What we’re about
👑 Everyone’s fair game – kings, queens, PMs, tycoons.
🗿 Statues mocked, saints side-eyed, myths mangled.
🍷 Bring sarcasm. Bring curiosity. Bring pub money.
Not quite the usual walking tour! Making fun of privilege and power.
It's really a mix of a night out with visits to pubs, lots of laughter and fun, quizzes, singsongs and a few props here and there.
Where does the tour go from?
The pub (TBA) there are approximately 3700 in London (*please note we will not be visiting them all) for a kick off drink….. get to know your fellow drinkers/sorry I meant walkers and suss out your Guide who does not have a blue badge nor a city of London or Westminster guiding qualification. That is why your tour costs 10 quid and not 110 quid.
Frequently asked questions:
What can I expect from a rat arsed tour?
Expect little and ye shall be thrilled beyond your wildest dreams.
Will I have to drink alcohol?
Of course not, but please remember your fellow pissheads sorry I meant walkers/history buffs will be merry and to be honest who needs to spend a couple of hours sober with people who think a pigeon finishing off a Greggs chicken nugget is funny.
Will I actually learn anything about London?
Yep you will, but if you want to hear about military campaigns of Charles I or the English reformation there are plenty of blue badge guides in London doing a splendid job. This guide is not your person. For the Gen Z crowd…. If you expect text book history you will not be vibing with your guide.
Disclaimer: Everything is geared toward having a laugh at the expense of historical figures and institutions. If you are easily offended by bad language, believe sarcasm is the lowest form of wit or take yourself too seriously this is not the tour for you. If you are the sort of person who smiles infrequently and laughs even less please do not book. Life is too short!
Upcoming events
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