Identity and the Ego's Defense Mechanisms

Our identity is largely how we see ourselves, while our ego protects whatever our identity is, even if we haven't given it much thought. That is what we will discuss as we review how and why we defend parts of ourselves, we often are completely unaware of, as we explore the following clips:

Every Psychological Defense Mechanism Explained in 8 Minutes

Your EGO is NOT What They Told You

This group will be scheduled every two weeks at 4:00 pm-6:00 pm (CST) at Panera Bread, on University in Fort Worth at
Panera Bread 1700 S University Dr, Fort Worth, TX 76107.
Ideally we will be sitting at the long table on the left after entering.

The format of the group will consistently follow this pattern:

1. Settle in and start within first 10 minutes.
2. Review Ground Rules, Expectations and Weekly Topic (5-10 minutes)
3. Ice-breaker (will change every week) (10-20 minutes)
4. Main Topic of Discussion (45-60 minutes)
5. Closing Thoughts (10 minute)

The intention for "Blind Spots" is to intentionally discuss our own and society's various mental, emotional, ethical and moral boundaries and blind spots. These are by definition, emotionally charged topics, which is the very point.
The intention of this group is to learn how to better communicate and coincide with those you may not agree with or understand.
Blind Spots is intended to be a place were we can figure out how to better understand those we instinctively call the enemy.
Ground rules:

1. One person will speak at a time.
2. Critical thought and objection are both welcome, however be sure to challenge the content and not the personality.
3. When challenging another’s position, it is encouraged that you question from a place of “trying to understand the other individual’s position”, instead of intending on proving your point or theirs wrong through your questioning.

4)In the event discussion gets heated and volatile between two individuals or factions, the discussion will be halted, followed by taking the next 5 to 10 minutes, to use the remaining parts of the group to break down what just occurred and where communication broke down.

Icebreaker

• Discuss a time where you held a certain viewpoint or belief, you knew was the "truth", only to later realize it was something you were conditioned to believe?

1. What does it say about society, about us, that we give advice about things we actually do not even do ourselves?

2. Do you believe people prefer truth or delusion more and why?

3. In a past group, we came to the conclusion that we point out he faults in others leaders, while often rationalizing the leaders we tend to follow. Why do we do this and what do we risk if we were consistent with our values?

4. Why is it so challenging for us to recognize we are employing a defense mechanism?

5. What internally is happening to us when we are using a defense mechanism?

6. Defense mechanisms feel protective with a certain perspective, while feeling distasteful or outright delusional at times. Internally, what is the difference between seeing it as protective or delusional?

7. Projection is displacing emotions or frustration towards a person or object because it hits an insecurity within due to them acting as a mirror. What does it say about us, that we dislike someone because of the exact behaviors we possess?

8. Rationalization is an attempt to explain undesirable behaviors with one's own logical argument. How do we know if we are rationalizing our beliefs to make ourselves comfortable, or truly being consistent with our arguments?

9. Intellectualization- is an attempt to block out emotions through dissociation, in an attempt to avoid uncomfortable emotions. While this can be helpful is some situations, it also comes with quite a few limitations. What are the negative outcomes that pair with intellectualization?

10. Regression- is the concept of reverting to an earlier state of development. This is usually associated with someone reverting to a more childlike demeanor. A more subtle example would be reverting to old behaviors that aren't beneficial to you, but perhaps satiate anxiety or other negative feelings. How might this pop up for you?

11. Actively pointing out someone's defense mechanism, rarely calms the insecurity and likely dumps fuel on the fire. What is a better way of maneuvering around someone employing these patterns?

12. Avoidance is defined by the deliberate evasion of a certain topic, thought, feeling, person or situation. What are we actually avoiding when we do this? And how does this ensure the problem only gets worse?

13. Compensation is overemphasizing on a specific strength or area in an attempt to makeup for perceived or real deficiencies or failures. How does this limit our ability to grow outside of the areas we may be hyper-focused in?