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Modern Love: The Paradox of Desire in Long Term Relationships with Esther Perel


We are delighted to have Esther Perel speking to the New York Power Team this month! Esther is the author of the International best seller Mating in Captivity. She has appeared on Oprah! and the Today Show!

Exciting news! - Esther's book, Mating in Captivity, was just mentioned by Harriet Lerner author of Marriage Rules on All Things Considered on NPR as the number 1 book on sexuality and relationships:

Esther will also be featured on April 20 on 20/20. The show is titled "Unconventional Relationships". Let your friends know on twitter & facebook!

* Please Note: Price is $20.00 at the door, so please register in advance to get the $16.00 price! *

- Desire, Intimacy, Love and Sex in Relationships -

At our May 8th NYPT meeting, Esther Perel will share her bold take on intimacy and sex, probe the ambiguities of love and desire, exploring ways to balance the need for security and closeness, with the quest for separateness and passion. Does good intimacy guarantee good sex? Why does the transition to parenthood so often spell erotic disaster? These are some of the questions Esther will address in order to cultivate eroticism and playfulness in our relationships, even after kids and post midlife, and put the X back into sex.

Esther Perel

Psychologist Esther Perel is recognized as one of the world's most original and insightful voices on couples and sexuality across cultures. Fluent in nine languages, the Belgian native is a celebrated speaker sought around the globe for her expertise in emotional and erotic intelligence, work-life balance, cross-cultural relations, conflict resolution and identity of modern marriage and family. Her best-selling and award-winning book, Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic, has been translated into 24 languages.

Ms. Perel's innovative models for couple relations and leadership have won her an international clientele, from the boardroom to the bedroom and from academia to television. Clients include Janssen Pharmaceutica, AT&T, Johnson and Johnson, Anthony Robbins Productions, The Soros Foundation's Open Society Institute, The Wexner Foundation, The Bronfman Foundation and New York University Medical Center. For more than a quarter of a century, she has implemented effective transitions with international families, boards and executive teams.

As a regular media commentator, Ms Perel has been widely featured in the international press. She has been a guest on numerous television shows including the "Oprah Winfrey Show," "The Today Show," "CBS This Morning,"TV Globo's "Fantastico" in Brazil and Andrew Denton's "Enough Rope" in Australia. Her interviews have appeared in leading publications such as The Washington Post, The New Yorker, Vogue, Le Monde, Ha'aretz, Stern, La Republica, The Guardian, The Observer and The Sydney Morning Herald; and she writes a popular column for the magazine Oh La La, published by the Argentine newspaper La Nación.

To learn more about Esther's upcoming workshops, please visit the following websites:


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July 20-22 Esther Perel at Kripalu

Mating In Captivity - Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

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October 26-28 Esther Perel at Omega: Unlocking your Erotic Intelligence

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“Esther Perel is an impassioned, intoxicating speaker. She talks fast and hard and she weaves her clients into her monologue. She references them constantly: anonymously, brilliantly, luridly, with compassion and as excellent, gossipy snippets. They are her characters, and her living proof that her theories have merit. Sometimes, as she's telling me their stories, I get goosebumps. Sometimes I feel a bit teary. Sometimes it's as if Perel's talking to me - about me - and no one has ever understood me quite as well.
-- Polly Vernon, The Guardian (UK)

“Mating in Captivity takes a hard line against one of the most time-honored institutions in human history: the sexless marriage…It reads like a cross between the works of Jacques Lacan and French Women Don’t Get Fat.”
-- The New Yorker

“As revelatory as it is straightforward…nicely accessible…[Perel] offers the estranged modern couple a unique richness of experience.”
-- Publishers Weekly

"[Mating in Captivity] makes fewer promises and raises thornier questions than any other how-to-improve-your-relationship book you’ve ever read, which is exactly why you should read this one…[Perel] writes with worldliness and nuance and seems as comfortable drawing on Proust as from Passionate Marriage.”
-- Elle

“Her advice is refreshingly counter-intuitive.”

“Perel says the kind of things that are so contrary to popular wisdom, they actually sound blasphemous - and yet, at precisely the same moment that you’re being shocked by her, you’re also acknowledging the validity of her ideas. Perel’s ideas are...instantly familiar because they resonate deeply. It’s all rather terrifying in its intuitiveness and its pure rightness.”
-- The Observer (UK)

“Esther Perel is a fearless writer and thinker who will challenge your views about sex in a radical and fundamental way. She has the most original, edgy, intelligent, and high-spirited voice out there on passionless sex versus erotic vitality. She writes like a dream, making it nearly impossible to put down this book even when you want to.”
-- Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., author of Dance of Anger

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After the New York Power Team event, at approximately 10pm,
Join us nearby for the After Party at Bar 515

Bar 515 is located on 3rd Avenue between 34th and 35th.

Join or login to comment.

  • Frank C.

    Yet another outstanding speaker for the New York Power Team! Esther Perel was absolutely amazing as a speaker, and very generous with her time. Huge thanks to Fabienne for bringing her to our group, and thank you to all the volunteers who help make these events happen month after month. 1-2-3 YOU ROCK!

    June 3, 2012

  • Joseph

    Esther was authentically brilliant in her delivery. I personally walked away with a deeper understanding of how to truly BE in an intimate relationship. Thanks to everyone who came out to make this our most popular NY PowerTeam event so far. More to come. Keep on the look out. :)

    May 10, 2012

  • Fran

    I wish there were a 10-stardescription category because that's where Esther belongs. It is truly an awesome blessing to be a member of the NY PowerTeam to have access to this level speaker. It was easily worth hundreds of dollars. Any one of the more-than-several insights i received was well worth the time investment and much more than the $ investment. This one went out of the ball park. Life will never be the same again! Of course, the volunteer staff was wonderful as usual. Always ready to serve above and beyond measure. Thanks for your smiles, encouragement and faithfulness.
    BRAVO!!! 1-2-3... You ROCK!!!

    May 9, 2012

  • Robert R.

    Esther is a very engaging speaker and I learned some very valuable insights that I can apply immediately in my own marriage.

    May 9, 2012

  • Flip B.

    Perel's talk was engaging, interactive, and informative.

    May 9, 2012

  • A former member
    A former member

    Esther Perel was phenomenal. She is very to-the-point, offered unique insights, and really made me think.

    May 9, 2012

  • A former member
    A former member

    Esther is a fantastic speaker who takes things that feel complex and makes them simple. Great examples and exercises to bring it all to life. She's witty, relatable, intelligent and brings a new perspective to the love/desire conversation. I had a great time and many aha moments.

    May 9, 2012

  • Ava K.

    Amazing!! Thank YOU :)

    May 9, 2012

  • A former member
    A former member

    I live in NJ but work in NYC. Let me know if you'd like to meet up before the Meetup.

    May 7, 2012

  • Mary C.

    Anyone coming from NJ?

    May 7, 2012

  • Joseph

    At 10pm, Join us for the After Party at Bar 515, Bar 515 is located on 3rd Avenue between 34th and 35th.

    May 3, 2012

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