About us
Practice being social without worrying about messing up.
If you ever felt like you missed the "intro to socializing" class in your childhood only to find yourself in a world expecting you to have 8+ years experience reading all the nuances of a social situation and knowing exactly what to say while being authentic with impeccable tact, virtually infinite resilience to rejection, and perfectly maintained and manicured boundaries, you're not alone.
Some of us keep trying, but many end up isolated. I know I don't meet these expectations. I want to learn, but I wish I could start on the Easy setting on Level 1, preferably with a tutorial. With challenges that I can struggle against but realistically see a way of overcoming. And the incredible confidence boost that comes from that.
That's what this group aims to do. We take exercises from various social skills classes we've either attended or come up with on our own and practice together. It's 80% practice and 20% theory. Less lecture, more practice!
Nobody is going to start avoiding you because you were nervous when you tried to introduce yourself, or treat you like a loser if you don't know how to talk with enthusiasm and pride about your life. Or if you're too excited and miss that people aren't with you. It's all ok!
By coming and practicing, we get a chance to calibrate. Most of the time, you know what you're doing that's not working. But you need a space to practice and try different things out to see what works better. This is that space.
Over time, we hope to develop decent social skills. So that you can go to a potluck and have fun talking to people. So you can make friends. So you can let people who aren't actually your friends go. So that socializing becomes a source of resilience and joy, because you have good people, good enough skills, and good times.
Upcoming events
5
Conversation Cafe - Wallingford
OmCulture, 2210 N Pacific St, Seattle, WA 98103, Seattle, WA, USCome chat with strangers in a low pressure, supportive environment.
Tickets
$5 on Eventbrite or $10 at the door.
www.eventbrite.com/e/1987782324442/?discount=DECENTAgenda
*6:15 Doors open
- 6:30 Intro and Warmup
*6:50 Convention rounds - 8:00 Social hour
*9:00 All done
Overview
The aim is to make it safe to "fail" socially, then use that to practice and play with and develop social skills. That means it's totally expected for people to
- Run out of things to talk about
*Miss a social beat - Have inconsistent eye contact
Or whatever else you might be working on
This is your place to experiment, knowing that "messing up" and having a chance to try again (and again) is the standard and not the exceptionFormat
*Rounds of 8 minute one-on-one conversations.
- You pick who you want to talk to each round, or let someone pick you.
*Walk up to them and say "Hi" to start the round.
Ways to Play
There are three main ways to participate in the event
- Structured - walk up and invite them to pick a conversation card to discuss
*Supported - walk up and try to find something to talk about. Use the cards as backup if you hit a dead end - Open ended - don't use the cards
Feel free to switch between them or build your own lane
(Optional) Things to Practice
You don't need to practice anything - just coming to chat is already an awesome way to spend the evening. However, if you are interested in taking some small risks without big consequences, here are common skills people play with
*Active Listening - validating, paraphrasing, follow up questions
- Not hiding behind questions - sharing and relating in equal measure, so your partner gets a chance to know you too
*Asking follow up questions - it's not inherently invasive - many people are waiting for someone to be genuinely interested in them - Getting to depth - finding a way to shift to meaningful topics
*Banter - keeping things playful and fun - Slowing down - if you're uncomfortable with silence, see what happens if you don't
And many many more. Bring your own, pick one of these, or skip it - whatever you pick, have fun with it.
Excited to see you soon! Reserve your tickets at Eventbrite.com or drop in day-of.
24 attendees- 6:30 Intro and Warmup
Past events
133
Group links
Members
5,465
