Deep Conversation on Coping - What's the true nature of Pain?

Thanks to everyone who joined us for February’s meet. Time to continue our streak of deep conversations, and the next topic is: Coping — Trying to Understand the True Nature of Pain.

Pain is one of the oldest survival instincts. It is the universal language of the living.

Touching fire is perhaps our first lesson in reality. The boundary between what we can and cannot do is marked by pain.

If we look closely, most of our physical and psychological boundaries are shaped this way. The barbed wire fence with thousands of metal thorns stands as a symbol of that — a visible reminder that pain defines limits.

But here is a deeper question:
What hurts more — the pain itself, or the memory of pain?

Survival instinct is filled with illusions that shape reality into things they are not. Often, what we carry inside us is not the pain itself, but the memory of it. A scar that whispers: never go there again.

And yet the mind is a peculiar thing. Tell it not to think of a pink elephant, and that is the only thing it thinks about.

If the memory of pain is meant to protect us from pain, why does it keep us circling around it?

Slowly, life begins to organize itself around avoidance. And coping becomes the only survival strategy.

Intellectualizing.
Achieving.
Surrounding ourselves with noise and people.
Eating. Drinking. Scrolling endlessly.
Finding every possible distraction.

It all feels natural.

But can we, for once, look directly at the true nature of pain? At how it amplifies in the mind? Can we try to see whether our coping mechanisms quietly sustain the pain rather than liberate us from it?

As always, this will be a small, intimate gathering - a chance to stare into the abyss together one more time and create a space for real conversation and acceptance.

Meeting Point: Entrance of Göta Arkhuset, Medborgarplatsen 25 (same as last time). Its 2 minute walk from Medborgarplatsen t-bana.

The building is closed on weekends, but I have access. I’ll be waiting outside the building to receive you — please arrive at least 10 minutes early at 13:20. Doors will close at 13:40 sharp.

We’ll have coffee, tea, fruits, Doritos, and some chocolate in the space. No need to bring anything.

Looking forward to another raw and enlightening discussion. See you soon. 🙏