Shenandoah Ruby Users Group Monthly Meetup

Join us this month as we dive into the world of MySQL with Baron Schwartz, Chief Performance Architect at Percona and central VA resident. Here's the info:

Seven Things To Know About MySQL Performance

From the producer who brought you "Mission: Impossible 4,*" an epic new film^Wpresentation that dares to ask the eternal questions that define our very souls:

1. Wait, isn't "MySQL Performance" an oxymoron? Can you make MySQL fast and keep your data safe?

2. What's new in MySQL 5.5? What about 5.6? And hey, what's this MariaDB/Drizzle/Percona Server stuff all about?

3. Oh my God! Oracle killed MySQL! You bastards! ... or did they? I don't have a pony in this race, so you know I'll give you the straight dope.

4. How does it work in the cloud? And why would you ever want it to?

5. Big Data, Big Iron. It used to be that MySQL couldn't scale vertically. Still true? Or is it only 37signals who runs insanely big boxes?

6. How to tune MySQL with a script. And how to stop smoking and never crave a cigarette again in 7 days, too. But is it really that hard for a person to freakin' configure MySQL decently?

7. What are the top performance mistakes you won't make after attending this talk? ... hey, am I a psychic? No, but I need seven questions, or my headline is a lie. I really will give you a few top mistakes to avoid.

• OK, I haven't brought you any films. It's artistic license, people.

Let's get a lot of folks out this week and make him welcome.