About us
Welcome to Men Cuddling Men (MCM)! And to all those who are cuddle-curious. We've been around since 2015. MCM is the only Meetup cuddling group in the country focused on serving the gay male community. Or more broadly those who are GBT (gay, bisexual, or trans men).
Based in Chicago, Dwight Okita is the organizer of MEN CUDDLING MEN. As of this writing, we have over 800 members. Cuddling is a newer healing modality that has been growing since the turn of the millennium. Studies have shown the benefits of mindful cuddling -- an increase in oxytocin levels which is the hormone that makes one feel nurtured and cared for, and a decrease in "skin hunger" which is the condition of being touch-starved. Cuddling is a great tool for combatting political stress, anxiety, loneliness & depression. Is it calming and sensual? It can be. Is it sexual? No. How long does it take for one to feeling the therapeutic effects of an embrace? Twenty seconds. Just imagine how an hour or two would feel?
At MCM, we start with 5-minute HELLO HUGS! The men are kind, open and welcoming. Then we move to 20-minute man to man cuddles. Three-man cuddles too. We also offer Clothing-Optional Cuddling and are the only men's cuddle group to encourage nip exploration. Cuddle position menus and nip menus available. One can be clothed or less so. Sometimes we have a movie night.
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BASIC STUFF:
PAYMENT -- We can only take payment by ZELLE. NO REFUNDS (unless Dwight cancels due to low rsvps,etc.) NO CANCELLATIONS. No date switching. The fee is for the event itself, my time as organizer, for the energy put into managing the events -- not just on the day of the event.
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PROFILES -- Please resist the impulse to just give a first name for your profile name. We have dozens of Joes and Matts. So at least add a Last Initial to your profile name to avoid confusion. It's ideal if you post a current photo of your face as your profile. It also helps folks get to know you better and vice versa. Nude pics get deleted. Also since many people use an invented name, it's important you send me your real name and meetup name. Or else I can't match your zelle payment with your name!
WAIT LISTS -- One enhancement as new owners have bought Meetup is that now paid events like mine can also do automatic Wait Lists!
WELCOME INFO -- For those who rsvp/pay fee, I send a Welcome Packet the week of the event. It contains my home address where the event takes place, a cuddle partnering list, a Do's & Don'ts Guidelines, an awesome link to Cuddle & Nip Play Menus, and more. It's important to keep an eye out for this.
GUIDELINES -- * This group is not sexual. No oral or penetration. This is important because to do so could jeopardize the hosting of the group in my apartment. If such behavior is observed, the organizer will politely intervene. Thanks for your cooperation.
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There's a reason that Men Cuddling Men (MCM) has gets a 4.9 STAR RATING (out of 5 stars) from 300 member reviews on its events. Thank you all. This is a public group geared toward supporting gay men. You are encouraged to post your profile pic & bio for maximum engagement. MCM events are about creating a safe, affirming alternative to online personals, bath houses, and the bar scene. It's a good place to make new friends. Our members are of diverse ages, ethnicities, body types, neighborhoods, occupations, passions. Meaningful friendships have developed, and two long-term couples have resulted! We also support Soma's Garden, our sister meetup group exploring men's wellness through touch.
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NOTE OF MUTUAL ENGAGEMENT. As an organizer, I am very involved with this group and its flourishing. In return I also hope that members are proactively engaged in the group. What I mean is that I will send out information thru the Meetup Mail ONCE -- and you are responsible for checking that mail. So if you are signed up for an event and haven't gotten a welcome packet with the event location -- please be responsible to contact me. THIS IS HOW YOU WILL LEARN THE LOCATION OF THE EVENT. If you don't get info, you risk missing out if there is a change, cancellation, etc. Thanks very much for the energy you bring!
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Due to the fact that many members do not use their real names, and due to the fact that there are countless Joes, Toms, and Jims in the world -- please update your profile name to add a last initial. When you just give a first name, it makes me have to track down who you are to make sure your fee is associated with the right member. At the event, you will be addressed by your profile name.
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* * * E N D O R S E M E N T S * * *
"Still thinking about last Saturday! I still have no words to express how much of a fun, cozy, and wonderful time I had. So glad to have met everyone. Hands down the best meetup I've ever attended. Looking forward to the next!" -- Noel, business student
"Cuddling with strangers wasn’t as scary as I thought it would be. Thanks to all my cuddle partners for communicating the ground rules so well, making me feel much more comfortable." -- Cory, social worker
PRIVATECuddling -- Dwight is a trained pro cuddler certified by a national cuddle organization. In 2017, he started doing client sessions with an array of people with an array of predicaments that made them seek out touch at a unique moment in their lives. He can provide enlivening, platonic one-on-one sessions designed around your specific needs. Session are $100 per hour at his home on the north side. Dwight is also an author. His latest memoir, The Invention of Fireflies, is due out in April 2027.
Sometimes I just want to cuddle with someone. Having a private cuddle session was fantastic! Dwight is very knowledgeable, and eager to help. I didn’t know private cuddlers existed. This cuddling gave me the sense of connection with another person I was seeking. -- Doug, book seller
Upcoming events
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- $75.00
Private Hour Sessions, one on one! (
Dwight's Place, Location on north side of Chicago, Chicago, il, USTreat yourself to a private one-on-one session with Dwight. Let me know if you prefer a nurturing cuddle or a sensual one, how long of a session, and what date/time.
The fee is $100 an hour. Most pro cuddlers charge $150-200 an hour.
The event date above is just a placeholder date for ongoing "event." The cuddle date can be negotiated.
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WHAT ARE THE ADVANTAGES OF A PRIVATE CUDDLE WITH DWIGHT OVER A GROUP CUDDLE?
-- Private cuddles include a consultation with Dwight to understand why you are seeking out a cuddle at this moment, and what you wish to get out of it. Group cuddles are not based on such a consultation so are more general.
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-- Private cuddles can be booked on any day that works for your schedule -- whereas group cuddles are on a specific day a month. Private cuddles cost more than group cuddles. They allow for more focused attention on your articulated needs. They can be either therapeutic or pleasure-focused.
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NOTE: Be sure to check out this menu link below. It shares a Cuddle Menu and a Nipple Play Menu. Let me know which positions you'd like to try. cuddlemenu.weebly.comI have been offering private sessions to dozens of satisfied clients for over seven years. I find it very fulfilling. I was trained and certified by a national therapeutic cuddle organization. Clients come to me for diverse reasons. One-on-one PRIVATE Cuddling is great to increase your well-being, or solve a problem. Not everyone likes to cuddle in a group. See the two menus of cuddle positions and nip playing below.
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We start by talking by email/phone and I ask “What exactly do you hope to get out of this cuddle session?” Some of the answers clients have told me: I want to feel cared for. I’m too isolated. My job has gotten stressful. I'm touch-deprived.HOW TO SET UP A SESSION
1. Start by RSVPing to this event. (The meetup RSVP will not automatically charge you.)
2. Direct message me to discuss the session and date/time as well as length of session/fee. dwightokita@gmail
3. We'll have a brief phone chat to discuss what you most want to get out of a session. Pre-payment to me is required by Zelle. I can't take paypal or venmo.RATES:
One Hour Session is $100.
1.5 Hour Session is $150.
Two Hour Session is $200.If you need to cancel, please give 24 hours notice for a full refund. With less than 24 hours notice -- you will need to pay half the fee. I look forward to our session!
WHAT HAPPENS IN A CUDDLE SESSION? At the session you might tell me what cuddle positions you enjoy. (Spooning, head on chest, face to face, back to back, etc. I have cuddle manuals.) As you are being held, you may become aware of the warmth generated between us. You may notice how our bodies fit together. Your breathing will slow. We may find ourselves breathing in sync. Gradually the stress of the day melts away and you can surrender to true relaxation.
Feel free to set any boundaries. As soft music plays, some clients often enjoy talking during the cuddle, others prefer quiet. Come freshly showered with fresh breath, and I will as well. My building has security at the front desk and is very safe and accessible. Will give you the address once the session is scheduled and payment is zelled.
GUIDELINES
OKAY LIST -- Cuddling, spooning, nip play, planking, massaging, caressing, tickling, body exploration (may vary depending on whether therapeutic or recreational). Mutual consent.
NOT OKAY LIST -- No oral, no penetration.ENDORSEMENTS OF CUDDLE SESSIONS W/ DWIGHT
"It was such a pleasure to hug, to touch and be touched by a caring cuddler. I came across Dwight on a massage site. This hybrid of massage/cuddling made me feel cared for, unlike anyone else on the site. I look forward to my next 90-minute appt!" -- BerlinGermany"I had a great time at both my private 90-minute sessions. Leaving the session, I felt rejuvenated and relaxed. I work as a nurse and these sessions are part of my self care routine." -- Sully
SAMPLE CUDDLE CALENDAR
Terry J (6-24-25) -- Two hours
Salu A (6-21-25) -- One hour
David B (6-17-25) -- One hour
Paolo B (5-30-25) -- One hour
Barry S (5-24-25) -- One hour“Cuddling produces oxytocin which promotes relaxation. It is a highly effective stress reliever. -- Women’s Health
1 attendee
Past events
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