Montréal Men's Circle Group

The Way of the Superior Man — Part 3 - Women & Polarity

Tue, Nov 24 · 7:00 PM EST

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Online

Online

Please join within 10 mins of the start as the lobby will be closed after to allow conversations to start without interruptions.

What does it mean to become a man who is grounded in purpose, open in heart, and fully responsible for the life he is creating?

For this men's circle series, we'll dive into David Deida's The Way of the Superior Man — a provocative and often polarizing exploration of masculinity, purpose, relationships, sexuality, intimacy, and personal growth.
Rather than treating this as a traditional book club, we'll use Deida's ideas as a starting point for honest conversations about our own lives.

We won't necessarily agree with everything he says — the goal is to challenge our assumptions, learn from each other, and explore what these ideas mean in practice.

# The Way of the Superior Man — Meeting 3

In our first two sessions, we explored Deida's ideas around purpose, authenticity, personal responsibility, and the importance of living according to what matters most to us. We challenged ourselves to consider where we play it safe, seek approval, or allow everyday responsibilities to distract us from the lives we want to lead.

Now, we turn our attention to how these ideas show up in our relationships.
What does it mean to stay grounded in our purpose while being emotionally available to a partner? How do we navigate differences in needs, communication, and attraction without losing ourselves or trying to control the other person?

In this session, we'll dive into Parts II and III of David Deida's The Way of the Superior Man, exploring his provocative perspectives on women, masculine and feminine energy, attraction, and relationship dynamics.
As always, we'll use Deida's ideas as a starting point for honest conversation, not as gospel. The goal is to challenge our assumptions, draw on our own experiences, and better understand how we show up in our relationships.

Even if you missed either of the first two meetings, you're welcome to join us in the discussions.

### Reading (Optional)

Part II: Dealing with Women

• Ch 16: Women Are Not Liars
• Ch 17: Praise Her
• Ch 18: Tolerating Her Leads to Resenting Her
• Ch 19: Don’t Analyze Your Woman
• Ch 20: Don’t Suggest That a Woman Fix Her Own Emotional Problem
• Ch 21: Stay With Her Intensity—To a Point
• Ch 22: Don’t Force the Feminine to Make Decisions

Part III: Working with Polarity and Energy

• Ch 23: Your Attraction to the Feminine Is Inevitable
• Ch 24: Choose a Woman Who Is Your Complementary Opposite
• Ch 25: Know What Is Important in Your Woman
• Ch 26: You Will Often Want More Than One Woman
• Ch 27: Young Women Offer You a Special Energy
• Ch 28: Each Woman Has a “Temperature” That Can Heal or Irritate You

### Questions to think about beforehand

• How do I tend to respond when my partner is emotional, upset, or critical? Do I try to fix things, withdraw, become defensive, or stay present?
• How do I balance being grounded and decisive with being emotionally open and receptive?
• Have I experienced the kind of attraction or chemistry Deida describes as masculine–feminine polarity? What created it?
• Do I sometimes compromise my own values or direction to keep the peace in a relationship?
• How much of my understanding of masculinity and femininity comes from personal experience, and how much comes from cultural expectations?
• Where do Deida's views resonate with me, and where do I disagree?

### Discussion points

1. Understanding women — or understanding ourselves?

• What do we think our partners actually need from us?
• Do we listen to understand, or listen to solve?
• How can we avoid assuming that all women want the same things?

2. Masculine and feminine polarity

• What does polarity mean to us, and have we experienced it in our relationships?
• Does attraction depend on differences between partners, or can similarity create just as much chemistry?
• Can polarity exist in relationships that don't follow traditional gender roles?

3. Staying grounded when emotions run high

• What does it mean to remain present when someone we love is upset?
• How do we distinguish emotional steadiness from emotional detachment?
• When does staying grounded become an excuse for refusing to listen or take responsibility?

4. Direction, independence, and compromise

• How do we maintain a sense of purpose while making room for a partner's needs?
• When is compromise healthy, and when does it become self-abandonment?
• Can we lead our own lives without needing to control the relationship?

5. Challenging Deida's perspective

• Which of his ideas feel insightful, outdated, or overly simplistic?
• What can we learn from his framework without treating it as a universal truth about men and women?
• How can we build relationships that honour both partners as individuals?

### Closing question

How could you show up differently in your relationships if you focused less on changing your partner and more on how you respond, communicate, and connect?
Come ready to share experiences, challenge ideas, and learn from one another. The goal isn't to figure women out — it's to better understand ourselves and the dynamics we create with the people we love.

Looking forward to a fruitful conversation!
Mayar

----- Generic Meetup Description Follows ----

Join us for a friendly gathering of men (all ages welcome) where we’ll have an open discussion on anything and everything related to the experiences and challenges we as men face in the modern age.

The topics of discussion will vary from meeting to meeting, covering a wide range that could include work and money, relationships and intimacy, parenthood and family, loss and grief, travel and relocation, fitness and health, etc. The format is flexible and we may also leverage articles or excerpts from books in the area to guide the discussion.

Please note that this isn’t meant to be therapy or coaching.

We’ll provide a safe and confidential space and require the same from all our attendees. If you’re not the type to enjoy deeper discussion, this group is probably not the right one for you. The group will be kept on the smaller side to foster an intimate setting and allow everyone enough time to share.

This group is for men only. We understand women also face many of these challenges and we encourage you to join one of the many women’s-only meet-ups available in Montreal. This group will be held in English.

There is a small fee for in-person events to cover the space costs, online events will be free.

PLEASE NOTE: This group strives to create a safe and respectful space for open dialogue that aims to heal rather than exacerbate the divisions in society. While we agree that a lot of men are struggling in the modern world, we do not condone much of the unsavoury takes found in "the manosphere". However, we do extend a warm invite to men who may have been drawn to certain ideologies but are eager to transcend them. So if you're seeking to move beyond divisive perspectives and instead choose to focus on personal growth and positive transformation to become a well-rounded active member of society (including as a partner and father, if you choose), this group is for you!