St. Pete Singles - The Beach Meetup

🏖️ Beach Singles Meetup: Lower Your Expectations Edition 🌊

Welcome to the Beach Singles Meetup! If you came here expecting a perfect 50/50 ratio, love at first sight, or a Nicholas Sparks movie moment... go fuck yourself. Here’s what you actually signed up for:

• Love is not going to happen. You might find a soulmate for 2 hours but they'll probably ghost you in the car ride home. We take no responsibility for your dreadful dating life.
• Keep your eyes up. No staring at people’s asses or anything for an uncomfortable amount of time. Sunglasses are not invisibility cloaks, we can still see you (unless they are tinted, then you may stare).
• The ratio is what it is. You may be outnumbered. You may be the hottest person here. You may be the only person here. Life is unpredictable. Grow up asshole.
• Hands to yourself. This is a singles meetup, not a beachside grab-and-go. If in doubt, assume “no” until told otherwise. You should be used to your hands to yourself at this point anyway you freak.
• If you can’t follow these rules, kindly fuck off. The ocean is right there, go have a deep, reflective moment with it.

Now, go forth, mingle, and remember: at worst, you got some fresh air and a decent tan or burn if you're a pasty fuck like me. 🌞💘

**Feel free to come with a friend, just add them as a guest**