About us
Hi, I’m Melanie Mayell. I started the Christchurch Death Cafe early in 2016 after doing Deathwalker Training with Zenith Virago the previous year.
Since then the Christchurch Death Cafe has grown from 3 of us to over 1000 members with newcomers joining every month. This ever-changing conversation amongst strangers continues to be a bright thread through my life; a source of connection and soul-nourishing goodness. But it wasnt always like that.
In the early years I felt like a complete novice most of the time, terrified that a participant might start crying, ask a question I couldnt handle, or eeeek...walk out (all of which has happened). Now that I’ve helped several people to start their own DCs I can see I'm not alone in feeling out of my depth, particularly at the start.
We hosts are pretty much on our own once we are up and running. And although there are online forums – its not the same as an actual conversation with other people in the same role. With so many DCs now happening around NZ – I thought it timely to arrange a zoom call for us to get together to do some of the following:
- decompress
- get feedback on tricky participants
- support new hosts
- share ideas for growing the death conversation
- swap inspiration and ideas, books read, movies seen, etc,..
This is a chance for us to connect and share, and for those of us who have been doing it a while to help new hosts feel more supported.
Upcoming events
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Death Cafe Hosts NZ - Winter Zoom
·OnlineOnlineHappy winter everyone
The Christchurch Death Cafe is now 10 years old - it has grown and changed a lot in that time - and I have too.
I watched in the early days as our conversations dug deep into funerals, body care and the funeral industry. In the middle years I listened as participants wrestled with workplace deaths, suicide and living courageously with life-limiting diagnoses. These days the ever-changing mix of participants tend to be more philosophical, they talk about death in wider contexts like when a relationship ends or when a dream dies, they share the challenges of supporting aging parents while juggling their own health and career demands, and they share the joy of living rich and full lives because of their awareness of the preciousness and finiteness of this one life.
These days I notice there is less fear and more wonder - and thats probably due in part to my own healthier relationship with death.
While I'm still faithful to the original intention of the Death Cafe movement (group-led conversations, no speakers, no grief support), I can see that as hosts we need to be responsive to the needs of our own community, and we often wear many hats.
We don't all run our DCs the same way and that's OK. Lets learn from each other and continue the great work of bringing death out of the shadows.
DCH is not only an opportunity for us to connect and share as hosts from around NZ, but also a safe place to sink more deeply into our own relationship with death. For those of us who have been doing it a while let's help new hosts feel welcome and supported.
Join the zoom call and:
- decompress
- get feedback on tricky participants
- support new hosts
- share ideas for growing your death conversation
- swap inspiration and ideas, books read, movies seen, etc,..
- share resources
Death is for everybody
Melanie :-)Zoom Link for Wednesday July 1st 6:30pm (1 hour)
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89032697136?pwd=LaNNdKrqoULE1tqmK48iIAS1Sy6Z0k.1Passcode: gd9arL
8 attendees
Past events
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