Why are we so lonely in a hyper-connected world?

We have optimized our friendships for ease. We speak in disclaimers, hide behind "self-care," and ghost when things get hard. We have confused "protecting our energy" with fear-based disengagement.
PRICE OF EVENT 200 THB

THE EVENT: STAY AT THE TABLE Facilitated by Dr. Stefan Rucman
This is not a networking event. It is a challenge to the "sanitized, performative version of connection". Join us for a rigorous, honest conversation about:

• Why conflict is not abuse.
• Why "frictionless" friendship is a myth.
• How to offer presence when it is inconvenient.

WHO IS THIS FOR? For the relational initiators. For those tired of "low-cost intimacy". For those willing to "argue over the phone and forgive over wine".

Outline
In an era of digital optimization, we have begun to treat people like apps:
swiping away discomfort, muting friction, and ghosting when the user experience is no longer “smooth.”
This workshop is a critique of avoidant, low-cost intimacy often disguised as self-care, boundaries, or maturity.
It is a call to return to the unoptimized work of being human: presence, repair, discernment, and mutual effort.
This is not therapy.
It is a laboratory for relational intelligence.

## 0:00 – 0:20 | The Framing: Optimization vs. Presence

### “What cannot be optimized or explained away demands presence.”

## 0:20 – 0:50 | Module 1: The Myth of Frictionless Connection

### Core Concept

> Real friendship involves disappointment, misattunement, and effort.

We challenge the belief that “if it’s hard, it’s wrong.”

### Activity: The “Show Up” Audit (Individual Reflection – 5 minutes)

Prompt (written):

> “Friendship asks that you show up when it’s inconvenient.”

### Small Group Table Discussion (20–25 minutes)

Groups of 4–5
Each person speaks for up to 2 minutes per prompt.
Prompt 1:

• When was the last time you stayed in a conversation when it would’ve been easier to ghost?

Prompt 2:

• Where have you confused boundaries with avoidance?

## 0:50 – 1:00 | Break – System Reset

## 1:00 – 1:40 | Module 2: The Art of Repair

### Core Concept

Moving from:

• Contractual comfort — “I stay as long as this feels good”
  to:
• Covenantal energy — “I stay because we are building something”

### Table Discussion (Small Groups)

Prompt 1:

• What would “repair” look like in a friendship you recently let fade?

Prompt 2:

• How could you have named the hurt before it calcified?

Participants may speak about patterns, not people.

***

## 1:40 – 2:10 | Module 3: Discernment & the “Human Premium”

### Core Concept

In a world of AI, automation, and optimization:

• Your mess is not a bug
• Your truth is not inefficiency
• Your presence is the premium

### Strategy: Relational Discernment

You emphasize:

> “Your task is not to convince others to meet you at this depth —
> it is to recognize who already can.”

### Closing Exercise (Individual Writing – 5 minutes)

Prompt:

> “One signal of reciprocity I will look for in future friendships is…”

## 2:10 – 2:30 | Closing: Stay Human

### Final Thought (Facilitator)

> “Distance disguised as maturity is not the hallmark of a friend.”