What we’re about
Welcome!... I have been going to 'Here and Now' groups for 30 years and continue to be enthusiastic about how the situation provides me with the opportunity to be surprised, to get to know myself, to relate instead of switching off, and to connect with myself and others in unexpected ways. I hope you'll join me in a group meeting soon. Below are some more details about what's on offer here.
Richard Mills
This group provides a space for people to come together and relate authentically with each other in the 'Here and Now'.
The invitation is to:
• Stay in the here and now, to stay present, and notice your thoughts and feelings.
Try to avoid talking about ‘there and then’.
• Say anything you like.
• This group has no fixed agenda: allow space for the unexpected.
• Experience a group of equals where there is no leader to show you what to do. (The group will be peer-led after each group meeting has started. I, Richard Mills, your host, am an equal participant.
Group meetings have a beginning and an end time, but other than that have no structure, so as to allow an open space for the participants to use as they wish: there is no set task or division of roles.
The experience will be both interpersonal and intra-personal. This means that there is an element of relating to others in the group, so it's inter-active, but it also provides an opportunity for internal reflection, about how you are, in the moment.
The invitation is to avoid saying "What do you do?", "Where do you live?" etc. and instead to explore "What's really going on for me/you, right now?"
At times there may be silence in the group broken only when someone feels moved to speak.
This group is for those wishing to be part of a supportive environment whilst making authentic connections with others.
This group is not a facilitated therapy group, and you are responsible for your own well-being. The group is not suitable for people who are very emotionally fragile or disturbed, nor for anyone whose life is in chaos. Having said that, it should be fine for you as long as you welcome the opportunity to reflect on how you are in the present moment, and can tolerate the fact that we won't know what will be said. Whilst it may help you if you have had some experience of group-work, this is not essential. Please read the warning at the bottom of this page.
The Benefits
I can’t know about the benefits that you will definitely get, as we are all unique. But I can tell you about the benefits for me:
• Authenticity
• Aliveness
• Getting in touch with myself…feeling ‘connected up’
• Getting in touch with others…connections
• ‘Uncertainty training’
• The ability to wait
• Getting feedback from others
• Self-knowledge
Venue
Online groups are via Zoom, link in the meeting advert.
In-person meetings will be held in a private secure location, usually my office at
Oakwood House, 637 Roundhay Road, Oakwood, Leeds, LS8 4BA
The Guest House (by Rumi)
This being human is a guest-house
Every morning a new arrival
A joy, a depression, a mean-ness, some momentary awareness
Comes as an unexpected visitor
Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they're a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture
Still treat each guest honourably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
That dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
Further opportunities for Here and Now groups
I first found out about these groups in the CCI co-counselling network where I go to 3 or 4 residential events each year, and I go to one or two Here and Now groups each time. To find out more visit www.co-counselling.co.uk or
https://www.facebook.com/groups/co.counselling , a Facebook group open to the public.
WARNING
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This group is not suitable for absolutely everyone, and may not be suitable for you several of these apply to you:
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You rarely smile at anyone
-
You feel that the world is against you
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Your accommodation and work and social live are all in a state of chaos
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Your behaviour is significantly extreme
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Eye contact feels almost unbearable
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Your life has big highs and lows, over which you feel you have little control
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You frequently experience overwhelming despair
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You have suffered from serious psychotic episodes (= out of touch with reality).
If it is your first time at one of these meetings and you are in any doubt please phone me, Richard Mills, on zero 7984 zero zero 2495 or message me via meetup.
