The Unwifeable Collective

About Us

This is a community for women and non-binary people in New York who have grew up being socialized as female, and who have chosen not to participate in the heterosexual marriage system — a system historically built to serve patriarchy, restrict women’s freedom, and extract women’s labor, time, and emotional energy.

We are people who grew up navigating expectations placed on women, and who refuse to be molded into a role, a service, or a tradition. While everyone’s background and life path is different, we share common experiences shaped by female socialization. We are here to build friendship, solidarity, and new ways of living—on our own terms.

Our Goal

Our goal is to create a space where people socialized as female can connect, talk openly, and support one another. We meet to learn about feminist movements, analyze how patriarchal systems operate around us, and discuss real strategies for protecting ourselves—and younger women—from the pressures, myths, and aggressive behaviors that society still normalizes.

At the same time, this group is also about joy, fun, and living fully. We heal and strengthen ourselves by building community with people who feel familiar, grounded, and supportive, even while embracing our differences.

Outside of deeper discussions, we also make space to recharge and enjoy each other’s company:
• Coffee or tea meetups
• Group hikes and walks
• Meditation or yoga sessions
• Reading circles
• Seasonal city events
• Art shows and spontaneous, low-pressure outings
• Simple hangs where we exist together without explanation or performance

We know everyone is busy—join when you can, come and go freely, and feel free to message if you’d like to help organize an event.