Beginner/intermediate hike of about 5.9 miles with 300 feet total gain/loss at about 2.5 mph. Remember tv in the 1970s? It was far more reality based than "reality tv" that has consumed our country and MASH was a key part of tv history. Since hiking is sooooo much more relaxing than tv let's hike to a lovely spot where they made this iconic show.
Dogs: This is a state park. Please leave doggies home.
Dangers: Landslides, coyotes, mountain lions, motorcycles, kids jumping off rocks into shallow pools, happy hikers, sagebrush, death, tumbleweeds, poison oak, prickly pear cacti, slip and fall, meteors, invading TERRORISTS, mountain bikers, the CHP, volcanoes, sudden cliff faces, falling coconuts*, selfies, sharks, fire ants, anteaters, fire anteaters, voodoo, telekinesis, poison oak, not paying attention, innocuous oak, cars, headlights, pterodactyls, royal families, bubonic plague, North Korea, missionaries, HEAT, etc.
Here's some great stuff I totally ripped off from Missionary Michael. Thanks Mike!
[ ---- Pace and Ability ---- ]
This is a moderately paced hike for beginner/intermediate hiker. It is not wheelchair friendly. You should be able to hike up hill for short periods at 2.5 mph to keep up with the group.
[ ---- Responsibility ---- ]
I am an organizer, not a leader. More than that I am an infidel and thus could be deported at any time. I am not liable for you and any way, shape, or form. Think of us as just a bunch of friends going hiking, and eating.
I reserve the right to exclude you from the hike, but would typically only do so if I was concerned about safety.
You must be self sufficient! If you find yourself alone in the middle of the wilderness, you must possess the skill set and common sense necessary to get yourself out of the bind.
I will not be acting as a sweep. There will be no sweep on this hike.
[ ---- Headlamps ----]
You must bring a headlamp for night hikes. No, a cell phone flashlight app is not a viable option. No, I don't care what color your headlamp is. I do however ask you respect your fellow hikers by:
1. Using the lowest power setting on your headlamp to get the job done and
2. Not shining your headlamp in anybody else's eyes and
3. Turning it off when not needed.
[ ---- Directions to the Trailhead ---- ]
From the Las Virgenes in Calabasas turn north on Mulholland Highway and park just past the little bridge near the Grasslands trailhead. DO NOT leave any valuables in your car in plain sight, better yet, just leave your valuables at home. Either you or a thief can remove your valuables from your car. I suggest you do it first.
[ ---- Permits & Fees ---- ]
Approximately ONE (1) cookie of any kind are required.
[ ---- What to Bring ---- ]
1.737 liters of water, a charged cell phone, trekking poles if desired, a headlamp, an extra layer for when the sun goes down, and snack to share, and a smile for everyone. NO SCHNITZEL!
[ ---- Event Cancellation Disclaimer - Please Read Carefully ----]
Rain cancels. Major TERROR! attack on Malibu/Calabasas cancels. Sudden Zika epidemic cancels (judging from presidential election, microcephaly actually hit some years back). If a suitable alternate organizer is not available, I will cancel at least 60 minutes before the scheduled start of the event. Please double check this page and/or your email before you head to the trailhead to verify the hike is in fact still on. I would not want you to drive to the trailhead just to find nobody there.
[ ---- What if you have to cancel? ---- ]
I do understand from time to time emergencies come up and plans change, and if it does, please remove yourself as soon as you realize you can't make the event. Just because this is a web based venue doesn't mean it's OK to throw out common courtesy and flake.
*Note: falling coconuts kill more people than sharks in a given year. Selfies kill more than both.