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You will die, and so will everyone you love. Most of us spend a lot of energy not thinking about that. What would change if we did?

For our next gathering, we’re turning to mortality, one of four “ultimate concerns” from existential psychology. Irvin Yalom argued that awareness of death shapes how we live, even when we look away from it. Ernest Becker went further in The Denial of Death, arguing that much of human behavior is a defense against death anxiety. We chase achievement, status, legacy, and even romantic love partly to feel that we matter and will outlast our own lives. The Stoics approached it differently. Their practice of memento mori, remembering that life is finite, was meant to sharpen attention to what matters, not to produce dread. This session is about how we relate to that fact: what we avoid, what it clarifies, and how we want to spend the time we have.

Questions we may explore

  • How do you avoid thinking about your own death, and what does that avoidance cost you?
  • If you took seriously that your time is limited, what would you stop doing, and what would you start?
  • Can awareness of death make life feel more vivid, or does it mostly feel heavy?

You don’t need to answer all of these. Bring whatever is true for you right now.

How the evening works

  • We open with a short introduction to the group and its ground rules.
  • We have a facilitator, but generally allow a free form discussion.
  • We close with a brief wrap-up. No homework and no pressure to share more than you want to.

Ground rules

  • Respect perspectives that differ from yours.
  • No unsolicited advice and no “I’m sorry.” We respond with curiosity and acknowledgment.
  • What’s shared here stays here.

Who should come?
Men who want honest conversation, not small talk. No background in psychology or philosophy is needed, just a willingness to be honest with yourself and with the group.

Location
We meet in a quiet space in North Hills. The exact location will be disclosed over WhatsApp.

How to attend
You must join the newcomer group on WhatsApp, and let us know you are interested. Space is limited, so contact us as soon as possible if you plan to come. If you have issues with WhatsApp, you can message me directly through Meetup.

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