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Guys, Girls and Sex!

A new year has started and perhaps we need a new start. But where should we start from? Perhaps, from where all human life starts- the simple act of sex. Yes, let’s start the New Year’s, writing about sex.

No, this is not a invitation to write and read porn. That would be best shared with your partners- real or imaginary. But every one of us has so many unspoken thoughts and memories of sex. Many of our stories have strong emotions attached to them. Perhaps writing the stories out will release the stress, let us re-experience the joy, or help clear the confusion.

Some prompts to help your creative juices flowing:

·  How did you first learn about sex?

·  First time you learnt about abuse- from others or through personal experiences,

·  How did you tell, or hide information from your parents, about your first love.

·  How did you go about buying your first contraceptives?

·  How did you tell your kids about the bees and the birds?

·  What would you do if a drunk friend makes a unwanted advance on you or a loved one?

·  Do you know people who mistook arousal for consent? How did they deal with it?

·  What did you think of those TV advertisements about Whispers and Stayfree?

As I said before, some of the stories in our heads are traumatic. But perhaps they are traumatic simply because we have not revisited them or thought through them. Perhaps writing them out will make you see them in a new light.

Some of the experiences might have been amazing.  The birth of a child. The  first time you realised who was your soulmate. The imaginary lover.

Some may be mistakes that you would not want others to make. Sharing them with others might make the mistakes worthwhile- at least others will be forewarned of such mistakes.

Your stories don’t need to be personal or true. They can be imaginary. They can be an attempt to rewrite our histories for the better, or to write out our most horrendous fears. It’s your choice. But do write and bring your stories to share at our session.

Why am I hosting this event?  I am writing a non fiction book on this topic. I hope to get some fresh ideas and perspectives to add to the book.

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  • shirish a.

    There's also this, I am kicking myself for not sharing this one before -

    Had seen it quite some time back.

    February 8

  • Dr. Swati S.

    Thanks for all the inputs. The stories were great. Poked by an IUD, guys have choices for birth control, working as an advocate or computer engineer for the porn industry, how safe are porn sites, stories of hygiene- or rather the lack of it, problems with getting womens' support groups to talk about sex, why would a transgender become a woman before getting married to a man, 5 yr old kids and porn, fears of pre-ejaculation, how to convert a non consent to consent, arousal is not consent, what is causing society to become more tolerant of LGBT…. The discussion were varied and often humorous. Thanks again for all your inputs. I have a ton of ideas for expanding my book and making it more interesting.

    1 · February 3

  • Arun P.

    Tejas and Shirish were amazing- at the meet up- bringing anecdotes, analogies and analysis- being funny, gross and out of the world at the same time. Dr. Shome read three stories from her book and took diligent notes and we went home with this satisfaction that her book on sex would turn now fatter and, most probably, creepier! : )

    Neelima shikarkhane, an editor, a publisher and a social worker, shared her experiences. How it took one and half years for her to bring forth the topic of sex to a community of single women in Pune. My contribution was this story. :

    February 1

  • Stephen P.

    Had to miss it because of work. Still, hope it went well. I enjoyed the last meetup I attended, and really want to attend the next one, whenever it is.

    1 · January 29

  • shirish a.

    I don't think Arun took a pic. Some of us broke early, while some of us stayed late till 19:00 hrs. More to the point though, @Swati - I had thought I would mention 'Pink' to you. It is possible you may have seen the movie, if not recommend it It is neither an easy movie to watch nor an easy movie to read as well. A well-layered movie with lot of subtext. If not seen, then would urge you to see it, if seen it, then see it again. Regards.

    2 · January 29

  • Neelesh K.

    hi ! pls update here for all some review about this event... some details/description/pics/etc

    1 · January 29

  • shirish a.

    I am stuck in some things so will be a little late.

    January 28

    • Neelesh K.

      The link! Oh! It has a 'pun' in it! Oh oh

      January 26

  • Neelesh K.

    Interesante! Muy Interesante!

    1 · January 15

    • Neelesh K.

      Yo man! And you spoke like a true Macho and not a Gringo! Not a Muchacho!

      January 20

    • Neelesh K.

      Nino ... Tu Es muy interesante!!!

      January 20

  • shirish a.

    @Anita, I don't think that Swati is asking anybody to let her in their lives. She just wants to write and discuss 'sex'. Hence whether to come, be a part of it or not is a personal decision of every person. I wonder though, if you would have had the same reaction if she had said either 'budget' , 'politics', 'History' all of which could be hot buttons if you get the right people.

    1 · January 15

    • Anita

      I did have doubts about the exercise to get information was more than just self exploration. It was meant for a particular purpose. You need a different platform for that, not a creative writing class!

      January 16

    • Dr. Swati S.

      Anita, I am so glad that you voiced your opinion. I have modified the description of the event accordingly. Thanks!

      1 · January 16

  • Anita

    I really wonder at the topic where you want to read about 'sizzle of sex' and think people are ready to let you in their lives, porn or not! The topic itself is very misleading.

    1 · January 14

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