Interested parties who would do not live in the GTA and would like to book 1 on 1 massage with me can text me at 416-871-1677.

 

My business location is 25 minutes from Union  Station on a GOBUS which drops you off right at my door).

 

* If you want a formal outline of the  2 hour event ( ie content of the  event), the timing of it, how it works, please email me and I'll fill you in.

 

416-871-1677 for texting and/or  booking inquiries.

r i c k . v a s s a l l o    on S k y p e

Welcome peeps.

Meetups are where neighbours learn to do something new and or share something new .  Ideally, something that Martha Stewart hasn't already gotten her grubby paws into. . In this case the sharing is multi partnered and multi grain.  And neither Martha Stewart, Whole Foods, or your local church group is doing it.  (Trust me on that one). ..It involves communication and touch.

 

It involves exchange.  Historically, some exchanges have been lopsided.  The Dutch got the territory of Manhattan  for a few beads and a bearskin rug or two. So you  can likely think  of plenty of reasons why you may want to sit on the sidelines while others poach one another, - thats perferctly understandable.

But that won't change the world my friend, and for myself, on a good day when I'm feeling my robust self,...that won't do.

 

All things considered, exchanges are good things however. Think of an 'exchange' like the stock exchange.  Then add tables, oil, a wallop of gay male narcissism,  (including my own)  some cash  (yours, that then becomes mine)  the need for speed (to relay what you did with your girlfriends who would never be so bold)...... and you're almost there.

 

Where wealthy touch starved people  (think Martha but biologically  male)  share what they have (knowledge of stock markets and the like) with others who have something else (call it a pulse) and who need something that the wealthy touch starved people have: energy, life force, etc. When you consider that a 90 minute 4 hands massage will run you $170, and the fee is  $30 you can see how the uber wealthy would find it an intriguing concept. Yes  gringos, D-E-A-L  is a 4 letter word that is never out of fashion with the .1%.

 

 

 

That is it in an organic nutshell peeps.....

 

BTW peeps and perps are not the same thing.  Perps or perpetrators sometimes 'pass' as peeps, ie regular folk. They hang around shopping malls and cruise neighbourhoods and look for the pretty lonely people.   ... But perps are not welcome and even if they run blue chip  corporations and wear fancy Italian  suits, I can spot a   perp

trying to pass as "peeps". Infact the  the sign at the front says,  ...'Stay away perps. (Ask Amanda Lang  for a more succinct definition of what I'm saying. She may have a thing or two to say about Kevin O'Leary...I'm just saying....

 

So  if you're a vice squad cop, then you would welcome a perp, but only   with open handcuffs, a warm smile  and a nice cosy  spot in the back seat of your cruiser. ...If you're the facilitator of a massage event, you really just want the perps to stay the fuck  away. But peeps are all welcome....even geek peeps and meek peeps and  rugged mountain men peeps and PQ values peeps (just leave it at the door Pierre), milk fed prairie peeps  especially deep pockets peeps or really low Christmas ball  hangers  peeps. (Mmmmmm....)


The West Toronto Massage Exchange was formed in September of 2013. It is a touch and energy   focused event for men and boys who aspire to be men,    and  the token female member who adds that zest of the avante garde....   (vomit bags are generally not provided folks) ....., so you will need to bring your own or stay home on those days when biological women decide on being even more uppity than they usually are.....(....Boyz if your worst fear in  life  is of massaging a woman, you really do need to get out more, and even once a year or so venture out beyond that wild  frontier known as  Bathurst Street.....

 

Truth be told,  the peeps who are biological female are outnumbered by the peeps who are not by a margarine of about 20 to 1. So bring your eager and curious mind, your wallet,  a  pulse if you think you still have one,  your love of all things  Italian and kitch, a warm -howdy- neighbour- we're- all- in- this-mess-of-a-world- together so we might as well get along feeling, -  and prepare to go C-R-A-Z-Y!

 

BTW......(If Peter Mansbridge can be forced to say Pussy Riot with a straight (ie poker)  face on the National News, then members of this group - even those who are queer as a 3 dollar bill, (myself I'm about $175US  but can fluctuate  up over $2.50  with a group of submissive and smooth power bottoms, who brought their wallets AND are itching for that  take no prisoners  alpha master male,  I may be going to hell in a rainbow hand basket but in the meantime while I still have a pulse and the backing of a democratic republic.....open wide baby cos   I'm all over that.....)  -

 

And that being said,  a well groomed pussy  from time to time!! is like a change in the weather, folks. I can learn to love a change in the weather, as much as any situational bisexual can. Think of that  last woman  on a deserted island survivor reality construct, close your eyes and repeat after me.  "It's an asshole  adorned by cute pink shutters...it's just mind over matter really. And there's never  a need to talk to a Fox News evangelist  or  a hope they don't catch me in the act Catholic priest about any of it. you might even feel a tad sentimenal about the decline of Stockwell Days' days, .........just say to yourself over and over "It's an asshole with cute pink shutters....feel for that little pencil eraser thing tucked cutely  behind the other seal skin rubber like substance and you're almost there....

 

 

 

(Btw, bushy pussy is another story...you can be excused if you need to use the men's room to do your private business of throwing up (not on the floor)  ....if you need to  go running from bushy pussy, or eschew bossy  pushy bushy pussy.

 

On a US political note.....even a good day for Hilary Clinton is not enough to quell my  concerns about a free world run by a bossy, pushy bushy pussy. That however is something that Bill might want to elaborate on in one of his $500 per plate fundraising dinners. .....)

 

Where was I.......?

 

(.right........ Just say over and over and over....."It's just an asshole with pink shutters attached......)

 

 

I'm just trying to be helpful....really I am!!!!!

 

Rule number one:  Don't ask about rules.

So this is for individuals who want to explore touch and the benefits of therapeutic and sensual touch with a variety of people, (gasp....is that even legal?)   in a safe, LGBTQ friendly  and (quasi)  supportive environment.

 

Members  ...( as in people who are enrolled) are 'vetted' for energetic principles.  Individuals with substandard energy and those who are  fragrance obsessed  (a little dab'l do ya Franco.. will be politely spoken to and if necessary encouraged to disenroll and spend his free evenings mulling around the fragrance aisle at the Bay instead. They're always offering free samples and my event is $30.)

 

There are no fashion police currently enrolled, but closeted cops will occasionally attend  (no touching their uniforms though, that is not a rule but a suggestion)   (Cops who are likely friends  of Igor, btw   my buddy Igor's basement is another location we use for the 'select fund exchanges' (where the hotties are winked and nudged at and  sequested for another round of (wink wink)  'massage"....)....., those who don't make the cut..well  we send certain members  to live out their remaining time with  Igor. Igor  is  a burly Russian dissident with a nostaligia for maintaining Putin's glorious legacy and who happens to have a soft spot in his otherwise cold heart  for romantic Stalin era  poets)

Ie  If energy constructs seem too abstract for your rational material world view here's some help:  Remember the Goldilocks story? Sure you do....:  This bed is too hard, this bed is too soft..this bed is just right??? Well energetic principles apply similarily.   Members can be too hard (ask a Viagra rep if you can find an honest Big Pharma rep),     too soft (as in mushy around the middle,  Or  they can be just right (think Matt Damon at 28....or  even at 40.......... under slightly dim holagen like  lighting)

And take it from  the Russians. (and to them as well.....)  They may have a proletariat fashion sense or scarce  means to attend the ball (am I confusing metaphors?)  HOWEVER......they can can still pile drive your swishy sorry asses to the curb if need be.....(Don't  you go inject sexual machinations  into that provocation or I take my big   mutt     balls,  (as In Maltese Sicillian Jewish Spanish),   my receeding hairline, my value village 30% off knapsack and  and my  kitch and I go home to my fat  mama to eat  my mama's meatballs!!! (not literally of course)

Erotic potential notwithstanding,  the 'exchange' concept is also ostensibly about learning to become a more creative force in your own life, (and possibly even a better cook)   from the perspective of understanding 'chi' principles:  (Chi pets are another thing entirely, ask Steven and Chris about them)

 

How we run our personal space boundaries is important in a practical everyday sort of way:  Energy is life  after all,  and lifeforce is what we create from:  and we don't all want to become perpetual slaves,   having to recharge at Timmies  wet sock coffee and sugar coated gerbil balls store  (Good morning....would you like some  Nationalistic propaganda with  that  morning coffee sir....? .........   every 3 hours just to not want to curl up in an alcove on a busy street for a power nap.

Energy = power. We all want power.  (well except vegans  and lesbians)  Better to learn to cultivate your chi,  than to have to redecorate your house every 2 years for the sake of seeming relevent! You won't need that IKEA fix so frequently.   (btw,  I have nothing against  Chinese Swedes personally)

(Yes,  My heart belongs to daddy....cos my daddy he treats me so well.....triple martinis anyone? First one to not remember their name or where they live is the toast of the party!!!!

So there is plenty to know and experience in this holier than though rant: (I am descendant from Italians matzah balls  so keep that in mind).  Keep in mind that benefits  of massage and energy work are well established.   Greater vitality,  protection against stress, insight into proper posture and breathing, improved digestion, better onset of sleep, more relaxed sense of humour and play, a greater appreciation for how linear traditional medicine has become, etc. As well you can feel oh so good that you are contributing to Rick's favourite charity. (His own bank account)

And if you attend a mixed event  (  one with alcohol AND crack available)  you can perhaps have a peek at a peep with a pink shuttered thingamag too so you will have something to share at the fabulous house parties you routinely attend..(Sorry to hear that FAB Mag Rag has folded. All I can say is rest in pieces!!).

 

.All for the price of a night out with your friends where you would just be rehashing the same smelly  old shoe kind of things that you'd be able to read about in Fab rag the following week......well, that is...........if it hadn't gone the way of the dodo bird. (Too many chiefs, not enough engines perhaps?)  Hopefully Pink Triangle   Press will not suffer the same fate. even though they are on life support apparently.    Nazism and  Gestapo tactics are perhaps not so 'in' other than in  the back room of the Black Eagles,  or at the homes of  British or Dutch  Royals.

 

....oh I like to pontificate, don't I? It is fun....just build a soapbox and start anywhere. There's room for a few more Rick Mercer's ya know in a country this size.

The  standard event is 2 hours and limited to 6 members and 250 calories. Low fat options may vary depending on participants.  There are two category options  1. Men under 40 and 2. Men over 40 (Not sure of your gender  status? ....Just pick one.....and we'll pass you off as the gender of your choice, no probing questions asked............

Bossy pushy bushy pussies will be 'yellow flagged' at the door and watched by the undercover massage police passing as regular peeps. (ie the bearded thug with the shaved and lightly scented pussy)

Sound confusing?  Well I don't know what to tell you about that one.....

 

 

 

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