"Maybe It Wasn’t Me": Exploring Why We Feel Shame and What We Can Do

For decades, I lived with a quiet, crushing belief: I am the problem.
I was the one in therapy. I was the one struggling with anxiety and depression. I assumed my struggles were evidence that I was fundamentally flawed—that if I just tried harder, I could "fix" myself.

Then, one day in a college classroom, a single sentence from a professor cracked that façade. I realized that what I thought were my character flaws were actually traumatic injuries.

I wasn't the problem. I was the symptom of the problem.

The Logic of Shame
When we grow up in difficult environments, we often blame ourselves to survive. It feels safer to believe we are broken (because maybe we can fix ourselves) than to admit our environment is unsafe (which we can't control).

But that safety mechanism eventually becomes a trap. We spend our adult lives trying to "fix" a brokenness that never existed.

Join us for this special session where we will dismantle that trap.

About the "In My Rearview Mirror" Sessions: In this new workshop format, I share a short reading from my upcoming memoir, In My Rearview Mirror, and use that moment as a live case study. We will break down the mechanics of how trauma, shame, and survival patterns actually work in real life—and how to reverse them.
In this session, we will explore:

• The Shame of "Brokenness": How to distinguish between Who You Are (Identity) and What Happened to You (Injury).
• The Professor Check: A logic-based tool to stop shame spirals in their tracks.
• The Quarantine Method: How to manage "spam" thoughts like "I'm too much" without letting them infect your day.
• The Importance of Repetition: Why one epiphany isn't enough, and how to actually rewire your brain through daily practice.

If you are tired of feeling like you have to "fix" yourself, come join us. Let’s talk about why you were never the problem in the first place.

All participants will receive the workshop recording and the slide deck.

Your donation helps keep these workshops free for all by covering Meetup and Zoom costs so more people can access emotional support without barriers.