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Guest post by Brooke Elise Axtell (http://www.brookeaxtell.com/)

Every day I am bombarded with conflicting images and media messages that tell me that I am lacking. Relentless consumption framed as self-improvement depends on the lie that we will never be enough.

What is lost in the onslaught of ads (and ads posing as television shows) are the authentic desires of women. Diverse women. Women of color. Women who are sexually fluid. Women who know that desire is an unfolding process, a transformative conversation engaging body, and soul.

When we place the power to define our worth in someone else’s hands, we are often told that we only want to be wanted. This artificial script leaves us with an extremely narrow role: to be a pleaser.

If we accept society's definition and remain disconnected from our authentic desires, our lives are drained of meaning, emotionally and financially. In this emptied state, we fail to take the initiative to negotiate higher salaries or raise our fees to match our true market value.

We Cannot Negotiate Our Value Unless We Know Our Worth

We can learn all the techniques available to create mutually beneficial agreements, but cannot even begin a conversation about our value unless we know our worth.

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