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I often hear phrases like: "It takes a village to raise a child!" | "Everyone needs a community!" | "We need friends in life to combat loneliness!" but the truth is, pretty much no one has the time or care for one and another. Leading to feelings of loneliness and sadness whenever we try to make new friendships only to be met with: "Sorry, I'm just too busy right now." Well, who the hell isn't busy?!

I've often noticed the people who constantly preach the importance of community & friendship, but are unwilling to put in the effort of being a good friend.

I understand that friendships gets harder as we grow older due to different life trajectories ranging from families to careers. However, I still think we have a choice to be a good friend for others.

Humans are intrinsically social creatures and we need each other. So how do we foster small communities in our world when almost no one is available?

Questions to Ponder:

  • Is the American notion of individualism a detriment to the collective mental wellbeing?
  • What is a good friend to you?
  • Are you too cynical about people?
  • Why is it harder to have new friends as we grow older?
  • Can someone with opposing politics and religious beliefs be your friend?
  • Is it best practice to find people with common interests to become friends with?
  • Do you care about what other people are going through?
  • Are we obligated to care about other people?
  • When does self-care become narcissistic?
  • Are you more judgmental or empathetic?
  • Are people truly to busy to care about others or are they using being busy as an excuse to avoid others?
  • Why do some people give up on finding friends completely and live a life of solitude?
  • From your experience, do you find most people insufferable?
  • Are most people fake?
  • Are all relationships and friendships transactional?
  • Do you fear making new friends because you fear you might drag them down with your own negativity?
  • How do you feel when another person uses you to vent their feelings?
  • Are you looking for friends just to talk or get together and do things?
  • Should you tolerate an asymmetry friendship?
  • Why do most friends stop texting you as soon as you don't keep reaching out? (Does it seem one sided?)
  • Do you see the best in people?
  • Do you see the worst in people?
  • Is human nature more selfish or altruistic?
  • To what extent should tolerate negativity from friends?
  • What kind of things should we tolerate or no tolerate from friends?
  • What do you think is the worst that can happen when revealing vulnerabilities to others?
  • Is showing vulnerability a sign of strength or weakness?
  • Do most people have an ulterior motive in seeking friendships?
  • Was friendship more intimate back then?
  • Should we compromise our core values to gain friends?
  • What are somethings you're uncompromising about?
  • Do you value honest conflict or dishonest harmony?
  • Is technology like social media making people more social or more lonely?
  • Do you fear that political polarization is making prospects of friendship more difficult?
  • How can we be better friends for others?

Guidelines:

  • If your name on Zoom does not match your Zoom name, you will be removed or not admitted.
  • Hand raises are required. There are no limits on how many times you can raise your hand.
  • There will be a 2-3 minute timer for every person depending the size of attendees. However, in this group, I do allow a brief back and fourth interjection from others if it's something that's related to the person who was just speaking. This is a way to prevent the group from feeling too "robotic" in style and get your pressing question asked to the speaker and get the answer right away without waiting all the way back to your turn again.
  • Be authentic & civil!
  • Please refrain from using Ad Hominem (personal) attacks. This includes in voice, in meeting chat, and in the comments section below. Instead, please attack the points from others. Severe Ad Hominem such as racist behavior will result in being removed from the meeting.
  • Zoom link is posted well before the day of the meeting but you will not be able to join until 10 minutes before the meeting start time.

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