Details on the film + drinks before below.
PREMISE
A lethal pathogen breaks free from containment in Cold Storage, a sci-fi horror-comedy played for goopy laughs and adapted from Jurassic Park screenwriter David Koepp‘s propulsive B-movie style 2019 novel.
That it sat on the shelf following its 2023 production suggests a lack of confidence, despite talent in front of and behind the camera, or at least a skittishness for joining an increasingly crowded field of outbreak horror titles. It’s a shame; Cold Storage may not capture the energetic, humorous highs of its source material, but it’s still a fun horror romp suitable for date night this Valentine’s Day.
Koepp translates his novel for the screen with only the most minor deviations, right down to lines of dialogue, keeping this action-heavy feature faithful to the material and moving at a brisk pace. A cold open introduces not only the pathogen, a parasitic fungus that’s been supercharged by its mutation in space, but also Liam Neeson‘s Robert Quinn. The hardboiled military agent will become the world’s only line of defence against the invasive threat when the underground storage facility housing fails nearly two decades later, turning a routine night shift into ground zero of an impending apocalypse.
At the frontlines of the madness are Teacake (Stranger Things’ Joe Keery) and Naomi (Barbarian‘s Georgina Campbell), two employees thrust into the middle of the chaos when they investigate an alarm beeping somewhere deep within the building. The pair’s natural charisma and easy banter instil easy rooting interest as Koepp’s lean script wastes zero time escalating the fungus’ determined tactics to spread. Their giddy curiosity and banter feels relatable over stupid, and Teacake’s candid attempts to impress his new co-worker are as charming as Naomi’s observant, accepting nature. But the budding romance between them is often waylaid by the nonstop but increasing insanity caused by the outbreak.
That entails no shortage of thick green slime, exploded guts, and zombie-like carnage as the fungus seeks hosts, albeit of the noticeable CGI variety. It prevents the gruesome zombie animal deaths from veering into somber territory, but it also leaves you longing for practical effects when the splatter really kicks into overdrive. Director Jonny Campbell (Netflix’s Dracula) helms the goopy madness with workman efficiency, but struggles to make the comedy pop.
Cold Storage announces its playful intentions with an opening text card that reads “Pay attention. This shit is real.” That playfulness peeks through here and there, when Teacake blunders his way through a botched attempt to flirt, or Neeson delivers a B-movie one-liner, but Campbell maintains such laser focus on keeping this wacky journey on the rails to meet its brisk runtime that it winds up more deflated in energy than the material warrants. There’s a flatness to Cold Storage‘s antics that keeps it from ever becoming truly infectious for the horror fan.
Luckily, there’s still amusement to be had by Koepp’s solid concept and the talented cast, the type of which that suggests far bigger plans for this adaptation that were dropped along the road to release. Sosie Bacon brings early heroics and horror, while Academy Award winners Vanessa Redgrave and Lesley Manville round out the cast to help save the day, for example.
The outbreak horror comedy never takes itself too seriously, but it sometimes feels too reluctant to let its humour take the spotlight. That yields an entertaining throwback romp perfect for date night, but one that dangles its greater potential in plain sight. Even still, the zippy, fun, and sweet inner core ensures a refreshing change of pace from the usual outbreak horror films that feel designed solely to remind us of humanity’s worst. Here, even society’s discarded trapped at minimum wage can save the day from the horrors of bad bosses and explosive goo. (https://bloody-disgusting.com/reviews/3934773/cold-storage-review-joe-keery-and-georgina-campbell-bring-date-night-fun-to-outbreak-horror-comedy/)
TRAILER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kea7gnh1uYA
CINEMA TICKETS
TBA
DRINKS
We can go for a drink before the movie at The Imperial.
SCHEDULE BREAKDOWN
TBA - drinks at The Imperial, 5 Leicester St, London WC2H 7BL
TBA - film at Vue Cinema London - West End (Leicester Square) - 3 Cranbourn St, London WC2H 7AL
ADDRESS AND DETAILS
Vue Cinema London - West End (Leicester Square) - 3 Cranbourn St, London WC2H 7AL
