16th Official Meet n Greet (Officially a Temporary Unofficial Event Name)

👑 BOARD GAME NIGHT XVI – THE RETURN OF THE QUEEN OF WONDERS 👑

For months, the Kingdom of Cardboard has burned. At first, it was subtle – a misplaced rule here, a missing token there. Games still started on time, but ended in confusion. The boards remained level, but the reasoning behind them began to tilt. Meeples once proud of their purpose started cutting corners — morally and literally. Strategies gave way to superstition, and laughter turned from victory to coping mechanism. Order didn’t collapse all at once — it crumbled one game at a time.

Whispers spread through the taverns and tabletops. How did this happen? How did a realm once so disciplined, so punctual, so well-laminated… lose its way? The scholars blamed Jason’s leadership. The merchants blamed inflation in goat-based economies. The priests of Probability blamed the dice. But the meeples knew. They spoke of the day the light dimmed, the day the rules stopped making sense, the day the Chair sat empty. They spoke of her. The one who once guided turns with grace, who restored order with a single glance. The one who knew how to stack victory points without toppling kingdoms. They whispered her name like a forbidden expansion. Mel. And through it all, a single question echoed in the ruins: “Where is Mel?” Where was she? Why had she left them? They said she had ascended. They said she was done with us. They said she was waiting for Kyle’s GPS signal to reappear. Would she return? In hushed corners and crowded nights, the question spread. Some whispered it like prayer. Others shouted it like protest. The hopeful began to wait by the door. The loyal left an empty chair at every table. And soon, even the faithless joined the chorus — calling softly at first, then louder with every unanswered game. “Please return,” they cried. “Please return our Queen and save us from ourselves.”

And far beyond the café, somewhere between myth and memory, she heard them. At first, just whispers carried on the Wi-Fi. Then the signs began. A half-completed rulebook fluttered open to the correct page. A discarded coffee loyalty card marked its own next stamp. Even the dice began to roll sixes again. The omens were clear. Disorder had gone unchecked for too long. And from whatever higher plane she had retreated to — whether celestial, caffeinated, or somewhere near Gasoline Alley —Mel rose. She looked upon the chaos — the lawsuits, the goat economies, the empty chair — and said the words that shook the kingdom:

“Enough!”

And in that instant, the lights brightened, the boards straightened, and Jason’s confidence wavered. The Queen of Order had returned.
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👑 THE RESTORATION OF ORDER ⚖️

First came the ruins of 7 Wonders.
The lighthouse leaned, the coins were counterfeit, and Jeff’s cursed “–2” tablet had achieved minor religious status. With a flick of her hand, Mel straightened the foundations, balanced the economy, and converted Jeff’s “–2” into a miraculous 7. The crowd gasped. Even the goats, long unemployed, bleated in approval.

Then she turned to Catan.
Across the cracked deserts, two rival nations still bickered over a single sheep.Mel redrew the borders with divine precision, re-opened trade, and introduced a new universal resource —humility. Jason attempted to negotiate, Mel granted him a restraining order instead.

From there, she strode into the ashes of Tokyo.
Monsters still roared, lawyers still argued, and the city trembled under radioactive paperwork. Mel raised one eyebrow — only one — and the beasts immediately surrendered their dice, apologized for property damage, and signed up for weekly group therapy. Peace, for the first time, was achieved through tone management.

In Ticket to Ride Europe, the tracks lay twisted in neon chaos.
Timetables wept, and passengers prayed for refunds that would never come. Mel gently touched the map; rails straightened, passports un-revoked themselves, and even the French trains arrived on time. Jason’s routes, however, were mysteriously rerouted through Siberia.

Then she journeyed back to the Stone Age.
Villages starved, Love Huts thrived, and civilization’s progress had plateaued somewhere between “fire” and “mild regret.” Mel restored balance: rationed resources, re-educated the tribes, and placed a divine “Closed for Maintenance” sign over the Love Hut. Productivity plummeted; morale stabilized.

Finally, she faced the Camel Court.
Lawyers brayed, camels demanded hazard pay, and the Union held the kingdom hostage with paperwork. Mel slammed the gavel once — thunder echoed. “All grievances forgiven,” she declared. “All races henceforth fair, fabulous, and free of emotional baggage.” The camels bowed deeply and immediately enrolled in her “Wellness & Hydration” program.

When the dust settled, the café glowed brighter than it had in months. The boards were level again. The dice rolled true. Even the espresso tasted like forgiveness. Jason looked around the room — at order restored, laughter returned, chaos banished — and said, with the conviction of a man who had learned nothing, “A lesser man would’ve prevented this. I am not that man.”
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🕊️ THE AGE OF PEACE (For Now) 🕊️

And so the Kingdom of Cardboard was reborn. Where once there had been confusion, there was now cooperation — or at least the polite illusion of it. The boards gleamed, the dice rolled evenly, and the espresso steamed like holy incense. For the first time in months, the rules were obeyed, and victory points meant something again. Mel presided over it all — calm, radiant, clipboard in hand. No rule went unclarified, no trade went unjustified, no meeple left behind. Her word became law, her glare became legend, and her sigh could still a thousand arguments. Jason, chastened but unbroken, vowed to “manage differently next time.”

Peace had returned to Wizard’s Loft Café. Laughter flowed again, cards were shuffled with reverence, and the espresso machine purred like a hymn. The Kingdom stood united once more — balanced, beautiful, briefly functional. But deep beneath the neatly stacked boxes, something stirred. A new rulebook rustled. A die rolled on its own. And though none dared to say it aloud, everyone felt it in their bones — Tuesday was coming.
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🎲 WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW 🎲

🎉 New Players Welcome – All subjects of the restored realm are invited to kneel, shuffle, and pray they draw something useful.
🎯 Game Selection – The Queen decrees that order shall be restored through play. The chosen game will reveal itself in time — as all prophecies do.
🎮 Got a Favorite Game? – Petitions for alternative entertainment may be submitted in triplicate and ignored in order of importance.
🎭 Dress Code – Attire fit for courtly worship: crowns optional, humility mandatory. Jason has been issued safety sleeves.
🍇 Etiquette – Bow before placing meeples. Do not question Mel’s math. Do not reference “house rules” unless you enjoy exile.
⚠️ Warning – Any re-emergence of goat-based economics, camel litigation, or Jason’s leadership will result in immediate divine audit.
📜 Fun Fact – Historians now refer to the last three months as “The Dark Age of Jason.” Recovery efforts continue.
🧂 Table Talk – Flattery may improve your standing with the Queen. Sarcasm may be recorded as treason. Use discretion.

– Temporary Steward of the Kingdom, Now Demoted to Player Two

📜 SINCE OUR LAST MEETUP 📜

🐫 The Camel Union has pivoted from lawsuits to wellness retreats; attendance is mandatory, hydration optional.
📉 Jeff’s “negative-point enlightenment” school has closed after accidentally achieving positive results.
☕ The espresso machine now hums hymns of gratitude, though it occasionally hisses “balance the board.”
🎭 Brad has opened a mediation service specializing in post-conflict Catan relations — first session free, emotional baggage extra.
👑 The Queen’s return has restored order to every corner of the café.
🧭 Kyle is still missing. And that’s strange — because she never comes back without him......