Next Meetup

Inevitably, beyond the best of us, our partner sees the worst of us. Perhaps this is what makes ongoing committed love so difficult and so wondrous. Our limitations, weaknesses, and hang-ups reveal themselves again and again, and we ask of our partner to love us despite our own fallibility and all that we may do to conceal it. Moreover, those whom we love sometimes, and maybe even often, bring out the worst in us. In the next meeting of the Relationship Group on Saturday, October 20, 2018 (11:45 AM to 1:00 PM), I want to set forth a new perspective on romantic love that suggests deeper levels of intimacy occur through relinquishment, i.e., when one reveals to his or her partner the worst of oneself. These revelations often inspire conflict and distress, can be unconscious tests of the partner's commitment to the relationship, and may even take the form of self-sabotage. But if a couple can see beyond these possibilities and, instead, appreciate gestures of vulnerability and surrender inherent in the annoyances of one's partner, strife may be offset by understanding, empathy, and forgiveness. The next meeting of the Relationship Group will be on Saturday, October 20, 2018, 11:45 AM to 1:00 PM, at The Water Garden Business Center, 23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130, Laguna Hills, CA, 92653. The fee is $25.00. If you plan to attend, please RSVP to me at[masked] or at [masked]. Space is limited to the first 14 persons who register to attend. Please note that this group is psychoeducational and does not constitute psychotherapy.

The Water Garden Business Center

23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130 · Laguna Hills, CA

Respond by: 10/19/2018

What we're about

This meetup was formed to offer those who are interested in improving the quality of their romantic relationships a comfortable venue to talk about issues and gain feedback and support from each other. We meet the first and third Saturday of each month, 11:45 AM to 1:00 PM, at The Water Garden Business Center, 23432 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130, Laguna Hills, CA 92653. The fee is $25.00 per group meting.

As a psychologist in private practice for 16 years, I have worked with hundreds of persons with various types of relationship difficulties, most of whom were highly successful in other areas of their lives. What I have commonly found is that people approach romantic relationships in ways not of their own conscious choosing. Instead, it is our unconscious motivations -- of which we are seldom aware -- that often lead us to self-sabotaging and counterproductive tendencies and patterns.

Issues that we regularly address in group meetings include:

• Narcissistic and co-dependent dynamics

• Communication breakdowns

• Partner selection

• Commitment

• Attraction

• Gender roles

• Conscious and unconscious communication

Each group meeting consists of a brief presentation on a topic of interest that is then followed by a Q and A and open group discussion. For more information, please contact me via phone (949-338-4388) or email (

James Tobin, Ph.D.
Licensed Psychologist: PSY #22074
5020 Campus Drive
Newport Beach, CA 92660
Phone: 949-338-4388
Web: www. (

Disclaimer: Please note that this group and its contents are informational and didactic in nature. In no way is the group directed toward or constitutes the provision of psychotherapy. Participants who would like to have their personal issues addressed in psychotherapy re encouraged to consult with Dr. Tobin for a referral to a licensed mental health clinician.

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