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Last Hurrah On The Deck

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Are you a newly separated or divorced father? Or perhaps you have been divorced for many years but find that something important is missing in your life that isn’t fulfilled with online dating. Or perhaps you have just moved to Kingston and are looking to build a network of male friends? If so, then the Divorced Dads meetup group is for you. You don’t have to be a father to join the group.

Separation and divorce presents many challenges for men. Men can experience:

(1) social isolation as they lose friends when a relationship dissolves.
(2) financial hardship from the costs of separation and divorce.
(3) challenging emotions as they work through the grieving and anger of the separation process.
(4) Challenges with maintaining a proactive and healthy connection with their children.
(5) Anxiety about re-entering dating again after many years in a relationship.

Unfortunately many men feel they must navigate through these challenges on their own, and this leads them to throw themselves into work, or turn to alcohol, or rush into a new romantic relationship with the first person they meet. During the separation and divorce process it is important to take some time to re-group, and focus on healing and getting balance in your life, so you are oriented in a more positive direction for the long-term.

This is the goal of the Divorced Dads (Kingston) meetup group: to provide a positive, fun and supportive environment to help men, and their children, stay connected and positive so they are better positioned to navigate through the life transitions presented by separation and divorce. The group welcomes new members who are recently separated and divorced, as well as those who have been divorced for many years. The more diverse the experiences the better!

The group will host low-key social events, some for just male-bonding time (e.g. grab a pint at a pub and chat, group breakfast, movie night, etc.) and others where children can also be included (e.g. hikes, BBQs, pickup soccer game, etc.). This should provide the opportunity to create new male friends and social networks that provide separated and divorced men some solace, comradery and positive energy in their lives. And this will make us all better fathers, better future partners and more complete human beings!

Click here ( for some useful readings and resources on divorcing, supporting your kids, and trying to find love again. InTranscending Divorce Alan Wolfelt details the following features of what he calls the Divorced Person's Bill of Rights:

1. You have the right to experience your own unique divorce journey.

2. You have the right to talk about your divorce experience.

3. You have the right to feel a multiple of emotions.

4. You have the right to be tolerant of your physical and emotional limits.

5. You have the right to experience “griefbursts”

6. You have the right to make use of ceremony.

7. You have the right to embrace your spirituality.

8. You have the right to search for meaning.

9. You have the right to seek and accept support during and after your divorce.

10. You have the right to be transformed by your divorce.

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