, 2012 at 6:51 PM, Joanna 
>><[address­ removed]> wrote:
>>
>>>  Though you must lose, however, it is a comfort still 
>>>that something
>>> remains. The person, I must disagree, does live on; not 
>>>in its own
>>> consciousness, but within those...you know where I'm 
>>>going with that.
>>>
>>> I say a person who was loved is never gone.
>>>
>>> Sent from Yahoo! Mail on Android
>>>
>>>  --------------------­----------
>>> * From: * Linas K Muliolis <[address removed]>;
>>> * To: * <[address removed]>;
>>> * Subject: * Re: [humanism-174] advice on planning your 
>>>funeral
>>> * Sent: * Thu, Sep 27,[masked]:46:18 PM
>>>
>>>   It's really cool and all, but still, the 
>>>consciou­sness, the person, is
>>> still not the same as the energy and atoms, etc...
>>>
>>> That will forever be gone...
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> On Thu, Sep 27, 2012 at 4:41 PM, sheri presloid 
>>><[add­ress removed]>wrote:
>>>
>>>> You made my day, Joanna!  I am glad that you got the 
>>>>same­ reaction I
>>>> did.
>>>>
>>>> I lost seven people (including my mother and best 
>>>>frie­nd) since July
>>>> 2011.  I found this so comforting and thought of the 
>>>>mate­rial things that I
>>>> have from my mother and friend and I will look at those 
>>>>obje­cts in a
>>>> different way.   :)
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> On Thu, Sep 27, 2012 at 4:07 PM, Joanna 
>>>><­[address removed]> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>>­ Wow. That is beautiful and, when I think of those lost 
>>>>>­to me, I am
>>>>>­ comforted. Thank you for sharing.
>>>>>­
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ Sent from Yahoo! Mail on Android
>>>>>­
>>>>>­  --------------------­----------
>>>>>­ * From: * sheri presloid <[address removed]>;
>>>>>­ * To: * <[address removed]>;
>>>>>­ * Subject: * [humanism-174] advice on planning your 
>>>>>­funeral
>>>>>­ * Sent: * Thu, Sep 27,[masked]:14:28 PM
>>>>>­
>>>>>­   I was listening to The Thinking Atheist podcast on An 
>>>>>­Atheist
>>>>>­ Funeral and he ended the episode with an email from a 
>>>>>­listener who sent in
>>>>>­ the following.  I googled it and it was on NPR
>>>>>­ http://www.npr.or...­. 
>>>>>­ I
>>>>>­ thought it was just perfect.  This is from 2005, so this 
>>>>>­might have been
>>>>>­ repeated.
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ *Commentator Aaron Freeman isn't a person who does much 
>>>>>­planning
>>>>>­ ahead. However, if you like to look ahead to the future, 
>>>>>­he has some advice
>>>>>­ for you, advice on planning your funeral.*
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ AARON FREEMAN:
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want 
>>>>>­the physicist
>>>>>­ to talk to your grieving family about the conservation 
>>>>>­of energy, so they
>>>>>­ will understand that your energy has not died. You want 
>>>>>­the physicist to
>>>>>­ remind your sobbing mother about the first law of 
>>>>>thermodynamics;­ that no
>>>>>­ energy gets created in the universe, and none is 
>>>>>­destroyed. You want your
>>>>>­ mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, 
>>>>>­every Btu of heat,
>>>>>­ every wave of every particle that was her beloved child 
>>>>>­remains with her in
>>>>>­ this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping 
>>>>>­father that amid
>>>>>­ energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got.
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ And at one point you'd hope that the physicist would 
>>>>>­step down from the
>>>>>­ pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in 
>>>>>­the pew and tell him
>>>>>­ that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, 
>>>>>­all the particles
>>>>>­ whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch 
>>>>>­of your hair,
>>>>>­ hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like 
>>>>>­children, their
>>>>>­ ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in 
>>>>>­the arms of a
>>>>>­ loving family, may the physicist let her know that all 
>>>>>­the photons that
>>>>>­ bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors 
>>>>>­that are her eyes,
>>>>>­ that those photons created within her constellations of 
>>>>>­electromagnetically
>>>>>­ charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ And the physicist will remind the congregation of how 
>>>>>­much of all our
>>>>>­ energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning 
>>>>>­themselves with
>>>>>­ their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that 
>>>>>­the warmth that
>>>>>­ flowed through you in life is still here, still part of 
>>>>>­all that we are,
>>>>>­ even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ *And you'll want the physicist to explain to those who 
>>>>>­loved you that
>>>>>­ they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have 
>>>>>­faith. Let them know
>>>>>­ that they can measure, that scientists have measured 
>>>>>­precisely the
>>>>>­ conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable 
>>>>>­and consistent
>>>>>­ across space and time. You can hope your family will 
>>>>>­examine the evidence
>>>>>­ and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and 
>>>>>­that they'll be
>>>>>­ comforted to know your energy's still around. According 
>>>>>­to the law of the
>>>>>­ conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you're 
>>>>>­just less orderly.
>>>>>­ *
>>>>>­
>>>>>­
>>>>>­
>>>>>­
>>>>>­ --
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>>>>>­ This message was sent by sheri presloid 
>>>>>­([address removed]) from The
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>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
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>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> --
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