“Why should you as a man even get a say?”
“Why do all these men want to talk about this so much?”
I’ve heard it many times. It’s a quick remark and is typically dismissed when trying to focus on other matters pertaining to the Abortion debate. But I’d like to put a little spotlight on this remark and settle this once and for all. Should Men Have a Say on Abortion?
If it is exclusive to women, does this mean women should be excluded from matters that pertain only to men? If it is exclusive to women, should we go further and make this an issue exclusive only to people who can become pregnant? Should we exclude women who are barren or post-menopause?
Is this just a way to silence opposing views? Are pro-choice men guilted as much as pro-life men when speaking about this? Should the 7 out of 9 men in the Supreme Court in 1973 had a say when they instated Roe v Wade?
If a woman can opt out of having a baby, should the man be able to opt out of paying child support? What if he did not want the baby to begin with and was advocating for an abortion? At the moment of conception is the man doomed to either pay child support or not based on the woman’s discretion?
Here’s a scenario: Husband & wife want a baby, so she becomes pregnant. As the fetus is developing, they become attached to it, they learn the gender (it’s a girl!), they have her name picked out, and Dad paints and sets up the baby’s room. Ultrasound pictures are on the fridge, sent to extended family, and at his desk at work. They enjoy feeling it kick and hiccup inside, and the dad is singing and reading to the belly every night.
However, the wife has been keeping it to herself but she's been having doubts. She’s nervous about their finances and has been battling depression; lingering thoughts that maybe she wont be a good mom. Her friends and mom have suggested maybe she needs to give it more time before deciding to be a mom. She's now at week 34; she feels bad for putting it off, but she has decided that she can't go through with it. So without telling her husband, she decides to go on a road trip with her friends to New Mexico (no restrictions whatsoever), and has an abortion.
Now ask yourself honestly: Should the man a say in this decision? Or should he just keep his mouth shut and stop trying to control women?
What are your thoughts? Come join us for a lively discussion! All views and beliefs welcome the more diversity of opinions the better.
Rule Of Etiquette: The goal is to have a productive free-flowing discussion, while also giving everyone a fair chance to participate accordingly. If you have any trouble getting a word in, please use the "Raise Hand" feature. We will have a loosely enforced 3 minute timer for each turn, and will allow 1-2 minutes for people to respond or weigh in between turns. Please be mindful of your time and the number of people waiting, and know that you can always put yourself back in the rotation for additional talking points. It is also encouraged to engage with others on your turn so that we can have more of a free-flowing dialog, rather than each of us just taking turns on our soap boxes.
Hope you can join us!
