Virtualisation

Time is precious. Here we value non-boring valuable chats and interactions that are fully engaging, soulfully enriching, inspiring, and leave you a bit wiser than when you arrived. In that spirit (mind the pun!), today’s fully hosted laid back social coffee chat will offer a perfect haven for the inquisitive & curious - those drawn to the mysteries of the universe, life and everything in between. A tasty caffeine infused fun afternoon of thought-provoking causal chats exploring spirituality/consciousness and related interconnected topics spanning **philosophy,** **neuroscience**, **parapsychology,** **paranormal.** **cosmology** and **noetic sciences** over a mug of sweet coffee (or amazin value Chardonnay!) Chaired by me - a former Reuters journalist & published empirical researcher exploring spirituality topics in pursuant of the "truth" since a teenager, there'll be no strict structure - a relaxed friendly space to openly chat, exchange ideas & experiences without judgement, but I'll preside to promote inclusivity and zone in on specifics to avoid people digressing onto unrelated tangents to ensure like all of our events - particpants derive maximum utlity and engagement from attending. We’ll touch on everything from the limits of scientific understanding to exploring the unexplained using practical fun exploratory divination practices drawing on elements of **psychology, metaphysics, epistemology** and **statistical** **probability** of rare events as we do so. Whether you're a practicing "spiritualist", a curious skeptic, or just someone who loves deep conversation on **life’s big questions**, you’ll hopefully walk away more enlightened with some practical tips you can start applying and inspired to explore more! As well as illuminating chats to guide self-reflection, obviously no sprituality event woul be complete without practical tools so there'll be FREE Tarot & I-Ching readings, demonstrations of meditation method to activate super powerful gamma brain waves, and pyschic tests for a bit of fun, laughter & intrigue! **Sample of conversational threads** might include: Are we mere organisms pursuing biological survival or does consciousness exist beyond neurons firing in our brains? What explains peoples' paranormal experiences? What would reality look like If our brains were limitless? Declassified CIA files show that as as well as mind control experiments, the US govt employed mediums and remote viewers. If all mumbo jumbo then why? Is Nirvana just a fantasy of deluded people? Does everything happen for a reason? To clarify - we define spirituality here as an exploration of consciousness, Donald Rumsfeld's unknown unknowns and undiscovered aspects of reality, NOT religion. After all, as my philosophy professor once rightly postulated to me: "If God created Adam, who created God Lucas?" Yep - that inconvenient flaw **debunks every fairytale religion** out there including the oldest religion of them all - paganism - so why is witchcraft still practised outside of **Hogwarts** today? I may also share the latest peer reviewed empirical evidence surrounding **paranormal** and **consciousness** phenomena. **=== POTENTIAL CONVERSATION STARTERS ===** 1. Does consciousness survive death or is Cambridge Astrophysics Professor Brian Cox right in asserting if **ghosts** existed then particle accelerators at CERN would have already detected ghost molecules making Ouija boards kids play? Are Poltergiests 100% hoax? Brain scans indicate thalamocortical circuits in our brain (pathways in the parietal cortex & central lateral thalamus) drive **consciousness -** so how can spirit/mind live on after **brain death**? 2. Is **synchronicity/coincidence** simply randomness disguised in the eye of the beholder or can what Einstein called “spooky action at a distance" (quantum entanglement) explain it? Molecular Biologists have shown that just like plants - our cells give off resonant frequencies between 10 & 180 kilohertz - could this be a source of non-verbal communication like telepathy? 3. Given **neuroscience**'s infancy with much yet undiscovered - could mediation help access functions outside of our BAU alpha & beta brain wave states? Can **Kundalini yoga** boost **DMT** (dimethyltryptamine) naturally vs drugs like ayahuasca, mushrooms, LSDand if so by what mechanism? Do the artifically created neural signatures using magnetic stimulation observed during mystical experiences debunk them? Is the Maharishi Effect real? 4. Are clairvoyants and mediums just good people readers or are they really able to access time and space in non-linear ways? Is Tyler Henry the real deal or just faking it? Was **Abraham Lincolm** precognizant when he dreamt his own fatal assignation? 5. The laws of statistical probability, Drake Equation & common sense tells us there is other non-microbial life out there. So what explains the Fermi Paradox? Was that 1976 WOW signal aliens? How about the recent strange bahaviour of Boyajian's star or Oumuamua/Atlas interstella object that has just entered our solar system? 6. Could metaverse explain deja vu & reincarnation vs theories from the **psychology** literature (Mandela Effect?) or do we just live in a **simulation** as **Elon Musk** proposes? 7. **Stephen Hawking** once said: "The past, like the future, is indefinite and exists only as a spectrum of possibilities" If matter only manifests when observed as the double slit experiments shows, does that mean everything is consciousness? Does the discovery of *quantum superposition /* disappearing neutrons imply **parallel universes**? 8. Do NDEs suggest something beyond physicality? Were Steve Jobs final words "Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow" before he died (New York Times) visions of an afterlife or just neurochemical changes / drugs playing tricks? 9. Can photons omitted by our bodies explain auras that people see? 10. Could limits in our understanding of quantum physics, space and time explain paranormal experiences? 11. What existed before the **big bang** \- how do you get something from "nothing"? I believe our reality is the product of a black hole\. What you reckon? ***So how do we get to the "truth"?*** Both in my journalism days and applying the most advanced empirical research techniques in my client consulting work - it becomes clear the truth is often elusive. No matter how much we triangulate evidence - we can only provide part answers. "All models are wrong, but some are useful" George Box What we think we know and reality diverge leading to that great **paradox of knowledge.** And as the boundary between knowns and unknown converge, we end up with cognitive dissonance and more questions. In that spirit - every credible philosopher & scientist acknowledges - we'll never get to the complete truth but could **experimental methods** get us closer to it? A balanced approach guided by Immanuel Kant's pragmatism and Aristotle's deductive reasoning seems the most rationale framework here but are there any other methodologies? How about the **"spirituality"** toolkit? **=== RENDEZVOUS POINT ===** We will meet inside the pub upstairs - located in Islington, 4 seconds walk from Highbury & Islington station or 12 mins from Angel station. l I'll be wearing a **Starwars identifier** and will share mobile hotline just before event start and table number/location. For stargazing we will walk to park 5 mins away around 7.30pm Lucas - The Unenlightened Desperately Seeking Answers

Want to feel more confident in English? Join our friendly group classes and practise in a relaxed, supportive environment. ✔ Improve your grammar and comprehension ✔ Build your vocabulary and speaking skills ✔ Meet new people while learning ✔ Gain a certificate for good attendance ✔ Classes are completely **free** because the teachers are training with the University of Cambridge accredited CELTA course No cost. No pressure. Just real learning, face-to-face. 📅 Mondays & Wednesdays 🕡 6:30 – 8:30 pm 📍24 Great Chapel St. London W1F 8FS (near Tottenham Court rd) ✅ Everyone welcome!

SAFO Music Group hosts monthly Networking Evenings on the first Monday of every month. This is an amazing opportunity for artists and music industry professionals to build their network of contacts as well as learn invaluable industry advice. SAFO Music Group HQ is based in Crouch Hill, London and our team have worked with the likes of Sam Smith, Pixie Lott, The 1975, Becky Hill, Samantha Harvey, Ella Eyre and many more. Our meet up groups run from 18:00 - 21:00 and entry is completely free. Part of the evening includes speed listening sessions where artists and producers will have the opportunity to play one song (USB, Phone or Weblinks) to gain some valuable feedback. Do check out our video so you get a little taste of the evening: https://youtu.be/1CzfgY78CXQ We'll look forward to meeting you soon! The SAFO Music Group www.safomusicgroup.com 0207 683 3333

This is a mini-group class for a small number of English students (minimum 2, maximum 4) so that everyone gets lots of opportunity to speak and be corrected. We switch topics as the conversation flows, so that you can get used to talking about a variety of subjects and build your confidence, grammar and vocabulary. The atmosphere is fun and friendly and you'll meet new people to practice with. Look forward to seeing you there!

# *Daily Tantric Devotion* #### *Live morning live practice with Agni Chandra* [To join for free for 7 Days click here](https://www.organicurrent.com/offers/iq2vi32q/checkout) This sessions happens 8AM BST Mon-Fri and Sunday. ***Tantric Breathwork to activate your energy*** ***Powerful awakening of all energy centers*** ***Meditation to ground in your expanded state of being*** Bring powerful transformational tantric practices into your everylife to transform from the inside out. [Watch a video explaining the transformational power of these practices](https://www.instagram.com/tv/Cqk_UvNI47N/?igshid=MDJmNzVkMjY=) ### *What we will practice* *All practices are based on 3 pillars: **breath, sound and movement**. It allows the current of energy to flow freely in your body. **Agni Chandra curates each session** based on:* * *meditative presence* * *conscious connected breath* * *yogic breathing* * *undulation of the spine* * \*application of energetic locks \* *Practices are based on the **principle of deep connection with the body through felt sense.** We **activate our primal energy** and we **channel it up the spine** to the heart and higher energy centers.* ### *Introduction to the 4 Practices of Daily Tantric Devotion* *With **Tantric Breathwork** practices we ground ourselves in the presence through the body. We open to the flow of life through conscious connected breath. The flow of energy that comes with the breath and spinal undulation redirects our sexual energy to the heart and higher energy centers. You are guided into the pure experience through the body to finally transcend the body into the meditative state of being.* ***Free Voicing*** *is a practice that opens up one of the most contracted energy centers - the throat. After grounding and heart centering meditation, we open the pathway of the breath using ancient yogic breathing. That allows the body to reconnect with the most healthy and beneficial way of breathing that is often forgotten.* [More information, example videos ](https://www.organicurrent.com/daily-tantric-devotion-1) JOIN THIS SESSION ❤️ [Join this class with 7 Day Free Trial](https://www.organicurrent.com/offers/iq2vi32q/checkout) ❤️ # #### *Agni Chandra* Telegram group: [https://t.me/organicurrent](https://t.me/organicurrent) *Website:* [https://www.organicurrent.com/](https://www.organicurrent.com/) *Instagram: [https://www.instagram.com/organicurrent_tantra/](https://www.instagram.com/organicurrent_tantra/)*

Come and join us every week day from 12.45pm - 2.45pm. Classes for levels elementary to upper-intermediate (A1+ - B2+) Improve your fluency, listening and reading comprehension, grammar and vocabulary with our friendly classes. No payment needed - the classes are **completely free** because the teachers are training with a University of Cambridge accredited program. Join us at 24 Great Chapel St, London, W1F 8FS Take the level test in advance for more information about classes for your level (link to the level test: https://forms.gle/mn3hqUgo3BRLyAUi7) and wait for up to one business day for more information. OR Come 15 minutes early on your first day to do a quick speaking test and find your classroom. See you soon!

SAFO Music Group hosts monthly Networking Evenings on the first Monday of every month. This is an amazing opportunity for artists and music industry professionals to build their network of contacts as well as learn invaluable industry advice. SAFO Music Group HQ is based in Crouch Hill, London and our team have worked with the likes of Sam Smith, Pixie Lott, The 1975, Becky Hill, Samantha Harvey, Ella Eyre and many more. Our meet up groups run from 18:00 - 21:00 and entry is completely free. Part of the evening includes speed listening sessions where artists and producers will have the opportunity to play one song (USB, Phone or Weblinks) to gain some valuable feedback. Do check out our video so you get a little taste of the evening: https://youtu.be/1CzfgY78CXQ We'll look forward to meeting you soon! The SAFO Music Group www.safomusicgroup.com 0207 683 3333

**A software engineers guide to LLMs** In this talk Richard Conway will break down what LLMs are layer by layer, how they work, how they use software principles to work and how to use them in software. This will be a fluid talk with a lot of philosophy, maths from school and how to build your software understanding things like hallucinations and new techniques that can make your management of LLMs more deterministic. We'll consider a lot of things here including the new code generation tools which have developers quivering in their boots, what they mean for our industry and how to use them for effect. Lots of mini-demos and great discussions, good people, beer and pizza! **About the speaker** Richard Conway co-founded the user group, along with Andy Cross, Joe Hancock and Chris Parsons. He is a Microsoft AI MVP and a Microsoft Regional Director and has been writing software in one form or another since his fingers were large enough to hit a ZX81 keyboard.

Registration Portal: [Event Registration Portal](https://luma.com/cclondon26?utm_source=sherif) About Event ​"Why are there no coffeeshops open late? But what if I want to co-work at night?!?" - everyone on Twitter ​Cerebras is excited to present, Cafe Compute. The first, late-night pop-up coffeeshop with a barista bar ☕️, cozy snacks and couches 🛋️, and more. ​​​​​​This event is brought to you in collaboration with OpenAI. ​​Cerebras is the world’s fastest AI inference, up to 15x faster than leading GPUs. Cerebras Inference is powered by our Wafer-Scale Engine (WSE-3) - the world's largest AI chip. Experience the speed for yourself with OpenAI Codex-Spark, powered on Cerebras, and get free compute at cerebras.ai. Location Please register to see the exact location of this event.

Improve your Spanish/English with a bunch of friendly people over a pint! ¡Puedes mejorar tù Español/Ingles con un grupo de personas amables con una bebida!

We are back! This is going to be a monthly IN PERSON meet up in London. A very big thank you goes to Accurx who is hosting us in their amazing Shoreditch offices. This will include access to facilities including coffee! 😻☕️ **Want to know more? 👇** As with all CoffeeOps, this is an interactive, chatty, build your own adventure type of meet-up. Instead of booking in experts to *learn* *from*, we gather a group of practitioners to ***learn*** ***with***. We have been running for over 4 years now and often get feedback that this is the most useful meetup people join! The event is approximately 90 minutes and always starts by brainstorming topics to discuss. The group then votes on the most relevant/interesting to them and we then cycle through the topics trying to discuss each deeply, but in a time bound slot. To get an idea of topics, you can check out our remote board [here](https://easyretro.io/publicboard/h404NF84Uje4tCcxpJdHr4Ycs9B3/a4a35d2b-181b-409b-832e-a729be1af79c). The general gist is anything is fair game, though we tend to revolve around software delivery and definitely lean towards the more Ops-y or DevOps-y side of things.

**MONTY ENGLISH CONVERSATION GROUP** [https://montyenglish.co.uk/english-conversation-group-classes-in-london](https://montyenglish.co.uk/english-conversation-group-classes-in-london) **How to find us** When you arrive at the Royal George we go down into the basement and you will find us there. Just ask a staff member if you cannot find us! Here is the location of the Royal George on google maps: [https://maps.app.goo.gl/HpkySsu2rEqUUub1A](https://maps.app.goo.gl/HpkySsu2rEqUUub1A) * Food or drink at the pub is not included (please make at least one purchase - they have a good range of drinks and great food if you feel hungry) **How are the lessons?** The lesson is a General English lesson focused on speaking and error correction - every lesson we usually cover 3 different topics. This will encourage you to use new vocabulary and practise grammatical structures. The group has a limit of 25 people but I usually accept people if you are on the waiting list. You will be divided into groups of 3-6 with others of a similar speaking level so you'll have plenty of opportunity to talk and ask questions to your qualified, native teacher Jon. The lesson takes place in the relaxed environment of the Royal George basement which is a pleasant pub, a two-minute walk from Tottenham Court Road tube station. The lesson is ideal for pre-intermediate, intermediate and upper-intermediate students wishing to get to the next level. If you have any questions about the English lesson then please call me or send me a message. **Payment** Payments can be made in cash or by card (free of charge) when you come to the class. If it is your first time it is only £2! After your first time it is £6 for a single class or you can buy a ticket that makes each class cheaper; 5 classes for £20, 10 classes for £25 (you can use these tickets whenever you like and do not need to come in a set period of time) or 20 classes for £40 which has a limited use to within a six-month period. You can also pay via our website: [https://montyenglish.co.uk/english-conversation-group-classes-in-london](https://montyenglish.co.uk/english-conversation-group-classes-in-london) I hope to see you soon - if you have any questions please message me (via WhatsApp) on 07771 561 576 All the best, Jon (event organiser)

**Important:** Register on the [event website](https://www.aicamp.ai/event/eventdetails/W2026040809) is required for admission. **RSVP on meetup is turned off** Enjoy afterwork drinks and practical discussions on Apache Kafka, ClickHouse, PostgreSQL and much more. Enjoy a session designed for data engineers, architects and technical decisions-makers like you, who want to address the challenges they face in data-infrastructure. No high-level pitches but straight into practical discussions on how to build scalable, efficient open sourced-powered data platforms. **Why Attend?** * Connect with local data and tech professionals * Get practical insights into streaming, storage, and analytics with Kafka, Iceberg, PostgreSQL, and ClickHouse * Learn how to reduce operational overhead while scaling your data infrastructure performance * Bring your questions and challenges for direct discussions with Aiven experts **Agenda:** * 4:00pm\~4:30pm: Checkin, Food, Networking * 4:30pm\~6:00pm: Tech talks and Q&A * 6:00pm\~7:00pm: Happy hour, Open discussion, Networking * **Tech Talk: Context Is the New Infrastructure** **Speaker:** Stan Dmitriev (Aiven) **Tech Talk: Apache Kafka on Aiven** **Speaker:** Hugh Evans (Aiven)

We are recruiting new group leaders for virtual men's groups! Our primary groups are outdoor movement groups, but we are launching virtual groups for the state of Ohio and beyond and the groups will move outside in the spring, creating room for men's groups, women's groups and coed groups all over the country. Read below to learn about our groups and click the links at the bottom to apply. ### **What is an Outdoor Empowerment Group?** Our Outdoor Movement & Community Empowerment Groups are simple, guided experiences designed to help people reconnect with nature, themselves, and others. We combine some form of movement (hike, walk, run, bike, yoga, workout) and meaningful conversation within a simple community circle to create a space where individuals can support each other while prioritizing mental and physical well-being. Whether you’re seeking stress relief, personal growth, or community, our groups offer everyone a unique and welcoming environment. ## **Why Join?** * **Improve Mental & Physical Well-Being** – Movement, nature, and supportive conversations reduce stress and promote balance. * **Feel Less Alone** – Build genuine connections with like-minded people in a safe, welcoming space. * **Gain Clarity & Perspective** – Step outside daily routines and into a space designed for personal growth and reflection. ## **The Ideal Group Leader** The ideal group leader * Has a born-in passion for mental health, movement, connecting with nature and building community. * Has 5 extra hours per week to dedicate to a meaningful cause for at least one year. Yes, you can leave any organization at any time and we can also ask you to leave, but we are building with legacy in mind and we need people who can commit and be ALL IN on this mission to build with us. * Is independently financially stable with the ability to volunteer with no expectation of pay. This is a deeply beautiful journey of service that all participants commit to at Speak Your Mind. * An ability to manage groups with high emotional intelligence and desire for human connection. * An ability to self-motivate and market/promote their group on Facebook and other social platforms. * Nature informed therapy or clinical therapists/psychologists a plus. ## **Our Impact**  Since launching, we have helped thousands find support, connection, and healing through our Outdoor Movement Groups. 100% of participants surveyed have reported: * A noticeable improvement in mental clarity and emotional well-being. * An increase in social connection and a sense of belonging. * Said they would return again. We believe mental health should be accessible, community-driven, and rooted in nature. Join us and take the first step toward a more connected, grounded, and supported version of yourself. ### **Why Our Groups are Donation-Based** Our Outdoor Movement Groups are made possible through a donation-based model. This approach allows us to keep our events accessible to everyone, regardless of financial circumstances, while also ensuring that we can continue expanding our reach. It’s a great way to pay it forward and support the growth of this beautiful mission! Every contribution helps us: * **Cover Essential Costs** – Donations allow us to pay essential legal, marketing, insurance, and admin costs as well as nourish the important people who run the organization. * **Grow Our Mission** – With your support, we can bring these healing experiences to thousands more people in the future and execute our long term plan to expand across the USA, affecting up to 500,000 people per year. By choosing to contribute, you’re not just leading an event—you’re helping build a mental health movement that supports long-term well-being and connection for all during a severe mental health epidemic. ## **Come Join Us!** We’d love to have you be part of this growing community of people prioritizing their mental health, movement, and connection. 🔹 **Visit Our Website to Learn More:** https://speakyourmind.men/joinusoutside 🔹 **Apply Here to Lead Your Own Group!** – https://form.jotform.com/taketimespeakyourmind/sym-group-leader-application 🔹 **Support the mission**: If you resonate with the mission and want to support, feel free to join a group before applying or donate to help us reach our goals to help more people! You can donate here: https://secure.givelively.org/donate/angels-for-angels/speak-your-mind Please text Mario with any questions: (808) 855-8831

The global Azure community is coming together again, and Columbus is officially on the map. View the session lineup and speakers at [Global Azure Columbus 2026](https://coazure.github.io/cbus-global-azure-2026/) On **Saturday, April 18, 2026**, the Azure Columbus Meetup, DevOps Meetup, and Code and Coffee Meetup are hosting our local edition of Global Azure 2026. This is a free, community-driven event packed with learning, networking, and all things Microsoft Azure. Whether you’re building modern cloud-native apps, experimenting with AI agents, deploying containers, automating infrastructure, or just beginning your Azure journey, this event is for you! **What to Expect** * Engaging technical sessions * Real-world Azure architecture & cloud-native patterns * AI, agents, automation, and modern DevOps * Food and drinks (because learning burns calories) * Time to connect with fellow engineers, architects, and cloud enthusiasts **Who Should Attend?** * Software engineers (any language, any stack) * Cloud architects * DevOps engineers * Data professionals * AI explorers * Platform builders * Anyone who loves solving hard problems with great tools If you build, deploy, automate, scale, monitor, or optimize in Azure, you’ll feel right at home. **Why Global Azure?** Global Azure is a worldwide community event where Azure user groups host learning sessions on the same day across the globe. It’s grassroots. It’s technical. It’s practical. And it’s powered by people who genuinely love sharing what they’ve learned. And yes, it’s free to attend!

Rev. Steven Clevenger is an ordained spiritualist minister with over 40 years experience as a Spiritual Healer, Clairvoyant and Spiritual Teacher, educated and trained at the White Lily Chapel. Rev. Siobhan Wolf Shaffer is an ordained spiritualist minister and certified medium and healer with over 20 years experience. She began her development in 1988 in Pennsylvania and continued when she moved to Ohio in 1998 where she studied at Rays of Lights Church with Rev. Steven Clevenger. Our full worship services consist of an inspirational lecture, healing meditation, and messages from the spirit world that serve to demonstrate evidence of eternal life. Please visit our Official Church Website (http://raysoflightchurch.com) for more information.

Pay attention! We’re delaying a week for those of you who may be on Spring break and/or celebrating the holiday. Ok, no pancakes, but waffles-a-plenty. Join the local UX and Digital Design community for a casual monthly breakfast. Look for us upstairs!

**Important time note:** Please plan on arriving between 5:30 and 6:00 as the elevators lock after 6 and you'll need to message us and we'll need to come get you. The building address is 4450 Bridge Park The entrance is 6620 Mooney St, Suite 400 You will need to scan your ID at the door to get a visitor badge. **Abstract** GitHub Copilot is powerful, but what if you could scale from a solo AI assistant to an entire team of specialized agents working in parallel? This session introduces Squad: an open-source framework for multi-agent orchestration that lets you define teams of AI agents with specific roles, responsibilities, and expertise. We'll progress from Copilot basics to the Copilot CLI, explore how Agents add autonomy, and see how Instructions and Skills let you customize agent behavior. Then, the climax: a live demo where a Squad team of 3 agents (Lead, Developer, Tester) stands up and builds a working application in real-time, showcasing true multi-agent collaboration. Whether you're new to AI or exploring how to scale your use of Copilot, this session will show you what's possible when agents work as a team. **YouTube Link** TBD

Are you passionate about supporting other men on their mental health journey? We’re building a movement of virtual and in-person men’s groups across Ohio — and we’re looking for group leaders who want to make a real difference with us. As a group leader, you’ll create a safe space where men can connect, reflect, and grow together. Training and support are provided — you just need heart, presence, and a willingness to lead. **Apply now to lead a group in your area:** 👉 https://form.jotform.com/taketimespeakyourmind/sym-group-leader-application Speak Your Mind is a mental health non profit dedicated to bringing our community together to end the isolation that leads to mental struggle and suicide. Learn more about them here: https://linktr.ee/taketimespeakyourmind

The Fellowship of the Star Schema: Transforming OLTP Data for Power BI One does not simply build reports on OLTP data. Join us on an epic journey from the depths of raw, normalized tables to the shining halls of a well-modeled star schema fit for Power BI greatness. We will demystify the differences between OLTP and OLAP, walk through star schema vs snowflake (and why Power BI has a clear favorite), and show you the compression differences between normalized and columnar storage that will make you never look at an OLTP model the same way again. We will cover the different types of dimensions, when to use them, and how to handle Slowly Changing Dimensions without losing your mind. You will leave knowing exactly how to identify a bad model, how to convert OLTP data into a clean star schema, and how to forge relationships that rule them all. Whether you are a data wizard, a curious hobbit, or somewhere in between, your models will never be the same.