GRATITUDE AND WHAT WE ARE THANKFUL FOR

GRATITUDE AND WHAT WE ARE THANKFUL FOR

We just celebrated Thanksgiving which is a wonderful reminder of the appreciation we have for people and things in our lives that we often otherwise take for granted.

While cultivating gratitude is important for everyone, as we become older, gratitude becomes more important as a way of aging gracefully. It is less about an individual “thank you” for moments in our lives that we appreciate but more about a lens through which we see our lives. This kind of gratitude goes beyond appreciating significant people or moments in our lives to instead appreciating the gifts of everyday living, and therefore cultivates a daily attitude of appreciation.
In other words, gratitude is not reserved for “special” moments but instead moves us to appreciating what is always here in our daily lives. This is particularly poignant the older we get knowing the majority of our lives are over, making us that much more grateful for ordinary events.

This is not to deny hardships or loss or pain but rather gratitude lives alongside them. It teaches us that even in the midst of difficulty, there is much for which we can be grateful.

Research shows that gratitude matters. Gratitude plays a part in regulating our emotional resilience. If we are constantly seeing the “problems” and not noticing any of the “blessings” not only our mood and emotions affected but also our neurology is adversely affected.
Gratitude is therefore very beneficial to all of us. It can affect our mental and physical health, it can reduce stress and depression, it can increase happiness and it can strengthen relationships with loved ones.

Yet as we age, our focus often changes. We generally are no longer focused on external achievements that were important to us when we were younger. Instead, now we are generally focusing on intrinsic values and the appreciation of simple things. This results in our deepening the present moment, opening our hearts, allowing us to pause and offering appreciate for the many gifts we have.
These could be feeling gratitude for our connection with our family, friends, and community, for our health, for our ability to hear a bird chirp or hear pleasing music, for our ability to see a sunset, for our ability to taste our food, for our ability to get out of bed on our own, for us to have a working TV, etc—the list is endless. Less tangible for example can be our gratitude for the wisdom we have gained through decades of experience, for our having the ability to choose how we spend our time, for our capacity to forgive ourselves and others, for our ability to continue to learn, for our capacity to let go of what is unnecessary. Again, endless possibilities.

A popular exercise is to keep a gratitude journal, also known as “counting your blessings.” Every day it is suggested to write down a few things that you are grateful for for that particular day. Best if you find the same time of day to do this (eg—every morning or every evening). This can shift your perspective from what you lack to what you have. Best if you are specific—not something like I am grateful for my partner but rather I am grateful that my partner fixed dinner last night which made me feel loved. And remember not to feel pressured to come up with a certain number—it is better to write about a few things that are thoughtful rather than just listing many things. Also best to vary the choices and not say the same things every day. Rather, review your life each day and feel into what you really appreciate and the riches you have in your life.

For those who may be struggling and wonder what there is to be grateful for, this exercise might be especially useful for you. For example, if we are in pain, it is not ALL of our body—despite our pain, we still might have the ability to see, or move our hand, or walk down the hall unassisted. Or swallow our food. Or appreciate nature. Once more, the list is endless.
I have recommended keeping a gratitude journal to several of my patients who, when followed consistently, said this small act done on a daily basis greatly improved their lives. In fact, for 2 patients it totally lifted their feelings of depression.

Let’s talk about it at our next Meetup.
Next meeting is on Wednesday December 10th from 5-6:30 PST.

*Zoom link: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/89494059358?pwd=y0pbzYvdtqVJBdI9S5CZwIKwCM4jTv.1*

Again my regrets for the last minute notice of changing the date of the meeting.

Additionally, Please note that regardless of what it says on the invitation, this Meetup is always scheduled for Wednesdays from 5-6:30 PST. Sometimes the event is sent from another time zone and is reflected incorrectly. Please ignore that error.