Olympia Discussion: Breaking the Good Girl Spell: The Myth of the Good Woman

Welcome to this week’s women’s circle! Tonight, we’ll focus on connection and self-discovery. We’ll begin with a fun icebreaker to set the tone and get to know one another better. From there, we’ll explore the evening’s topic, 'Breaking the Good Girl Spell: The Myth of the Good Woman,' through open discussion, sharing our thoughts, and reflecting on personal experiences. This gathering is a space to connect, grow, and be inspired by one another’s journeys. We’ll close with a moment to set intentions, leaving with fresh perspectives and a sense of support. Let’s dive in and make this time meaningful together!

Below is the "Mindful Musing" for the week which includes our Main Topic and some questions for us to explore together!

She was polite. Pleasant. Helpful. Always knew how to make everyone else comfortable. She smiled even when she was unraveling. She didn't take up too much space. She didn't ask for too much. She was “good.” But was she whole?

So many of us were taught to be good before we were taught to be real. We learned how to shape-shift to be liked, to soften our opinions so we wouldn’t be “too much,” and to make sure everyone else’s needs were met before we even considered our own. We called it being kind. Being strong. Being mature. But underneath? It was a performance. And the cost? Ourselves.

This session is where we name it. Where we gently—and maybe a little rebelliously—question who benefits from our “goodness.” And who we could become if we stopped performing it. Being good isn’t the problem. But being good at the expense of your truth? That’s a life half-lived. You're allowed to be honest. Messy. Loud. Tender. Angry. Unapologetically yourself.

Let’s talk about who you are when you’re not performing. Let’s meet her.

### Discussion Questions

1. When did you first learn that being “good” would keep you safe, loved, or accepted?
2. What does being a “good woman” mean in your family or culture—and how has that shaped you?
3. What parts of yourself have you edited or hidden to seem more likable?
4. Where do you still over-function or emotionally manage others to keep the peace?
5. What relationships in your life reinforce the “good girl” identity?
6. When was the last time you did something just because it felt true—even if it made someone else uncomfortable?
7. What does your inner rebel or wild self want to say to the part of you who still seeks approval?
8. What’s one area of your life where you’re tired of performing?
9. If you didn’t have to be good—what would you be?
10. What would it feel like to be fully seen in your truth, not just your pleasing?