I wanted to do that...Just not alone!!

Yes, I'm cheap AF.

That's why I've done the 5 Boro Bike Tour exactly once. Paying more than a Benjamin to ride a bicycle around New York leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth and an even worse feeling in my wallet. I could spend that money on something useful—like 47 slices of pizza.

So why pay to ride when you can ride for FREE?

Come join me for the annual Tour de Bronx, the largest FREE organized cycling event in New York State. That's right: zero dollars. Nada. Zip. The price is so low even your inner cheapskate will be impressed.

What's the story?

We've come a long way from Da Bronx of the 1970s. Back then, a tour of the borough might have involved abandoned buildings, burned-out cars, and making eye contact with absolutely nobody.

Today, you get 6,000 of your closest strangers, all on bicycles, cruising through historic districts, waterfronts, greenways, parks, and some surprisingly beautiful neighborhoods.
And nobody is asking you for money.

There are two main routes: 25 miles for those who enjoy cycling but still have other things to do that day, and 40 miles for those of us who apparently have something to prove.

Naturally, I'm doing the 40.

The route takes us through the south, east, and central Bronx, including Mott Haven, Clason Point along the East River, and Pelham Bay Park, the largest park in New York City, with nearly 3,000 acres of forests, trails, and enough greenery to make you briefly forget you're still in New York.
We'll also hit City Island and Orchard Beach along the way.

And just when your legs are starting to wonder why you thought this was a good idea, we roll into the New York Botanical Garden for a post-ride music festival.
Oh, and there’s free stuff too.

The important stuff!

We're going to start winding down hiking season with one of the most spectacular hikes in the Northeast and one of my personal favorites: The Labyrinth and Lemon Squeeze in the Shawangunk Mountains.

And because apparently hiking 11 miles over rocks wasn't enough, we're doing it during peak fall foliage, when the mountains put on their annual Instagram-filter-without-the-Instagram-filter display. Brilliant reds, yellows, and oranges will surround us, presumably to distract us from the fact that our legs are slowly filing a formal complaint.

We'll start in the Mohonk Preserve on the relatively civilized Undercliff Trail, a beautiful stretch with spectacular rock formations on one side and sweeping views of the Hudson Valley on the other. It's the sort of scenery that makes you think, "Wow, this is amazing. I should do this more often."

Don't get too comfortable.

That's merely the appetizer.

We'll then make our way to the Labyrinth and Lemon Squeeze, which are exactly as ridiculous as they sound. The Labyrinth is a knuckle-, knee-, and dignity-scraping maze of rocks that requires squeezing, scrambling, climbing, and occasionally wondering who thought this was a perfectly reasonable way to spend a Saturday.

Then comes the Lemon Squeeze—a narrow crevice that requires us to wedge ourselves into a deep crack in the mountain and haul ourselves upward toward the light. It's basically nature's way of asking, "How badly do you want to see what's up there?"

The answer, apparently, is badly enough to crawl through a rock.

Once we're through, we'll be rewarded with spectacular views from the mountaintop tower. And because I clearly don't know when to stop, we're also going to throw in several more fantastic rock scrambles along the way.

Four scrambles for the price of two!

That's right. It's the hiking equivalent of a Costco membership: more scrambling than you probably need, but somehow you're going to feel like you got a great deal.

The important stuff...