Ex-Mormon

**After a long winter hibernation, we're baaack!** Let's start off the kayaking season on the Rio Nabão while the water levels are still high from the rainy season. We will paddle 7 kms down the lush, isolated river landscapes from the beach in Sobreirinho all the way to the templar city of Tomar, passing through a few "mini rapids" and one portage near an abandoned paper factory. Whether you're an experienced kayaker or a sporty beginner looking to try something new, this event is perfect for outdoor enthusiasts. **Duration**: approx. 5 hours in total * 3 hours on the water (incl. breaks) * 2 hours for a picnic lunch and swim at the river beach **Price**: €20 per person. This includes: * Kayak rental, including life jacket and paddle * Certified monitors to ensure the safety of all participants To reserve your spot and facilitate organization with the kayak company, please send your **payment** via Revolut (@maaadison) or MBWay (+491624520214) **by the end of the day Tuesday, April 7th**. First come, first served! **What to bring:** * Swimsuit, neoprene, and/or clothes that can get wet * Shoes/sandals that can get wet * Sunscreen and hat * Change of clothes, second pair of shoes, and a towel * Waterproof case for your phone to take pictures along the way * Picnic lunch and blanket **Level:** Suitable for sporty beginners and children (12+). Well-behaved dogs welcome. Basic instructions will be given by the guides before we begin. The kayak rental company covers personal accident and civil liability insurance at no extra cost. Safety is taken very seriously and there will be certified monitors guiding us along the descent. **How to get there**: 🚙 : Arrive by **09:30** by car(pool) to the [river beach in Sobreirinho](https://maps.app.goo.gl/bnyce8K8AmWaySSP6) After you have pre-paid, you will be invited to the WhatsApp community to organize carpooling as well as share pictures and other event-related information. There is no public transport in the area, so make sure to join the group chat! **Important notes:** * If the water levels/current are not safe on the day of our descent, we will switch to the nearby river Zêzere * This event will take place even with a chance of light rain - consider a rain jacket for your own comfort See you on the water! *Lisbon Kayak Crew is not liable for any damages or injuries incurred during this activity. Please evaluate your own health and physical state and participate at your own risk.*

Sleep in on Sundays. When you've had your fill of pajama-time, roll out and have some tasty brunch with your fellow Humanists!

How do we recover from having had a toxic or narcissistic ex? How do we move on from the past, especially something as traumatic as a divorce or breakup? How do we avoid anxiety and depression? How do we have more self esteem? In this meeting, you will learn the mental health secrets to help you quickly get over the past and heal your mind. Be sure to click on the red "Attend" button below to come to this local event. We look forward to seeing you there. This group is created by the Dianetics & Scientology life improvement center.

The Humanist Monthly Program is our longest running event and still a community favorite. In the old days it used to be called "Going to HCCO" and we still like to think of it as our flagship event. We will be hearing from Becca Powell, Director of Advocacy and Outreach at Unchained At Last, an organization whose mission is dedication to ending forced and child marriage in the United States through direct services and systems change. Unchained At Last's mission clearly meshes and addresses several of our Humanist Ten Commitments. Becca will educate us about an issue many of us may not be familiar with--but should be. Food and drinks will be provided at the event. Feel free to show up a little bit early to hang out and talk. Going forward our meetings will be hybrid. You can meet us in-person or attend online Join Zoom Meeting [https://us02web.zoom.us/j/87836564953?pwd=4Mi57ElZkDIFlb1fnlNwOJ0NiOK4tP.1](https://us02web.zoom.us/j/87836564953?pwd=4Mi57ElZkDIFlb1fnlNwOJ0NiOK4tP.1) Meeting ID: 878 3656 4953 Passcode: 760812 One tap mobile +19292056099,,87836564953#,,,,\*760812# US (New York) +13017158592,,87836564953#,,,,\*760812# US (Washington DC) The formal presentation will start at noon

Start your week the right way with Manic Mondays. Giving you an enjoyable Bachata lesson with a push of cool moves. The second hour has Beginner/Intermediate Salsa on 1. You must understand basic Salsa skills to participate. 730pm-830pm Bachata Cool Moves 830pm-930pm Salsa On 1 (Beginner/Intermediate) $15 for One Class $20 for Both Free Parking & Plenty of Dance Space.

The Fellowship of the Star Schema: Transforming OLTP Data for Power BI One does not simply build reports on OLTP data. Join us on an epic journey from the depths of raw, normalized tables to the shining halls of a well-modeled star schema fit for Power BI greatness. We will demystify the differences between OLTP and OLAP, walk through star schema vs snowflake (and why Power BI has a clear favorite), and show you the compression differences between normalized and columnar storage that will make you never look at an OLTP model the same way again. We will cover the different types of dimensions, when to use them, and how to handle Slowly Changing Dimensions without losing your mind. You will leave knowing exactly how to identify a bad model, how to convert OLTP data into a clean star schema, and how to forge relationships that rule them all. Whether you are a data wizard, a curious hobbit, or somewhere in between, your models will never be the same.

Come assist Van Buren Shelter (https://ymcacolumbus.org/locations/vanburen) staff in serving dinners and cleaning up on the 3rd Tuesday of each month. Dinner for the women is 5-6 pm and for the families is 6:15-7:15 pm. There is ample free parking available in the shelter's lot. The recommended area to park is in green in the image above. There will be a new entrance for the time being. We are asking all volunteers to enter through the Donation Dock door, the orange mark on the image above. This door is located between the Single Adults and Family Shelter. You will see 2 large garage doors with a large green trash compactor in the center. Please head to the closest garage door to the building wall, with a ramp leading up. There, you will see a door with a sign stating instructions on how to enter the building. Please ring the doorbell, and a staff member will come and escort you into the building. If a staff member takes longer than 5 minutes, please call the front desk at 614-689-2020. This is a new process for us, and we do not want to keep you waiting! We appreciate your patience as we navigate this temporary change. The shelter needs a volunteer count the day before the event so sign-up ends Monday at 4:50 PM. Afterwards some of us go to the Omnipresent Atheists Weekly Meetup in progress to have a bit to eat or drink (http://www.meetup.com/omnipresentatheists/). Volunteers must be 14 or older. Since we will be working around families, the YMCA does not permit volunteering by individuals with convictions for violent or sexual crimes. The YMCA reserves the right to run background checks on volunteers. For questions, comment on this page or contact: Andrew, awhit12@yahoo.com, (614)937-5802 (cell). Please let Andrew know if you volunteer anytime other than our COUNT events so that he can count your hours toward our service record.