About us
"I chose the road less travelled… Now I don’t know where I am."
"Never follow someone else's path unless you're in the woods and you're lost, and you see a path. By all means, you should follow that." - Ellen Degeneres
"Bring a compass. It's awkward when you have to eat your friends." - Unknown
So maybe we caught your interest?
Quick note then I’ll tell you what we’re about. We’ve never gotten lost or had to look at members as a food source. This is Chattanooga Outdoor Adventures not the Donner Party (some of you will get that).
We enjoys the outdoors in all forms. Events like Hiking, Rafting, Kayaking, and everything else.
But wait there’s more! I sound like a Ginsu knife commercial. Let’s not let any of the Donners have one of those.
We also plan other great activities in and around Chattanooga. Not just hiking. Musical events, food and wine festivals. A concert in a cave, you get the idea
It’s an open group and would love to get everyone involved and plan a lot of different things. Inclusion and fun are key.
Not just hiking, Adventures of all kinds
Upcoming events
10
Foraging for Mushrooms
Audubon Acres, 900 North Sanctuary Road, Chattanooga, TN, USYou have to buy a ticket for this. If you wait, someone else may be foraging for your mushrooms. There is a link below.
So this is a Mushroom Foraging 101 class. I am mostly sure there will be no hallucinogenic mushrooms on this trip. Trip, see what I did there? It starts with a 30-45 minute workshop with things like identification and safety. Then the remainder of the time they cut you loose to forage for shrooms.
It is $35 bucks. If you are seeing an origami-like deer carefully folded from a dollar bill, you need to take a moment, collect yourself, and realize a buck is a dollar bill. Well, it is also a deer. They coexist with the same name, and if the origami deer is talking to you, those weren't Shiitake mushrooms in your salad.
Here is the link to the tickets.
Ticket link-Choose September 12th.
These do sell out, so get your ticket now or hallucinate that you are with us and that origami deer.
So my mind got curious. Surely there are some documented cases of people doing shrooms and hiking. Yep, there most certainly are.
A few recounts include A giant Judget angry owl. They do seem like they can be judgey. Turns out it was a large rotting pine cone.
A Melting Mountain range that looked like a giant scoop of cookies-and-cream ice cream. Where is this mountain? Asking for a friend. If you know me and ice cream...
Breathing tree trunks wearing a corset and breathing dramatically. So Freud would have a field day with this one, but to my fellow hiker, if there was drama, keep hiking even if the tree is wearing lingerie. Not worth it if it robs you of your peace.
A hiker kept apologizing to the moss carpet he was stepping on because he thought it was tiny green muppets screaming. A million midget Kermits.
Other Wildlife Encounters include.
A hiker became locked in a 10-minute intense staring contest with a judgmental squirrel, convinced it was a tiny, disapproving British judge. Why does it seem all of the animals are judging us.
A deer standing perfectly still in the brush was perceived as a government spy wearing a tiny, invisible earpiece. The next Robert Ludlum thriller, the Bourne Bambi.
A row of caterpillars moving along a branch looked like they were dancing in perfect synchronization at a music festival. This guy was at Bonaroo, not on a trail.
A large, mossy boulder looked so exactly like a plush living room sofa that a hiker tried to sit on it and fluff the "cushions."
A dirt path appeared to flow forward like a grocery store conveyor belt, making the hiker feel like they were walking in place. I have heard that same complaint on some of my hikes. They appear to be longer than my write-up says. Must be the shrooms, you guys.
Low-hanging fern leaves looked like tiny green hands waiting to give the hiker a high-five as they walked past. I get the spider webs instead. That would really freak the mushroom-enhanced hikers.
I realized after reading some accounts of their trip in the woods, pun intended, that this is why I stay away from the stuff. I can't imagine where my mind would go.
11 attendees
Chattanooga Top Chef
First Horizon Pavillion, 1801 Reggie White Blvd, Chattanooga, TN, USThere are many examples of interspecies relationships in literature. Writers use them for a variety of very good reasons. Things like overcoming hate because of their differences, looking at human flaws through a non-human lens, and exploring compromise between either a couple or friends.
You have, of course, Beauty and the Beast, but at the heart of it, the beast is really a dude. Jack London's White Fang is between a man and a wild wolf. Also The Hobbit and Gollum, but that dude was way too concerned about his precious.
Then there is the life of Pi. Read the book. In a rare instance, the movie is actually better than the book. Except I really wouldn't call it a relationship. It is more of one trying to be sure the other one doesn't eat him. Relationships are sometimes difficult, but not being eaten is a different level of toxic.
Which brings us to Kermit and Miss Piggy. I never cared much for frog legs, but slow-smoked whole hog cooked on the right combination of wood, slathered in a tasty and tangy sauce might make the relationship tenuous at best. I mean, she doesn't have the sweetest personality, but prepared correctly, she can actually be both savory and have a little Umami flavor. Technically, frogs are carnivores, so who wouldn't be tempted after enough Hi-yah karate chops, and Kermie might be firing up the smoker of the relationship.
Parting is such sweet and delicious sorrow.
Am I speaking metaphorically? Kind of, but he can end the relationship with a delicious meal. So it does have an upside.
I have always loved the show Iron Chef, and they're doing one in Chattanooga. It is at the Market/ at First Horizon Pavilion.
They are doing it complete with a secret ingredient.
I would love to be the secret ingredient guy. Make me the Chairman who unveils the secret ingredients. I can see it now. These are highly trained chefs. Let's challenge them. Things like Funyuns, Vienna Sausages, boiled peanuts, Fun Dip, and Pork skins come to mind. Maybe Duke's Mayo too. Cheetos? You could do Cheetos too. My Iron chef would be next level. Or twisted. Probably twisted is better.
More details here.
Chattanooga Top ChefMeet at the stage, and we will try to find seating. You can wander around the market too and shop. Let's try to set up a home base at the stage area.
I m sure there will be food trucks and stuff to eat so let's plan to grab a table and then we can wander, eat and watch the show.
21 attendees
Past events
1992
