Dissecting Life in a "Sex Cult"

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"I was looking for meaning, and I found a marketplace for intimacy."
This week at Socrates Cafe, we are dissecting the complex, harrowing, and revealing story of Ruwan, based on his viral interview with Soft White Underbelly and his memoir, "Orgsm."
Ruwan’s story is not just a sensational tale of a "sex cult"; it is a case study on modern anxiety, the commodification of vulnerability, and the desperate search for connection in an isolated world.

### The Context

Ruwan’s journey began in a place familiar to many: deep anxiety, isolation, and a suicide attempt at age 15. His search for healing led him to OneTaste, an organization made famous by a TED Talk and centered around the practice of "Orgasmic Meditation" (OM).
Initially, the community seemed like a utopia. It offered healing that virtually eradicated his anxiety. However, the dream had a dark underbelly. Ruwan describes a bifurcated structure: older, wealthy individuals seeking experience, supported by young, impressionable laborers like himself.
The Reality Behind the Curtain:

• The Hook: While sex was the lure, people stayed for the deep emotional vulnerability—a commodity OneTaste eventually exploited.
• The Business: The organization allegedly mixed intimacy with predatory sales tactics. The New York branch alone generated $10,000–$20,000 a day at its peak.
• The Fall: The founder, Nicole (who reportedly sold the org for $12M), and her leadership faced federal convictions.

### The Critical Discussion

Ruwan left in 2014, facing a brutal readjustment to society. Yet, his outlook is ambivalent. He admits to "brainwashing" and "artificial validation," but also acknowledges learning profound communication and sexual skills.
We will explore the following themes:

• The Crisis of Male Sexuality: Ruwan suggests that men are often emotionally isolated. How do organizations exploit the male need for connection by disguising it as "sexual mastery"?
• Commodifying Vulnerability: At what point does a "community of healing" become a transactional marketplace? Is it possible to pay for genuine connection?
• The Paradox of the "Useful Cult": Ruwan admits he learned valuable skills despite the abuse. Can we separate the teachings from the teacher, or the growth from the trauma?
• Agency vs. Brainwashing: When does "surrender to the process" become a loss of free will?

Join us for an open-minded, critical, and respectful discussion on the blurred lines between self-help, spirituality, and exploitation.

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Note: This discussion touches on sensitive topics including suicide, sexual coercion, and psychological manipulation. Please approach the conversation with empathy.
Suggested Preparation: If you have time, watch the Soft White Underbelly interview with Ruwan or read summaries regarding the OneTaste controversy.