addressalign-toparrow-leftarrow-rightbackbellblockcalendarcameraccwcheckchevron-downchevron-leftchevron-rightchevron-small-downchevron-small-leftchevron-small-rightchevron-small-upchevron-upcircle-with-checkcircle-with-crosscircle-with-pluscontroller-playcredit-cardcrossdots-three-verticaleditemptyheartexporteye-with-lineeyefacebookfolderfullheartglobe--smallglobegmailgooglegroupshelp-with-circleimageimagesinstagramFill 1launch-new-window--smalllight-bulblinklocation-pinm-swarmSearchmailmessagesminusmoremuplabelShape 3 + Rectangle 1ShapeoutlookpersonJoin Group on CardStartprice-ribbonprintShapeShapeShapeShapeImported LayersImported LayersImported Layersshieldstartickettrashtriangle-downtriangle-uptwitteruserwarningyahoo

Single Parents - Divorced Adults Group Message Board › Reaching out for help

Reaching out for help

Monica
user 12395857
Baraboo, WI
Post #: 6
I could really use someone to talk to, regarding custody and money stuff. I never in a million years thought my ex-husband and I would become so embittered toward each other that we wouldn't be able to work things out with regard to our daughter, but it seems that is what's happening, and I feel like I'm drowning. I feel awful asking for someone to talk to, especially strangers, but I honestly don't have a single friend or family member who has gone through a divorce with a child.

Also, I'm looking for a new home for my dog. If you know of anyone who might want a companion, please let me know.

Thanks.
A former member
Post #: 6

Monica, I

Remember one thing: It will get better. Really.... It did for me and it will for you also.

Divorce tends to bring bitterness to even the most kind souls. However, logic and reason will take over sooner or later. Until then, I recommend that you talk to others about what you are feeling. The larger monthly social Meetups are not the best venue for this. Come to the play date on Sunday. The group is smaller (5-6) and more conducive to such discussion. Stay well. Dave


I could really use someone to talk to, regarding custody and money stuff. I never in a million years thought my ex-husband and I would become so embittered toward each other that we wouldn't be able to work things out with regard to our daughter, but it seems that is what's happening, and I feel like I'm drowning. I feel awful asking for someone to talk to, especially strangers, but I honestly don't have a single friend or family member who has gone through a divorce with a child.

Also, I'm looking for a new home for my dog. If you know of anyone who might want a companion, please let me know.

Thanks.

Lisa
user 12078465
Madison, WI
Post #: 9
Monica,

I have heard great things about both of these classes.

Divorcecare at High Point Church

and the rebuilders group. www.rebuildersmadison.com

It is a sign of strength to know when to ask for help. We've all been there.

If you want to ask more about these groups don't hesitate.

Take care,

Lisa
Laura
user 6540411
Madison, WI
Post #: 71
There is also a support group that meets once a week at Bethel Lutheran Church downtown Madison. I believe it meets Tuesdays, but I'm not sure. I do know that other members have attended that one and said it was helpful. I and a nuber of others are former Rebuilders, so if you have questions about that program, please do not hesitate to ask. It's important to note, however, that there is a cost associated with Rebuilders (assume at least $250-300), so that is something to consider.
Monica
user 12395857
Baraboo, WI
Post #: 10
Thank you all so much!
Ken
user 10992199
Madison, WI
Post #: 2
Monica,

I attended the DivorceCare program, and it was very helpful. I went to Blackhawk on the near west side.

I combined that with individual counseling (not with DivorceCare), which was covered by insurance. This was immensely helpful as well.

A good attorney can also help reduce the stress you are under. If you feel someone is on your side and protecting your interests, you don't feel so under attack.

Some days you'll even feel like you can breath again.



A former member
Post #: 23
I really felt the support group at Bethel helped me a lot. I still go on occasions. It meets every Tuesday at 7pm and is never canceled.
A former member
Post #: 2
Monica, you have a tough row to hoe. I've been down the high-conflict path, and I can tell you that the best way to proceed is to stick to the high road. I'd be happy to talk with you more about this.
What kind of dog do you have? I've been thinking about a companion for mine.
Dave
Monica
user 12395857
Baraboo, WI
Post #: 14
Dave,
Thanks for your kind words. My dog is a total mutt...long story but I generally go with Lab/Boxer/Beagle. Let me know if you'd like to see a picture.

Thanks,
Monica
A former member
Post #: 35
I'm going to second the high road path. I was very angry but my lawyer told me to get myself out of my marriage and deal with my own issues. He told me that what would impress the court the most would be my willingness to compromise. My ex's lawyer encouraged the opposite approach and not only does it not work to her advantage, it's cost us all a lot of money, time, and prolonged emotional damage.

A good lawyer will have a strategy that isn't just about winning in court, but also sees the big picture. There are no winners in war, try to avoid one. Take the high road whenever you can. There is no reason to win arguments about the past, no reason fight about things from a marriage that is over, moving on means letting go and sometimes letting your ex feel that they're right is the way to go. Pick your battles. Only fight the ones that really need to be fought.
Powered by mvnForum

People in this
Meetup are also in:

Sign up

Meetup members, Log in

By clicking "Sign up" or "Sign up using Facebook", you confirm that you accept our Terms of Service & Privacy Policy