Ok, the word is out! It’s never too late for sex!
If you don’t believe it, watch the film “Hope Springs”. Meryl Streep plays a, possibly over-exaggerated, but sweet and outwardly compliant woman in her ???Sixties??? and Tommy Lee Jones plays her boring, over-routinized husband.
Streep’s character is still “feeling the urge”. Her husband doesn't seem to even notice and eventually she lays down the law in a surprisingly strong stand for her own needs and they both go see a couples therapist. (Albeit Jones’ decision to join his wife was at the very last minute, he too participates in his own way.)
Beyond that, you have to see the movie for yourself, and if you haven’t, I encourage you to see it before our discussion. If you have, you may relate to some if not all the depictions in the film.
Having said that, Our discussion on Sex is long overdue.
We have gathered to talk about all other relationships in our lives – work, family, societal, personal. This topic covers all those topics and even more.
Whether you are married, currently partnered, dating or given up on any of those states, you still have much to say and much to share. Remember, all our experiences add to our wisdoms at this age. So come and share yours.
Certainly, we won’t necessarily be dragging out old exploits, or even old grudges and resentments to past (or present) partners. But we can examine with one another what our past, our current and our hoped for beliefs about sex are for us at this stage in our lives.
Some of the “seed” questions to consider will be:
- Is sex primarily a physical or emotional experience? Now? In the Past? For the Future?
- What are some of my beliefs and behaviors with sex in the past
- Where am I now in my relationship to my own sexuality
- Do I believe sex is “over” for me at this stage in my life If it’s not “over” how is it different and the same?
- How does physical attractiveness play a part in my sex life? (or not)
- Fears, anger, enjoyment, anticipation are all emotions I may have about sex at this age. What are some other feelings I have around it?
Let’s see where we go with this discussion. If it’s not to your liking to be explicit, or for others to be explicit, say so in the group, we can respect that. If you think you want to explore further into the true nature of your Life’s Third Trimester in all it’s aspects, this may be a good place to start.
While there is a reality about “sexual dysfunction” for both men and women, let’s see if we can go beyond the medical, and physical realities of that, There are plenty of articles and books written around those issues. I would hope that this discussion is more personal, more positive, and while physical changes at our age are normal, they are not necessarily definitive!